Clickety-clack, clickety-clack, the wheels of the train mocked me as I tried to play Risk on a mobile device – is it just me or are mobile devices a conspiracy by a secret order of Masonic Ophthamologists trying to destroy the vision of everyone, making them need eyeglasses, contacts and even eye surgery? Time will tell. Leaving Toronto aka The Glorious Chaos as my brother aptly named it, I paused to think of the large, cosmopolitan city – wild, weird, at times, woolly, but wonderful as well. The Glorious Chaos is actually a suitable description of life. Sadly, those with Autism, like my son, experience Toronto and life itself differently. To him, it’s loud, smelly, bright, and crowded. To him, it’s overwhelming, scary, just generally creepy. But he has to live in the real world – whatever that means these days, so when my son is in a ‘good place’ (not The Good Place, a new comedy with Ted Danson and Kristen Bell, funny but hardly seems sustainable), I try to do things with him, a kind of sensory diet.
After a lovely visit with my brilliant and funny family (I’m biased, but they’re actually as I describe), we headed home, watching Summer’s bright promise fade, the quilt of Autumn cover the land, nestling under our chins as we snuggle into Winter. At no time of the year is chaos more clear than Fall, Thanksgiving, and Halloween https://yadadarcyyada.com/2015/10/28/monster-meet-and-greet-mash/ – especially Halloween, the most confusing holiday of all.
Children dress up, ignore their parents’ warnings (with encouragement) not to talk to strangers and instead go out in the dark to the homes of hundreds of strangers, begging for food. Adults also get in on the action, partying hard, many even wearing sexy costumes – angel, devil, nurse, vampire, ninja, cat, ninja cat, Frozen, Harley Quinn, Kylo Ren, Ken Bone, really, any ol’ Star Wars, Game of Thrones, Harry Potter (oh yes, I borrowed and read J.K. Rowling/Jack Thorne/John Tiffany’s Harry Potter and The Cursed Child, no spoilers, but it had Harry Potter and a cursed child, shhh, you didn’t hear it from me; they did manage to slide Robert Pattinson from Twilight fame in there too – how convenient) and Hunger Games https://yadadarcyyada.com/2015/10/16/you-cant-handle-the-blogging-truth/ I guess they’re hoping for one night of the year, Cialis Doesn’t Live Here Anymore?
And nothing says Halloween (other than mini chocolate bars begging to be eaten) more than strange, spooky viewing, what should it be this year? The Addams Family https://yadadarcyyada.com/2014/10/20/hide-and-shriek-with-the-addams-family/
It’s The Great Pumpkin Charlie Brown https://yadadarcyyada.com/2013/10/29/stuff-i-learned-from-its-the-great-pumpkin-charlie-brown/ and https://yadadarcyyada.com/2014/10/19/religion-politics-and-the-great-pumpkin/
Twilight Zone, Z Nation, The X-Files https://yadadarcyyada.com/2013/08/20/the-truth-is-still-out-there-2/ https://yadadarcyyada.com/2016/02/26/exs-and-ohs/ The Rocky Horror Picture Show https://yadadarcyyada.com/2013/10/25/the-rocky-horror-picture-show/
The Walking Dead (can you keep your eyes open for ‘it’?), Pet Sematary, The Munsters https://yadadarcyyada.com/2014/10/21/my-fair-munster/
Practical Magic (the true magic is family and friends), Bewitched, Army of Darkness, Goosebumps, The Nightmare Before Christmas https://yadadarcyyada.com/2013/10/19/the-nightmare-before-christmas/
Dracula, Young Frankenstein https://yadadarcyyada.com/2014/04/28/young-frankenstein-2/, Halloweentown (was there any need to make more than one?), Simpsons Treehouse of Horror
Arsenic and Old Lace https://yadadarcyyada.com/2013/10/25/arsenic-and-old-lace/, Friday the 13th https://yadadarcyyada.com/2015/03/13/its-friday-the-13th-do-you-know-where-your-serial-killer-is/, The Shining…
Scooby Doo https://yadadarcyyada.com/2013/10/31/the-mysterious-world-of-scooby-doo/ https://yadadarcyyada.com/2015/04/22/all-the-ways-im-told-im-stupid-everyday/ https://yadadarcyyada.com/2014/08/09/i-miss-saturday-morning-cartoons/
Beetlejuice https://yadadarcyyada.com/2013/10/25/beetlejuice/, Casper, Edward Scissorhands https://yadadarcyyada.com/2013/10/31/edward-scissorhands/
Buffy the Vampire Slayer https://yadadarcyyada.com/2013/10/29/buffy-the-vampire-slayer/, Lost https://yadadarcyyada.com/2013/10/25/lost/, Halloween – sigh, quit looking back, he’s still there – run! https://yadadarcyyada.com/2014/03/20/25-ways-to-stay-alive-in-a-horror-movie/
Aaaah, Thanksgiving (No turkey soup for you!!!), food coma aside (I even tried to avoid those little pushers at the mall – sure, they call themselves Girl Guides or Girl Scouts, they’re cute, but we know what they really are – you try to say no to cookies!), Thanksgiving should be everyday, a time to remember to be thankful – hopefully we know to be thankful for the right things. https://yadadarcyyada.com/2014/10/13/thankful-i-know-enough-to-be-thankful/
Still, there are some things I know for certain:
1. Always throw spilt salt over your left shoulder…if you want salt on your floor and shoulder.
2. With everyone texting and driving, for my part I welcome self-driving, computer cars – at least they won’t give me the finger (or will they?).
3. You don’t have the right to touch anyone without their permission…ever, did I mention ever?
4. Crossing paths with a black cat is dangerous…unless they’re doing something adorable, which is likely.
5. Pumpkin Spice it if you got it.
6. Make friends with the truth – it might be your best friend when no one else is.
7. Make decisions about people on their words and actions not their race, religion, country, political affiliations, sexual orientation, size, etc.
8. Comfortable shoes and chocolate are human rights, right?
9. Non-orange pumpkins used to seem weird, but lately orange things are scaring me.
10. Adam Lindsay Gordon got it right: “Life is mostly froth and bubble, Two things stand like stone. Kindness in another’s trouble, courage in your own.”
11. Kiss my grits is making more sense to me every single day…
12. Fear is more contagious than any disease and stronger than any army.
13. Remembering, looking back, glamorizing the past – it seems better, more fun, easier, but maybe, just maybe, complicated and different doesn’t have to mean bad – exercise your brain, it’ll look better in yoga pants.
Oh and of course, show love whenever you can. Enjoy The Glorious Chaos.
Humans are capable of greatness, but too often it’s just us saying we’re great. With all reverence, I’ll paraphrase the magnificent R.E.M.: In the eye of a hurricane, feeling your insides churning as you hear the pain. Bored of people only mis-serving, wanting to believe, can’t perceive their own needs.
Change the world, stop being fed up, instead follow through and follow-up.
Shriek after shriek, holler after holler, anyone will do anything to worship at the dollar, Bumbling, stumbling, perfectly baffled, trumped…
Tethered, biased on all sides, “winning” in a tournament of lies; chopped, cropped, plopped in front of another scream, another screen…
Another moment too obscene. Vitriolic, patriotic, slam fight, bright light. Feel like turning it all off and only watching Psych (you know that’s right)
It’s the end of the world as we know it (had some time alone). It’s the end of the world as we know it (in a media cone). It’s once again the end of the world as we know it…and I feel behind.
It’s been a stuffy, screeching, spooky, sweltering summer abundant with the bafflings of humanity and nature alike. Here I am, an oldening woman who blogs alone in a skiff in the Blog Stream trying to find the ‘best words’ and had gone sixty odd days now without blogging a post. Whether I shall turn out to be the heroine of my own life, or whether that prodigious station will be held by anybody else, these pages must show.
It is a truth universally acknowledged that a blogger, despite being in a break, cannot in good conscience ignore her blog birthday, a wonderful opportunity to thank her dear readers, who stick with her through ups and downs and even the not hanging around. Some years ago – never mind how long precisely (ok, Summer 2013) – having little or no money in my purse, and nothing particular to interest me on TV, I thought to blog about a little and see the bloggery part of the world.
It was the best of times. It was the worst of times. At any given time it can seem like the worst of times, but is it? There’s no world war. No Inquisition. No Ice Age. No plague. No killer bees. No asteroids hurdling toward the Earth (no worries, Bruce Willis will save us anyway).
No hoards, Attila the Hun, saber tooth tigers, or Genghis Khan. No cannibal galaxies hungering for galactic flesh (not to be confused with cannabis galaxies hungering for galactic munchies). No cat overlords, er, well, maybe a few cat overlords. No alien invaders (although there is that signal from HD164595, no worries, Will Smith will save us).
Last I checked, no zombie apocalypse, unless you count the overabundance of movies/TV shows about zombies and of course, smartphone users.
That’s not to say everything is wonderful. How could we not have problems? Over seven billion humans trying to coexist with each other, as well as animals, insects, fish, birds, and of course, Bigfoot, The Loch Ness Monster (Hi Nessie!), Yeti, elves, golems, El Chupacabra, dragons, Kala Bandar, vampires, werewolves, and all manner of magical beasts.
I don’t know about you, dear readers, but I struggle with first impressions. My instincts, often right, are second, third and fiftieth guessed. As I get older, I’m trying to listen to those first instincts; Maya Angelou was so right, “When someone shows you who they are believe them; the first time.”
It’s sooooo easy to sit around a kitchen, coffee shop, newsroom, living-room, bar, boardroom, online and fix all the world’s problems, but as Edward R. Murrow warned us: “Just because your voice reaches halfway around the world doesn’t mean you are wiser than when it reached only to the end of the bar.”
Cooking competitions, game shows, reality shows, sports – all answers are easy unless you’re actually doing it.
Lies are seductive, there’s no need to prove them, they just float out there in our new Fact-Free World. WTF (What The Fact).
Options? Just believe what we want to believe because we like who says it or how they say it. Forget the facts, it’s all about the feels. We feel like something is true, so now it is. I feel like I’m watching The Blair Witch Project instead of an election and as we know, what we feel is more important than the facts.
The biggest feels, fear…but if Star Wars and Yoda have taught us anything, it’s this, “Fear is the path to the dark side. Fear leads to anger. Anger leads to hate. Hate leads to suffering.”
And it’s been announced Trump is going to write, direct, and star in the next Star Wars film, Star Wars VIII: Make The Empire Great Again.
Oh la la Politics and the Public, seems like a Bad Romance. Elections, like watching children scuffle over a toy in a sandbox, caring less about the toy itself, but the prize of winning it. Divisive politics, like passing gas, it sure feels good, a relief to get it out there. Then what? The stench, the disgust of others…Passing gas is a necessity of life, although the reasons for more gas can be avoided.
I don’t like gossip, rumour, innuendo, speculation, tittle-tattle, lies, hyberbole. I like facts. I miss when the news was news, actual facts and events, not just guesses, conjecture, speculation, and supposition. Taglines, soundbites, and slogans – more important than substance, service, and civility; mocking has become an acceptable form of communication…
Blindly following anyone or anything, without questioning, doubting, challenging, like it or not, no matter what you call it, you’re in a cult…or a mob…or a joke.
When I paused my blogging I felt so far behind I didn’t even know who shot J.R…yes, that far behind!
Now I feel a little better, more caught up.
I’ve been writing a book, well, an outline and a chapter.
I’ve been reading. Resting. Visiting. Appointmenting. Decompressing. Researching. Regenerating.
Sadly, I was viciously attacked by migraines, but some downtime hooked up to an IV gave me time for deep thought…just kidding, I was thinking the doctor, McDreamy might fall in love with me, Grey’s Anatomy style (preferably with less whining). Also thinking a hospital would be a bad place to be during a zombie outbreak, but with a lot of potential weapons. I also wrote this post in my head, so it might be a bit scatty. Revisiting aspects of my life, including my wardrobe, still going for comfortable, but maybe hobochic. What do you think, dear readers?
What else have I been up to? Planning. Playing. Re-watching a few things, the newer Battlestar Galactica (So Say We All) and Warehouse 13 – thank you dear Teagan https://teagansbooks.com/ for making me want to revisit The Warehouse; I’m always happy there. It reminds me that the biggest adventure, is life itself, and that the spirit of The Warehouse is inside us all, the spirit of endless wonder.
I even know who Gossip Girl is (I’ll never tell xo xo). Caught up on John Oliver back despite popular demand, funny and truth, can’t get enough of that. Almost lapsed into a cheesy made-for-TV movie coma with never-to-be classics such as but not limited to: TV adaptations of Joanne Fluke’s Hannah Swensen murder mysteries https://yadadarcyyada.com/2016/05/25/crapathy/ Murder, She Baked (where ex-soap stars drop by for a cookie break; Cookie Monster should make a guest appearance!).
It seems the reports of my blogdeath have been greatly exaggerated https://yadadarcyyada.com/2016/07/08/so-long-and-thanks-for-all-the-fish/ but despite all these words, I still don’t know if I have the best words. What do I know? I know I was sad to hear about the passing of Gene Wilder. The first thing I thought was, “Put… the…candle…back!” https://yadadarcyyada.com/2014/04/28/young-frankenstein-2/ https://yadadarcyyada.com/2014/07/20/charlie-and-the-chocolate-factory-turns-50/ https://yadadarcyyada.com/2014/06/03/happy-40th-anniversary-blazing-saddles/ Thank you, Mr. Wilder, for the joy, you’ll keep us laughing for years to come.
I know my heart was heavy and uplifted as The Tragically Hip sang a very public goodbye, a final gift of music to everyone they love: fans, band members, family, friends, hometown of Kingston, Ontario and Canada…I alternated between singing and crying, sometimes both at the same time.
I know I’m thankful to everyone who continues to support my blog – my wonderful readers, fellow bloggers, also, the lovely ladies at #BloggersPitStop for all the support. I know I’m grateful you could stop by for my belated blog birthday bash. Enjoy the party games – watch out, you don’t know what will be pinned where these days!!! Enjoy the virtual cake (as always, you have me at cake) – even chocolate has no calories!
Feel free to visit, we’ll pretend we’re under the sea in an octopus’s garden – that’s where I’d like to be, under the sea, in an octopus’s garden in the shade.
So maybe the best words are…please, be kind, what the hell do you have to lose?
It’s never easy to say goodbye. Ok, that’s not true, sometimes it’s super easy to say goodbye, in fact, you wished could’ve said goodbye much, much earlier. You’re with someone, they’re annoying you, but it’s impolite to leave, or you feel you should or have to stay. Or when you’re at a party, function, event, etc. and some guests are driving you up a wall. There are times when you’re screaming goodbye in your head, measuring how many steps it would take to get to the door, or wondering if anyone will notice if you were to dive out of the window, full-on Die Hard – hmm, was that what Shakespeare was picturing when he said, ‘Parting is such sweet sorrow, wait to jump out that window till the morrow’? Something like that.
We love to tell stories, we’re natural born storytellers. Over 7 billion of us on the planet, telling our stories. So many stories. While we’re telling those stories, or hearing those stories, we’re not going to agree on everything all the time or be pleased all the time, but could we put all the hate, bullying, vitriol, name-calling, hyperbole, lies, persecution, injustice on the shelf? Maybe we could strive to disagree respectfully. There are many ways to tell stories, from many perspectives.
A long-awaited specialist appointment (now waiting for more, er, stuff and trying new, er, stuff) opened and reopened my eyes. No worries, it’s not fatal, to the best of my knowledge, it just feels like it’s killing me…
1) I need to take a break and focus on my health.
2) I need to write, not just blog posts, but my book, and maybe try to make more money to pay for my dirty habit…to clarify, it’s my chocolate habit, but it can be dirty; dark chocolate especially leaves terrible stains and smears everywhere.
3) It’s with a heavy heart that I write This Is Where I Leave You…actually, I didn’t write that, Jonathan Tropper did and it was delightfully flawed, if a little clever-clever, but I appreciate the exertion. Plots and characters somewhat transparent yet quite engaging. His authentically muddled and intriguingly idiosyncratic style keeps me reading. Hollywood made a valiant attempt to adequately adapt it to the screen with: Tina Fey (SNL, Mean Girls, 30 Rock, Spongebob Squarepants, Simpsons, Sisters, Muppets, etc.), Jason Bateman (Arrested Development, Zootopia, Juno, Paul, Little House on the Prairie, Knight Rider, etc.),
Adam Driver (Star Wars: The Force Awakens, Girls, J. Edgar, Lincoln, The Unusuals, etc. ), Timothy Olyphant (Deadwood, Justified, Catch and Release, Live Free or Die Hard, The Mindy Project, The Office, Hitman, Call of Duty), Dax Shepard (Robot Chicken, Idiocracy, Parenthood, and endless odd Samsung commercials with wife, Kristen Bell who will always be Veronica Mars to me, also great in Deadwood), Jane Fonda (The Newsroom, Barbarella, On Golden Pond, Sunday in New York, Cat Ballou, Barefoot in the Park, The Butler, Georgia Rule, They Shoot Horses Don’t They, Klute, Coming Home, The China Syndrome, The Morning After, and you may know her from her activism and/or groovy exercise videos).
4) I might need to cut back on TV, way too many shows are just ads in disguise. ie. Ride with Norman Reedus should actually be titled: American Tourism, Ducati, BMW, Harley-Davidson, Honda, Indian, Kawasaki, KTM, Suzuki, Triumph, and Yamaha Pay For Ride with Norman Reedus. And it’s weird how he wanders around never opening his wallet, it’s like he’s still on The Walking Dead, I guess there’s no need for money during the zombie apocalypse – the Daryl Dixon Discount.
Gorgeous bikes, scenery, people (well, mostly), but obviously one long commercial. Don’t know if I’m now more or less inclined to be sad if Negan chooses Daryl. Just sayin’.
I’ll forgive AMC, after all, they also gave us: Breaking Bad, The Walking Dead, Talking Dead, Hell On Wheels, Mad Men, Fear The Walking Dead, Turn: Washington’s Spies, The American West, Into The Badlands, and now, Preacher, a gruesomely heartening supernatural tale of good vs evil, or more like good vs itself.
5) I need to find new ways to de-stress. Stress is everywhere these days. Even dogs and cats are under pressure to perform, and not just in endless and often demeaning internet videos, gifs, memes, etc. (see above, but how cute is that?); just look at their food – it has to be high in fiber, promote lean muscle, keep them at a healthy weight, all so they can be adorably frisky and playful, for our amusement. Amusement seems more important now than ever. We need to be constantly amused, entertained, busy. Is it a latent, twisted version of hunting and gathering, we now hunt and gather entertainment?
We even amuse ourselves with foodporn, I mean, food now…
6) I’m crushing on teacup pigs, some call them pocket pigs, or micro pigs, but I worry about their popularity, they could get bought up by someone like Bill Gates and we’ll have to buy endless crappy versions of them – Microsoft pigs.
7) I need to catch up on my reading. Numerous library books await my attention, with due dates, apparently some others have the nerve to want to use
my the public library.
Life is all about the journey, not the destination, and sometimes that journey takes you not where you meant to go but where you’re meant to be. Reading takes you anywhere you want to go and while some books may not change the world, they could change your world.
My books to review basket is also overflowing. I almost missed out on a great murder mystery, These Shallow Graves by Jennifer Donnelly in the bookflood https://www.goodreads.com/review/show/1415718938 And I’ve enjoyed indie works – hidden treasures, like the ones previously mentioned here https://yadadarcyyada.com/2016/01/29/always-on-my-mind-blog-party/ and so many more. Luckily I can’t physically see the Netgalley books unless I log on, so I’m pretending I forgot my password (psssh, I know you remember your password). Books have many purposes: entertainment, distraction, learning, companionship, dreaming, but really, like pop culture they’re a way of examining life, a form of philosophy. Long time readers of this blog know I have an ongoing love affair with books, including Open Court’s …and Philosophy series, but there are so many of them, how can I read and review them all? I can’t, but I sure can try. If not on here, then on Goodreads. ie. https://www.goodreads.com/review/show/1677400824
8) I wish The Newsroom (stunning cast of: Jeff Daniels, Sam Waterston, Emily Mortimer, Jane Fonda, Alison Pill, John Gallagher, Jr., Thomas Sadoski, Dev Patel, Olivia Munn, Marcia Gay Harden, Chris Messina, Kat Dennings, David Harbour, Hope Davis, Kelen Coleman, Grace Gummer, Constance Zimmer, B. J. Novak, etc.) was still on and that more people watched it.
Aaron Sorkin is a master at presenting all sides of, well, everything, logically, rationally, especially politics. We need more of that. Smart, well-balanced writing. To me, Sorkin is the ultimate optimist, an anti-cynic, after all, who else would keep monologuing, writing epic, inspiring speeches and broadcasting them in the hopes he’s actually reaching people, not just cleverly preaching to the converted.
9) So…Politics…That happened. I feel all Alice Through The Looking Glass, what if it’s all a dream? Maybe I went through a mirror, fell down a rabbit hole, opened a door, magically traveled through a wall to Platform 9 3/4, opened a portal, a Stargate, a paratime machine, a window, a crack? I keep hoping I’m in some alternate reality, some parallel Universe and I’ll wake up. Are we BrainDead (funny show, but making me a tad paranoid of the ants that keep invading my place)? Have aliens taken over politicians? Naah, too obvious. As Alexander Hamilton said: “If you don’t stand for something, you will fall for anything.”? Hmmm, how about stand for something with even a hint of logic, intelligence, integrity, or sanity?
Donald Trump, #Brexit, bogus indignation, lies, corruption, murder, abuse, war, poverty, disease, starvation, terrorism (of course, we’ve always got a new foe, it’s important to keep us scared, worried, after all, we buy more that way). Imagine what we could accomplish if we focused on what mattered and would help all people, not just a select few.
It’s too easy to long for a simpler times. Watching Brooklyn (https://yadadarcyyada.com/2016/01/08/stand-by-me/) it seems like life was simpler, less complex, less contentious, and it’s true in many ways. But we can’t live in the past. Can’t go back. Can’t unring bells that have been rung. With technology ruling our lives, we have to find ways to somehow enjoy the benefits of here and now without being consumed and overwhelmed by the here and now.
As for Brooklyn the film? It’s a nicely unpretentious offering about the choices we make and those that are made for us. Saoirse Ronan (Atonement, Hanna, City of Ember, The Host, The Lovely Bones, The Grand Budapest Hotel https://yadadarcyyada.com/2015/09/20/if-i-had-a-million-dollars/) is, as always, astonishing, With the depth of her performance you’d think she was 102 instead of 22; she expresses so much, so perfectly, sort of an anti-Kristen Stewart. Rounded out by the talented: Jim Broadbent (Harry Potter, Paddington, Bridget Jones’s Diary https://yadadarcyyada.com/2013/12/19/bridget-joness-diary/ https://yadadarcyyada.com/2013/11/08/bridget-jones-mad-about-the-boy-sorry-with-spoilers/ and a million others), Julie Walters (Calendar Girls, Harry Potter, Mama Mia!, Brave, and at least a million others), Emily Bett Rickards (Felicity Smoake in Arrow), Domhnall Gleeson (Star Wars: The Force Awakens https://yadadarcyyada.com/2015/11/05/go-home-star-wars-youre-drunk/ Harry Potter, The Revenant, About Time https://yadadarcyyada.com/2014/08/16/its-about-time/), etc.
10) I’ve thought a lot about why the world more closely resembles the last days of Roman Empire and that line Gena Rowlands uses to chide/teach her moviedaughter, Sandra Bullock in the romcom Hope Floats, “It’s the worst kind of extravagance the way you spend your chances”. What if this applies to the whole world now? We need to stop spending our chances.
We need to stop settling. Stop lowering our expectations. Go out there, spend your chances wisely. We may live in a world supercharged by social media, where we dramatize each problem, instead of looking for solutions. Where gossip, blame, fighting, arguing, cool cynicism, magical thinking, phony outrage, lowest common denominator pandering, digital degrees of The Butter Battle Book, The Lorax, and The Cat in the Hat combined (Dr. Seuss would be so proud) rule the day. Where intelligence is mocked, sensationalism screams loudest, bits and soundbites of information, right or wrong, reign supreme. In fact, it would be really funny, if it wasn’t such a sad mess…
It doesn’t mean we have to buy into it. We can be more. Rise above. Care. Have character, loyalty, integrity, even if it’s not cool to do so. Choose courage. Choose love. Choose hope. Caveat emptor, lest we drown in the muck. You’ll find true power in being kind.
I write this with tears in my eyes and the words to Green Day’s Good Riddance (Time of Your Life) playing over and over in my head: “It’s something unpredictable, but in the end it’s right. I hope you had the time of your life.” I do, I hope you had the time of your life, I certainly did.
I can’t thank those of you who have supported me enough! Thanks for following, sharing, reblogging, commenting, visiting. I’m not ruling out coming back at some point, I’m just not well enough to continue now.
I’ll still visit my blogging family and friends regularly. Still take part in some parties, social media stuff, etc. Blogging is addictive. When you first do it, you feel like you’re standing naked (sorry for the visual), exposed, and then you start to love it. You have to silence your inner critic (she’s just jealous).
My posts stay here, so please, visit my vaults whenever you’d like, comment, share, I’ll still be here, after all, almost 3 years of blogging later there’s close to 600 posts, like these:
I’m not ruling out returning to this blog or another blog, or bookstores near you (she wrote wistfully). Some time away might recharge my batteries and I will regenerate (I could be the new Doctor in Doctor Who, I think it’s time for a female Doctor). Until then, so long and thanks for all the fish…come on, you think I’d leave without something to do with Douglas Adams, he’s at least partially responsible for my brain. I might be down now, but there’s no time limit on getting back up. It doesn’t matter how long it takes, I’ll get up, dust off, and be back, one way or another!
Life is choosing. Choosing to be happy or sad. Nice or mean. Hopeful or hopeless. Among the mass of expectations, concepts, beliefs, abstractions, and stereotypes swirls millions and millions of choices. We’re not always going to make the right choices. Sometimes we’re mean and feel sorry, sometimes we’re sorry we’re not more mean.
I recently rewatched Josie and the Pussycats, the movie, although I loved the cartoon also – https://yadadarcyyada.com/2014/08/09/i-miss-saturday-morning-cartoons/ – it reminded me:
1) It’s hilarious, even 15 years later, maybe more so;
2) It’s wise and relevant, especially about how we’re brandwashed, er, brainwashed;
3) The words to the song keep echoing through my head, “Can’t you just pretend to be nice, can you at least pretend to be nice, if you could just pretend to be nice, then everything in my life would be alright.”
For me, people who pretend to be nice are pretty much as annoying as meanies. “A person who is nice to you, but rude to the waiter, is not a nice person.”- Dave Barry Yet there are still tons of genuinely nice people…but we’re designed to notice danger, it’s for survival. We notice loud stuff, outrageous stuff, bad stuff – it was meant to help us notice danger, pay attention to danger, to keep us safe and to keep our loved ones safe, but now, sigh, there’s the internet, you know the internet, like your neighbourhood gossip on steroids, virally, digitally frothing at the mouth.
Texts, tweets, memes, video, posts, gifs, statuses, chats, comments, updates, etc., blaming, blaming, blaming – basically blaming everyone – immigrants, women, social assistance recipients, minorities, religions, etc., well, that won’t get you a job, or make the rich stop screwing you (without consent or foreplay). Just as spewing vitriol won’t change your economic or socioeconomic status, or get you something you want, or bring back those you love. Sorry Grandma and Grandpa, sorry Mom and Dad, your famous, “if you can’t say something nice, don’t say anything at all” is stone cold dead. We’re all quickly learning you’re entitled to your own opinion and your own facts – just ask The Incredible Trump.
Maybe it’s easier to lash out than look in. Is it easier to yell at a clerk? Or scream at a receptionist (by the way, no one was paying any attention to your information until you screamed)? Or sharpen your claws: ‘You’re so brave to wear that shirt.’ Brave, really, I’m not running into a burning building to save babies and puppies, oh I see, you’re being catty. Than to just be nice?
When I asked an ex (note the word ‘ex’, for many, many reasons) why he couldn’t just be nice, his answer was, ‘it’s too much work’. Really? Could that possibly be it? Is it just easier to snark, snarl, sneer? Easier to mock, mimic, moan? Is meanness, ridicule, viciousness, derision a form of laziness?
Bad guys, bad boys, charismatic anti-heroes are cool on TV, in movies and books https://yadadarcyyada.com/2015/03/06/charming-savage-events/ but in real life, not so much.
Then again, if you’re not: molesting, abusing, being racist, getting all mass murdery, killing serially or non-sequentially, making human skin coats, terrorizing, stealing, lying, raping (yes, creepy, horrible Stanford rapist and any other rapists, no still means no and to clarify, unconscious also means no; not difficult to understand), you probably still qualify as ‘nice’, but hopefully we can try to raise the bar way, way higher.
Speaking of nice, I’m thrilled (thank you kindly) to be one of the winners of the Blogger’s Pit Stop and The Pinterest Game – please drop by, visit, share, it’s a great way to connect with other bloggers and lots of fun.
Julie http://juleskalpauli.com/bloggers-pit-stop-27/ featuring: https://yadadarcyyada.com/2015/08/27/message-in-a-bottle/ and https://yadadarcyyada.com/2015/01/04/so-youve-ruined-your-lifenow-what/
Get out there, be a shameless social media self-promoting bloghussy (like me), most of all, enjoy!
Where I’m a complete twit: https://twitter.com/yadadarcyyada
Endlessly baffled by humanity: https://www.facebook.com/yadadarcyyada
The desert where I wander: http://www.pinterest.com/dpark2/
Where I google, not nearly as fun as it sounds: https://plus.google.com/112672588892199127381/posts
To the best of my knowledge, there’s no standardized testing for ignorance, intolerance, meanness, or unhappiness yet, but I’d buy stocks in that future booming business. Be nice, you don’t know what people have been through or are going through.
Is it too late to say sorry? ‘Cause I’m missing more than just your bloggy. Yeah, I know-oh-oh, I want to be a good neighbour bloggy (ok, perhaps I’m not going to be rapper anytime soon). I know it’s a busy time of year, but drop by whenever, dears, my blogdoor is always open. Please leave links in the comment box. Drop by often. Enjoy the virtual cake, chocolate, cupcakes, tarts, pies, cookies, and er, liquid refreshments. Meet and greet other bloggers. Introduce yourself. Be kind. Be nice. Have fun. Obvious now I’m from Canada, eh? Sorry.
Stressed. Stressed out. Every day we hear how people are stressed out, exhausted, scattered, distracted, besieged, anxious, under pressure, just generally overwhelmed. Times haven’t changed, just magnified, still going in circles; instead of Keeping Up With The Joneses, we’re trying to Keep Up With The Kardashians.
Our Amygdala’s primary job is the processing of memory, emotional reactions, and decision-making, that’s a lot to handle, so she can get a little overstimulated. Her nanny, the Prefrontal Cortex is all like, whoa, slow down, Amy, you need a time out. But what if chronic stress has hacked PreCor, making it too weak to calm Amy down, stop her from some unrestrained Brains Gone Wild moments? As my fav song by The Tragically Hip says, we Blow At High Dough, that’s us, going too fast, burning up, burning out.
My growing, life-changing magic of apathy toward crap, a sort of crapathy, has me bored, yes, but also ashamed, ashamed of our frivolity, and at myself for being any part of it. I can’t change my hyper-awareness of all the crap, but I can change my perception, actions, and reactions.
Many experts, including renowned time researcher and sociologist, Professor John P. Robinson, known as Father Time, agree that not having enough time is actually an illusion, self-imposed, many people have more leisure time than ever before. https://socy.umd.edu/facultyprofile/Robinson/John%20P. Then why do we feel so overwhelmed? Maybe it’s all the things we’ve been sold to improve and simplify our lives. Really, why, when complicated means more money.
Growing up I wanted to be Nancy Drew…instead I was Donna Parker. Both outrageously ignored repeated and dire warnings while being fiercely loyal, generous, and independent. Both wore, gasp, dunagrees.
My dunagrees and detective cap on, I find my courage and follow the clues, to investigate what’s working in my life and what isn’t; I join the ranks of those who couldn’t resist the siren call of a mystery:
Nancy Drew, Miss Marple, Monk, The Scooby Gang https://yadadarcyyada.com/2013/10/31/the-mysterious-world-of-scooby-doo/ The Hardy Boys https://yadadarcyyada.com/2013/10/01/american-gothic/ Sherlock and Watson https://yadadarcyyada.com/2014/03/13/sherlock/ Sookie Stackhouse, Donna Parker, McCloud, Shawn Spencer and Burton Guster https://yadadarcyyada.com/2015/01/10/having-the-last-laugh/
Mulder and Scully https://yadadarcyyada.com/2013/08/20/the-truth-is-still-out-there-2/ Sam Spade, Veronica Mars, Honey West, Hannah Swensen https://yadadarcyyada.com/2015/09/05/ive-had-the-time-of-my-life/ The Bobbsey Twins, Father Brown, Phryne Fisher https://yadadarcyyada.com/2014/09/06/miss-fishers-murder-mysteries/ Temperance Brennan (Bones), Alex Cross, Ellery Queen, Mannix, Elvis Cole, Murdoch, Quincy https://yadadarcyyada.com/2013/11/08/quincy-m-e/ Patrick Jane, Mike Hammer, Cadfael, Cherry Ames, Cagney and Lacey, MacMillan and Wife (she had a name, Sally), Stephanie Plum, Kay Scarpetta, Columbo https://yadadarcyyada.com/2013/11/09/just-one-more-thing-columbo/
Jane Tennison, Lord Peter Wimsey, Audrey Parker https://yadadarcyyada.com/2015/08/02/never-tear-us-apart/ Clarice Starling, Daisy Dalrymple, Phillip Marlowe, Peter Gunn, Nick & Nora Charles, Frost, Dexter https://yadadarcyyada.com/2013/09/24/goodbye-dexter/ Magnum, The Harts, Nero Wolfe, Jessica Fletcher https://yadadarcyyada.com/2015/06/30/glory-days/ Foyle, Poirot, Jim Rockford, Perry Mason, Jessica Jones, Houdini and Doyle?
Inspector Clouseau, Castle https://yadadarcyyada.com/2016/05/06/nothings-gonna-stop-us-now/ Trixie Beldon, Rizzoli & Isles, Dupin, Sally Lockhart, The Girl Who…well, you know what she did.
My Cases So Far:
1. The Clue in the Diary (decoded, started a blog).
2. The Secret of the Old Biological Clock (unraveled, acceptance).
3. The Haunted What Ifs (the voices of my past fade into the void, including but not limited to: family, friends, Prince, Bowie, The Tragically Hip aka The Hip, Spirit of the West, The Ramones, etc. Yet I have to smile, because they happened).
4. The Sign of the Twisted Scandals (solved, don’t care).
5. The Mystery of the Dating Dilemma (more probing needed).
6. The Secret in the Old Attic (aka my head, ongoing).
7. The Password Puzzle (deciphered, but it’s a secret).
8. The Aging Writer Mystery (further review).
9. The Ghost of Broken Dreams (phantom case).
10. The Clue of the Missing Keys (found, Marie Kondo organized my life https://yadadarcyyada.com/2016/02/14/who-loves-ya-baby/).
Broke, obscure, and chronically ill, I have probable cause to get discouraged and depressed. It’s easy to believe the voices that bludgeon me, sticking a knife into my self-confidence, slamming an axe into my feelings of worth, poisoning my pride, shooting holes in my dignity. The suspects are many, with means, motive, and opportunity, so I have to solve the mystery, before it’s too late!
You probably didn’t think you had time to read this whole post, so like me, maybe you need to Go Nancy Drew Yourself!
Through the blog storm,
we reach the shore
We give it all
but they want more
And we wait for views
With or without you
Can’t blog with
or without views
And you blog yourself all day
And you blog, and you blog
And you blog yourself away.
If this had audio you’d know I sang it just like Bono of U2, it’s like we’re twins, ok, maybe closer to the Swedish Chef from The Muppets, but it’s all good.
Blogging is a lot like cooking. Some people do it instinctively. A pinch of this. A dash of that. Somehow they know just the right blend. Others follow a precise recipe.
1. First thing you need to decide, what kind of cooking, I mean, blogging do you enjoy? Home-cooked, formal, informal, sugar-free, spicy, sweet, sour, no artificial flavours or colours, grilling, gourmet, fusion? Do you want to indulge your readers with moist, sweet chocolate brownies (my secret, melt the butter, let it cool then slowly add it to the mixture) or spicy chipolte chicken taco with guacamole (drooling)…
2. With blogging, like cooking you need an appreciative audience. Those who don’t just eat to live, but live to eat. Those who don’t just like blogs, but love them.
3. Posts can fill up our email like a meal can fill up our stomachs, but too much of a good thing can be overwhelming, sometimes a snack is the way to go.
4. Processed food, junk food, fast food, sure, they call themselves food, but really, food by any other name is not always food…same goes for blogging.
5. The blogging community is family style dining, so just dig in, reach over, around, share, like, join in, engage! Don’t just invite others to your table, sit at theirs too! Eat up! Even indulge in blog parties…
Jason – https://aopinionatedman.com/
Elena – http://blogsharelearn.com/blogsharelearn-linky-party-may-1316/
Niki – https://therichnessofasimplelife.wordpress.com/
Shawna and Shareen #LinkYourLife – http://honeyquill.com/
Danny – http://dreambigdreamoften.co/
Carolina – https://yesterdayafter.com/
Vicky – http://www.singlemotherahoy.com/
Pop Down Under – https://amommasview.wordpress.com/
Janice and all the lovely ladies that give us
Friday Blogger’s Pit Stop and Inspire Me Monday –
6. Don’t think if people will: Like it, share it, reblog it, tweet it, agree, disagree, hate you, be a troll under your blogging bridge, or if you’ll end up looking like Mr. Bean with a turkey on your head. Just do what you want to do…that turkey looks good on you.
7. When you don’t have time to prepare a meal, aka a post, or you need some comfort food or a comfort blogging advice post…
8. Sometimes you slave over a hot stove aka computer, plate your hopefully tasty content, and serve it up….you wait for readers to gobble it up, but sometimes they never come to the table, even when called repeatedly. Maybe they’re busy, after all, when they open their email, it’s like a giant buffet has been served up, how much can they possibly eat? Maybe they’ve already eaten or are dining elsewhere. It happens. Try again.
9. Get out there, be a shameless social media self-promoting bloghussy (like me), most of all, enjoy!
Where I’m a complete twit: https://twitter.com/yadadarcyyada
Endlessly baffled by humanity: https://www.facebook.com/yadadarcyyada
The desert where I wander: http://www.pinterest.com/dpark2/
Where I google, not nearly as fun as it sounds: https://plus.google.com/112672588892199127381/posts
10. You can tell someone how to cook or blog, but that doesn’t mean they can do it, or do it like you. Or should. Cook what you want, blog what you want, eat what you want. Taste life.
My best advice about blogging and cooking? Don’t miss the donut by looking through the hole. Dear readers, any favourite blogging tips or recipes you can’t live with or without? Bon Appetit!