Nobody can tell you There’s only one Christmas song worth singing They may try to sell you cause it hangs them up to see someone like you living your own kind of holiday life
But you gotta make your own kind of season Live your own special song Make your own kind of Christmas music even if nobody else sings along!
You might be nowhere this season The loneliest kind of lonely It may be rough going Just to do your thing is the hardest thing to do
So you gotta make your own kind of Christmas music Sing your own special song Make your own kinda season even if nobody else follows along…
Thanks to the holidays, Cass Eliot and all of my readers for the inspiration to be here!!!
The holiday season can be the most wonderful time of the year, but for those without close family or friends (or if they’re far away), for those living in poverty, for people with chronic conditions, and other reasons Christmas can be: discouraging, dismaying, disheartening, and in some cases, dismal. https://yadadarcyyada.com/2015/11/22/how-to-get-away-with-christmas/. Life for too many has become an exercise in survival, with little in the way of comfort and joy. This season and every season I’m focusing on the simple things, the little things, I triple dog dare you to do the same.
So far my “simple” Christmas activities have been: Attending a relaxing and informative Zoom workshop about holiday card-making presented by: Paint It Out (http://paintitout.ca/) featuring artist, Salima Andany (salima@paintitout.ca) and Chronic Not Hopeless (https://www.facebook.com/groups/1875955569247115) – we gladly accept donations chronicnothopeless@gmail.com. When I began painting, thanks to an inspiring class taught by Salima, I only liked acrylics, they just seemed to speak to me, but during this program I heard the voice of watercolours and my art heart grew three sizes that day! For those wishing to spend some time with others with chronic conditions, our Chronic Not Hopeless workshops are accessible, positive, and everyone seems to have fun, what else could you ask for? Oh yeah, they’re free! For those who are interested there will be two more workshops this season, Wednesday December 6th, 2023 at 11am ET: Wreath Making and Wednesday December 13th at 11am ET: Ornament Making. Contact:chronicnothopeless@gmail.comfor free and safe Zoom links, more info, supply list, etc. Hope to see you there and BYOB – Bring Your Own Beverages (no judgment) and most of all, your imagination!
To say the King Edward Choir Christmas concert, “Winter Lights” https://www.kingedwardchoir.ca/ at the Collier Street United Church in Barrie, Ontario (that’s in Canada eh) was a delight would be the maximization of minimizing. It was soaring, never boring! There was singing, our hearts were ringing! Who out there Believes Hot Chocolate Season is the literally most wonderful time of the year? The King Edward Choir must believe because when we boarded the “Polar Express” we heard: “Hot! Hot! Oh, we got it! Hot! Hot! Yo, we got it! Hot chocolate! Here, we’ve only got one rule: Never ever let it cool!”. People who understand my passion for chocolate, including but definitely not limited to hot chocolate understand why this song is near and dear to my heart and stomach…all the year through.
KEC invited us to sing along to wonderful Christmas carols then we listened to many lovely tunes by: Irving Berlin– We may have our love to keep us warm but heading into my first Barriewinter, I’ll also need warm clothes and hot chocolate after digging out of the “Snow, snow, snow, snow!” with my electric shovel as we head toward a hopefully white but not too White Christmas.
There was so more: Tchaikovsky; John Rutter;and they added a very contemporary tune, “I Want To Stare at my Phone Screen With You”, awww, how sweet, I really hope they can keep their 5G holiday romance charged all year long.
In 90 minutes (with intermission) we had ourselves an early Merry Little Christmas(https://yadadarcyyada.com/2021/11/27/have-yourself-a-merry-little-christmas/), with triumph voices rising. My toes were still tapping long after my hands had stopped clapping. Kudos to Leanne Edwards, Artistic Director/Conductor and Katie Pergau, Accompanistand of course the richly melodic women and men of the choir, including my amazing sister-in-law who added her honeyed tones, smiling face, and I saw some dancing/swaying too. If you get a chance to see the King Edward Choir, or other choirs where you live, please do, there’s really something about voices together, raised in song that brings peace and comfort in any season.
You can also join a choir because as we know, “The best way to spread Christmas cheer is singing loud for all to hear.” (Elf).
As luck would have it I entered their raffle (proceeds to the Barrie Food Bank) and I was one of the lucky winners of a very generous (and heavy) basket of goodies: wine; cheese; cookies; coffee; tea; a lovely and warm scarf; a wooden puzzle that’s driving me mad but I’ll get it, I will; many chocolates – I’ll have you know I still have some left, ok, I don’t have any left, but they were divine; etc.
I understand they raised over $1000 for the Food Bank! I certainly left believing in the Spirit of the Season. I’m looking forward to “The Armed Man: A Mass for Peace“ by Welsh composer, Karl Jenkins, which the King Edward Choir will be performing May 4th, 2024 (mark the date and/or look around you, there are activities, in person or online which you can do together or by yourself – I attend all kinds of concerts, plays, travel the world, etc. all from the comfort of my bed!).
Chronic Not Hopeless hosted a virtual Christmas book club, Chronic Page Turners – can you guess what the book selection was for December? “A Christmas Carol” by Charles Dickens. Still a classic. Who’s your favourite character from the book? What’s your favourite film/TV adaptation of this timeless tale of trauma and redemption? https://yadadarcyyada.com/2015/12/11/the-christmas-carol-awakens/
I had to watch “White Christmas”, of course. I don’t wanna wash my hands, my face, or hair in snow and I definitely don’t wanna shovel it, hmm, but snow angels and snowmen are fun. With this much snow you gotta learn to make some snow lemonade from those snow lemons…
“Miracle on 34th Street”(black and white version, so no blue teeth); “Elf”;
I always watch “A Charlie Brown Christmas”with my son on Christmas Day (traditions of any kind can be fun and comforting)…
Bake some cookies, then eat said cookies, alright, alright, eat and share said cookies or swap those cookies (hey you at the cookie swap, don’t be that person)! Play some games: board, card, word, video, computer, whatever, just have fun! Make some candles or apple cider (not in the same pot)! Enjoy the crisp air with a moonlit walk (be safe, be aware of your surroundings, there are some naughty elves out there)!
Snap on those snowshoes (check your local library, you’d be shocked at what their Library of Things has, including snowshoes)! Swish, swish, go cross country skiing! Make some of your decorations and cards – homemade comes from the heart (also dollar, thrift, and craft stores and probably with some cursing involved)! Volunteer, give what you can, including your time! Watch holiday movies/TV shows, including but not limited to: “Die Hard”; “Happy Days”; “Gremlins”; “Gilmore Girls”; “Buffy the Vampire Slayer”; “Bridget Jones’s Diary”; “Downton Abbey”; “Scrooged”; “Seinfeld”; “Tim Burton’s The Nightmare Before Christmas”; “The Golden Girls”; “A Christmas Story”; “Community”; “Lethal Weapon”; “Call The Midwife”; “Batman Returns”; “Murdoch Mysteries”; “It’s a Wonderful Life”;
“ELF”; “M*A*S*H”; “The Holiday”; “National Lampoon’s Christmas Vacation”; “The Santa Clause”; “Meet Me in St. Louis”; “South Park”; “Cast Away”; “Will and Grace”; “The Shop Around The Corner”; “It Came Upon A Midnight Clear”; “The West Wing”; “Rocky IV”; “Black Mirror”; “The Twilight Zone”; “Going My Way”; “March of the Wooden Soldiers”; “Ted Lasso”; “Home Alone” (When are we going to admit Kevin just had bad parents? And thank goodness they were incompetent robbers.);
“Trading Places”; “The Guardians of the Galaxy Christmas Special”;if you can find it, the 1978“Star Wars Holiday Special“; “White Christmas”; “Friends”; any version of “The Nutcracker”(but the Elle Fanning version, well, it’s ‘unique’); “Glee”; “Holiday Inn”; “The Office”; “The Mary Tyler Moore Show”; “Eight Crazy Nights”; “While You Were Sleeping”; “30 Rock”; “Meet John Doe”; “Mad Men”; “Bell, Book and Candle”;
“We’re No Angels”; “Remember the Night”; “Holiday Affair”; “Lost”; “Krampus”; “Black Christmas”; “Pocketful of Miracles”; “The Lion in Winter”; “Anna and the Apocalypse“(nothing says Christmas like a musical romantic comedy with zombies); “I’ll Be Seeing You”; “The X-Files”; “It’s Always Sunny in Philadelphia”; “The Bells of St. Mary’s”; “New Girl”; “Edward Scissorhands”;
Doctor Who Christmas specials; “Reindeer Games”; “Family Guy”; “Mean Girls”; “Santa Claus Conquers the Martians”; “Babes in Toyland”; “My So-Called Life”; “Little Women”; “The Simpsons”; “The Man Who Came to Dinner”;“How i Met Your Mother”;“A Christmas Carol”, so so so many Grinches, Santas, Rudolphs, Peanuts gang, and Scrooges; “Love Actually”; “The Ref”; “Grumpy Cat’s Worst Christmas Ever”;
“The Family Man”; “Bad Santa”; “Christmas in Connecticut”; “Holiday in Handcuffs”(this happened and we let it happen); “Bundle of Joy”; “The Bishop’s Wife”;“Parks and Recreation”; “Crazy Ex-Girlfriend”; “Prancer”;“Bright Eyes”; “Love Finds Andy Hardy “;of course,“Monty Python’s The Meaning of Life”and soooo many more!
Visit someone who may be lonely at this time of year, or anytime! Go caroling! Make a gingerbread house (use royal icing not just icing, I speak from experience, the horror, the horror!)! Go ice skating or watch ice skating! Go out and have a Happy Festivus!
Make your own Advent calendar! Have a potluck dinner with family and/or friends! Have a Christmas pajama day or party! Remember to save money on gifts, food, etc. Knit or at least wear a ‘spirit sweater’ aka ugly sweater or a Ho Ho Ho hat!
Cause it can’t really still be all about the gifts after decades of watching “How The Grinch Stole Christmas”, can it? Can it?
Don’t hurry, don’t scurry, don’t worry. Rest is best in a harried holiday season. What gets done gets done, everything else should be fun. So here, we’ve only got one rule: Never ever let it cool! Hot, hot, hot hot chocolate; find your inner marshmallow and melt into the season.
There’s a lot of division these days, mountains of snowy drama that seem to grow during holidays. Make your kindness like snow, let it float down and around, each little wonder covering hardships, drama, and woe. When you’re worried and you can’t sleep, count your blessings instead of being sheep, and you’ll fall asleep counting your drama-free blessings.
Ever heard ’em say you gotta live like you’re dyin’? I better get on, cause time’s a-flyin’, yeah Lyin’ in my bed at night I’m thinkin’ What if? What if…? Guess it’s not too late This heart is still a-beatin’
Hate livin’ a “woulda shoulda coulda” life. Can’t go back in time, no DeLorean, no TARDIS. Gotta move forward, even through the endless strife. What if, what if, what if is too big a miss.
Maybe I gotta dream a bit bigger Burn a bit brighter Dig a bit deeper Reach a bit further Love a bit harder
Wanna go ahead with no what ifs. Wanna move ahead with no what ifs.
What if…? Those two little words carry soooo much baggage…
Suitcases full of regret.
Carry-ons stuffed with yesterday’s woes.
Trunk of troubles.
Duffel bags filled with heads full of sorrow.
Portmanteau of problems.
Valise of grief.
Chest of contrition.
Gladstone bag of self-reproach.
Attache of shame.
Briefcase of emotional bruises.
Luggage of loss… What if, what if, fillin’ ’em up or toss them out?
Marvel asks the question, “What if…?” each week in their Disney+ series, “What if…?”, reminding us that one choice, one moment can change things forever…
Yet in this “golden” age of social media, instant gratification, and rushing, rushing, rushing (did I mention rushing?), we think less and less about how one moment, one choice can affect us and so many others. We get caught up in being heard, seen, being right, being busy, we forget to stop and think about others. It’s terrifying how little we think of how our choices affect others. Truly terrifying.
We forget the most important rule, do unto others…what you’re saying, what you’re doing affects not only you, but many others.
They say you gotta be brave, you gotta be bold, you gotta be wiser. But what if your bravery is hiding in the closet? What if your boldness is taking an extended vacation? What if your wisdom has been elected Mayor of Dumbtown?
You gotta be hard, you gotta be tough, you gotta be stronger. What if you’re ooey and gooey? What if you’re as flimsy as a politician’s promise? What if you’re as weak as an adorable fluffy kitten without the adorable or fluffy parts?
You gotta be cool, but what if your brain feels like it’s on fire? You gotta be calm, what if your life is an F5 Tornado? You gotta stay together, but what if you’re shattering into a million little pieces?
This month I’m trippin’ down the yellow brick road, tryin’ to find myself a brain, a heart, some courage, and a home. That “home” part may confuse those who know I just moved a couple of months ago. Yes, but sadly some aspects of my new home that would have helped me make an informed decision about moving into this torture chamber apartment, were, er, withheld. One of the biggest withholds, the icing on the crap cake…As of September 1st, new “neighbours”/post-secondary students (though I’ve called the entitled little blanks a whole lot of other names in the past few weeks). I’ve witnessed streaking and public urination…ugh. What else?Fights, extremely loud music (and not the good stuff), lack of social distancing, sharing red plastic cups, cigarettes, bottles…no masks, no brains, no hope. I weep for the future.
I’ve sadly had to cut back the activities of my support group, “Chronic Not Hopeless”, we’re suffering from terrible migraines, lack of sleep, anxiety, and so much more. This isn’t just a nuisance, it’s hurting our health. But what to do? Say F it and live in a shoe?Nope, instead, we’re moving…again.
Instead of finding peace of mind, I’m backed into a corner, talkin’ to myself, cryin’ to myself at night. Filled with regret. Back and forth through my mind. Feelin’ like I lost a cosmic bet. And the feeling coming from my bones says, “Find a home”…
I’ve sadly learned/relearned important lessons.
1) People don’t always tell you everything you need to make an informed decision and that can cost, physically, emotionally and fiscally.
2) This pandemic was never about saving the elderly, flattening the curve, stopping the spread. It was never about masks or vaccines. Lost lives, lost jobs, lost homes, lost health, so much loss. All the sacrifice. All the heartache. All the trauma. All so people could party.
When the world smashes down on you…When people lie to you, how do you believe again? What if we all just treated each other with decency? What if we thought about others? What if instead of arguing about masks, vaccines, race, religion, medications, elections (broken systems), celebrities, and so much more, why not agree to disagree and try to make life better instead of so much worse?
This blog post inspired by some of my usual things, aka: chocolate; family; friends; music – my mind is simply a never-ending playlist; tea, hot chocolate, tea and more tea; romance novels, mystery novels, any kind of novels and non-fiction, ok, let’s be honest, I’d read the side of a cereal box – me likey words!);“The Walking Dead”, “Fear The Walking Dead”, “The Walking Dead: World Beyond”(I sense a pattern here but what oh what could it be?); sooo many documentaries;“Murder She Baked”, er and Wrote;“Mystery 101”; “McDonald and Dodds”; computers…anyone looking forward to the new“Downton Abbey”movie? And added to my unusual brainwaves:
Marvel’s “What If…?”, of course; “Only Murders in the Building” (Star/Disney+)- if you enjoy a good mystery, this one is full of “what ifs” and “whodunits” – enjoyable performances by Steve Martin, Martin Short, Selena Gomez with guest appearances by Sting and Tina Fey; entitled brats; kindness (we need more, more, more); hidden traps; rain (what if we blame it on the rain?); pumpkins;
And yet more, um, stimulus? Matthew West; Des’ree; Queen, White Stripes;“Cruella” (Emma Stone and Emma Thompson are awesome but the movie itself, sigh, way too long, probably like this post);
What else inspired this post besides emptying my brain, er, I mean, “ER”…Generally really good, lots of great starsand would-be stars.
And I might be wrong but I think maybe I could do some mediciney-type stuff now, it seems to mostly involve saying things like: “Get me a crash cart!”,“Crits are down!”, “Are you my appendix? Because I feel like I should take you out.”, “Pulse ox is stable!”, “Coding” (so much coding), “I should take your temperature because you’re looking really hot!”, “I’d specialize in you anyday…”, “She’s getting tachy!” (or was that Real Housewives?), “You look a little down, maybe you need a a shot of Vitamin ME!”, “I can’t wait to sleep cause ICU in my dreams every night”, ok, wait, most of those are just me thinking of George Clooney, Noah Wyle and Goran Višnjić, umm, gulp, nevermind;
And still more… “Roswell: New Mexico”; “Secrets of Skinwalker Ranch”; and wow, “The Suicide Squad” – 2021, with the help of James Gunn, DC finally got it right. “The Suicide Squad” is an R-rated cousin of The Guardians of the Galaxy, um, on crack? Margot Robbie rules as Harley Quinn aka Daddy’s Little Monster with fun/surreal bits from: Nathan Fillion, Peter Capaldi, John Cena, Sylvester Stallone (“Nom nom?”), Pete Davidson, Idris Elba, Daniela Melchior, Michael Rooker, David Dastmalchian, Taika Waititi, Sean Gunn, and the weasel (also Sean Gunn).
And of course, what always inspires, ice cream, way too much ice cream (is that a thing, way too much ice cream?);
Some other things that wandered into my life… “Midnight Mass” (Netflix) –Mike Flanagan nods to Stephen King – in a “what if” wonderful mind mess, with a great soundtrack. “Midnight Mass”, “Haunting of Hill House”, “Haunting of Bly Manor”, “Hush“, etc., hmmm, I wonder if being born in Salem, Massachusetts influenced Flanagan to create and direct his horrors...
I took another bite out of the “Santa Clarita Diet”; thankful Drew Barrymore and Timothy Olyphant make the undead so delightfully delicious.
And cookies, they never fail to motivate me, how about you?
I like to think people, books, TV shows, movies, etc. come upon you not when you need them, but when you can find something in them you need. For me, “The Starling” contained this message: some things are out of our control. I knew this, of course I knew this, yet sometimes I need to be reminded of certain things. Melissa McCarthy, Chris O’Dowd, Kevin Kline, Timothy Olyphant, Daveed Diggs, Skylar Gisondo, Loretta Devine don’t disappoint in this intense, with moments of levity, but to be sure, intense, dramedy. The subject matter, grief, is a very personal and should be treated with care. Why not treat everyone with care?
My biggest inspiraton? Autumn/Fall, my favourite season: Halloween, Thanksgiving, pumpkins (except pumpkin spice, I’m gonna say it, don’t like it, can we still be friends? I support your pumpkin spice love, if that helps); the crisp air and even crisper apples; the gorgeous ever-changing leaf show; soft sweaters; softer throw blankets; comfortable walks…
OK, OK, I see what’s happening here (I really don’t see what’s happening anywhere these days and don’t think I want to). You’re screen to screen with mediocrity, and it’s strange. You don’t even know how you feel (or if you should feel, oh gosh, so many feels…) It’s adorkable! Well, it’s “nice” to see/hear humans never change.
It’s been awhile, let’s begin. Yes, it’s really me! I’m back (does this feel like a pattern?). Breathe it in (through a damn mask) I know, it’s a lot… The snark, the jokes, gifs, memes, (all which may or may not hit the mark) I’m just an ordinary blogging universal life force
“Marvel”, “The Munsters”, and Midway” (Ed Skrein, Woody Harrelson, Luke Evans, Mandy Moore and many more, wow, imagine if they’d had social media like Facebook, Pinterest, Twitter, TikTok, QQ, Viber, reddit, WhatsApp, WeChat…and war).
“Sanditon”, “Shetland” (needs 10 seasons, minimum), Stephen Colbert who’s still owning his COVID hair, “Psych” (oops, well, sounds like it starts with an “s”; I’ve heard it both ways), and “Snowpiercer” (These are our revolutions).
Thanks cartoons like: “Rick and Morty”, “Family Guy”, “South Park” “Justice League” (animated series)…not the “other” (shudder), etc.
“Julie and the Phantoms” (“Julie e os Fantasmas“).
Jimmy Fallon (I just feel there’s a lack of Paul Rudd on this show lol).
“Hamilton” (what would we do without Lin-Manuel Miranda? I don’t even want to think about it).
Thanks for even the thought of“Enola Holmes” and “Utopia” (can’t wait!).
Thanks to “Gilmore Girls”, though I’m trying not to indulge again, like a comfort food, but how about “The Golden Girls”, hey Netflix, I’m pitching you a new series, “Golden Gilmore Girls” with older Lorelei, Rory, Sookie, and Lane living in Florida?It’s gonna be a hit!
Well, come to think of it, Readers, honestly I could go on and on I could explain every unnatural phenomenon (https://yadadarcyyada.com/2017/10/26/my-big-fat-supernatural-life/) The sass, the grass, the colours, the vague meandering chats (books, movies, politics, TV shows and other shtick, it’s all about the laughs) before again going underground. Honestly, that was me just messing around…
I’ve murdered my blog, I’ve buried its guts, while trying to figure out what the heck is going on, it’s all coconuts!
What’s the lesson? What is the take-away? Be kind to everyone every single day!!! And the tapestry here on my blog Is simply sayin’, Don’t be trippin’ dawg!
Look where I’ve been (mostly home). NO, I haven’t been out of the country in 14 days (does YouTube count?). How the heck would I know if I’ve ever been in contact with anyone with COVID-19? This is a weird way to screen…for anything. Asking us, asking us, asking us, asking us, do you have: Fever•New onset of cough•Worsening chronic cough •Shortness of breath (sometimes, when watching Jason Momoa, does that count?)•Difficulty breathing•Sore throat•Difficulty swallowing (don’t say it out loud, that’s what she said)•Decrease of loss of sense, of taste, or smell•Chills (They’re multiplying; it’s electrifying!)•Headaches•Unexplained fatigue/malaise/muscle aches•Nausea/vomiting, diarrhea, abdominal pain (Have you seen the news/internet? If you don’t have these symptoms you’re not paying attention)•Pink eye/conjunctivitis (gross)•Runny nose or nasal congestion without other known cause (like what?)…Why make people do that whole spiel? Seriously. Why not have a digital tickety-tappin’ done by Lin-Manuel Miranda rippity-rappin’? (Ha ha ha ha ha ha, hey)And, did you Wash your hands? Seriously, before, during and after COVID, wash them!!!
So here’s the thing, every day now seems like a horror movie, full of: ghouls, fools, viruses, monsters, unknown terrors, people unable to follow simple instructions (very simple, i.e. arrows, a sign that says, “keep right”, etc.).
COVIDIOTS would probably check the dark basement if they heard a noise, or would start filming an alien ship scooping up humans, or hug a demon, freshly spawned from the bowels of Hell. I would not be at all surprised. Oh look, a guy with an chainsaw, he seems friendly! https://yadadarcyyada.com/2014/03/20/25-ways-to-stay-alive-in-a-horror-movie/
What else?My love is trying to rekindle our affair, trying to lure me back into a comfy reclining chair…with Dune (and chill?). – I keep trying to get away from movie theaters, but they keep trying to pull me back in! Perfect for Autumn, amazing cast, but since people can’t even follow arrows in stores, or signs, or instructions (even physcial distancing) – could you trust them in theaters?!? COVID fatigue? Ha! https://yadadarcyyada.com/2019/09/18/head-over-heels/ Just the latest excuse for bad behaviour https://yadadarcyyada.com/2016/09/16/you-had-me-at-cake/More like people-want-to-do-whatever-they-want-to-do https://yadadarcyyada.com/2013/08/29/the-pursuit-of-happiness-cult/. They don’t care…about you (or anyone, including themselves https://yadadarcyyada.com/2016/05/25/crapathy/ they just want to go back to doing whatever they want to do). Really, in this supernatural, so-much-cooler-finally-Fall https://yadadarcyyada.com/2016/10/14/the-glorious-chaos/ time, you’d think PPE, you know, mitigation practices, ya know, simple stuff like: hand sanitizer, masks, gloves, face shields, etc. would be the most precious things in the universe, but seems the pumpkin spice still wins….The spice extends life. The spice expands consciousness. The spice is vital to survival. I’m going to be honest, here goes, brace yourselves, I don’t like pumpkin spice, there I said it.Yet the pumpkin spice must flowhttps://yadadarcyyada.com/2015/10/09/you-may-say-im-a-dreamer/
Oh, I’m burnin’ through the sky, yeah. Two hundred degrees. That’s why they call me Ms. Fahrenheit. Don’t stop me now, I’m having such a good time I’m having a ball. Don’t stop me now… I don’t want to stop at all.Can’t see the point pretending everything’s alright
But why wallow and wail,
to no avail?
It is as it was
good versus evil
in a supersonic battle
heating up
lovers gonna love
haters gonna hate
others don’t give a dot dot dot
I’m happy
super-sappy
angry
hangry
lonely
overwhelmed
afraid
defiant
confused… Nothing stopped me having a good time, seeing them all Reduced rate and 2 for 1 movies?!? The show must go on!Neither snow nor freezing rain stays this blogger, forget The Oscars, Golden Globes, SAG, buckle up, here’s mine…
Glass. Best of trilogy. No spoilers, Bruce Willis (still got it); Samuel L Jackson (keeps rolling); James McAvoy (D.I.D. well; abuse shatters). More?
Bohemian Rhapsody.Smiling, foot-tapping then small sniffly soon joined by big hot blobs no tissues could contain. Every Queen song a bubble/rubble of memories. Happy/sad/joyous/heartbroken/healing/ripping/jarring/hopeful/ lonely/rapturous. Climb the highest peak; plunge the deepest pit. Explosions of memories. Haven’t discovered the wonder of Rami Malek? Please do. I almost forgot what Freddie Mercury looked like, Malek is that good…as for the Bryan Singer controversy, tip of the melting iceberg, that can of worms is wide open.
Aquaman. (Twice – there’s something to be said for stamina).
Jason Momoa? Can’t tell you everything I was thinking, but he was magnificent. Oceans of action, comedy, sentiment, and messaging (destroying the planet we profess to love). Hmm, Hollywood, money where your movie mouth is – wealth should be shared with those in need and to fix up our world.
Don’t stop me now (’cause I’m having a good time) Don’t stop me now (yes, I’m havin’ a good time) I don’t want to stop at all…
If I should stay
I hope I won’t
be in your way
So I might stay or
I might go,
but I know
I’ll think of you
every step
of the way
And I will always love you
I will always blog love you
Mostly sweet memories Is all I’d take with me No more goodbyes No outcries We both know you have all you need And I will always love you I will always blog love you
I hope life treats you kind And I hope you have all you’ve dreamed of And I wish to you joy and happiness But above all this, I wish you love.
And I will always love you… even if you don’t agree with my beliefs, we don’t have to believe the same things to be friends, to find common ground, to wish each other well, and to support each other, because as humans, we’re all in this together.
I will always love you…even if you don’t agree with my politics. I’ll still say my piece, why is everyone arguing? We don’t need to agree on everything, we just need to believe simple things,
Lying is still lying, truth is still truth, spinning just makes your head spin…do we sometimes listen to lies because it’s easier, what those lies offer is easier? The truth is hard, we think we can’t handle the truth.
We all want someone to look at us the way some of us look at: cake, steak, cookies, wine, bacon, beer, coffee, pizza, or anything that has the word, chocolate in it – how do you know if chocolate really loves you, when it’s an all-consuming love.
Even if you have to sing the alphabet song in your head when doing things, you’re still adulting just with help from your inner child.
Slavery was not a choice, Kanye West (being ignorant is a choice, clearly).
We wish everything was as easy as getting fat (it isn’t).
When you’re screwing something (mind out of the gutter, I’m talking IKEA and handyperson type things), it’s easier (at least for me), lefty loosey, tighty righty.
Learning to love, and learning to love learning, those are the greatest loves of all.
Our brains and hearts are like the TARDIS in Doctor Who, bigger on the inside.
The Universe isn’t telling you anything, it has better things to do – and we rarely make the right choice when you’re already looking for someone to blame or praise for that choice.
Technology is cool, it’s not people, TV, movies (yes, like “Marvel’s Avengers Infinity War”) are cool, they’re not real people…
The world would be a better place if everyone felt safe – safe from rape, murder, torture, scams, lies, and they’d feel safe if everyone had affordable housing, enough to eat, an education, help when they need it – it’s not a Utopian dream, it’s more than possible, we just need to stop subsidizing the rich – funny how they say they believe in Capitalism and believe Socialism is ‘evil’ yet the rich always have their hands out for subsidies. https://yadadarcyyada.com/2015/08/16/everybody-wants-to-rule-the-world/
What we think of as rights are actually leased privileges, they can be repossessed any time. https://yadadarcyyada.com/2016/09/16/you-had-me-at-cake/And I could go on and on (but who would read it with WordPress and the lack of notification of posts, sigh, so bored), but what’s the point, change your expectations and be happy, life’s too short not to be.
Many books, songs, art, TV programs, and movies question whether we’re real, what is real. Hunger Games, “Real or not real?” and in Westworld, “What is real?”.
The overly simple, but perfect answer was, “That which is irreplaceable.”. Good people are irreplaceable. Good times are irreplaceable. Literature, music, art, TV/Movies – those that change you, move you, touch you, elevate you from surviving to thriving is irreplaceable, but generally, stuff is replaceable, or unnecessary. Truth is irreplaceable.I will always love you…even if you don’t Like and share my posts (please Like and share my posts).I will always love you…even if odds are you won’t always be on my side or ever by my side, we’re still together.I will always love you…even, to paraphrase Maya Angelou, I forget what you said, what you did, I’ll always remember how you made me feel. https://yadadarcyyada.com/2018/04/15/tra-la-la-tra-la-la-la/I will always blog love you because I’ve learned so much from blogging, my readers, and fellow bloggers. https://yadadarcyyada.com/2015/04/10/im-hooked-on-a-feeling/https://yadadarcyyada.com/2015/08/27/message-in-a-bottle/https://yadadarcyyada.com/2017/02/02/theres-no-crying-in-blogging/
When this song was first written by Dolly Parton in 1973, yes, 45 years ago, it was a love song, not romantic, a goodbye song for Parton’s professional break-up with her mentor, producer, and longtime duet partner, Porter Wagoner. It’s been sung by everyone, from Kenny Rogers (when he looked like Kenny Rogers, why do people do cosmetic surgery, https://yadadarcyyada.com/2015/04/05/its-not-the-years-honey-its-the-mileage/ – own those wrinkles – they pay their rent in experiences, memories, days, weeks, months, years of being you https://yadadarcyyada.com/2015/10/03/sweet-dreams-are-made-of-this/), Linda Ronstadt, and little known singer in a little known movie, I think it called something like, “The Bodyguard”, with Whitney Houston and Kevin Costner? (“Are you pondering what I’m pondering, Pinky? “Well, I think so, hiccup, but Kevin Costner with an English accent?”https://yadadarcyyada.com/2014/01/30/pinky-the-brain/). I don’t think any really beat Dolly’s version, but the song is an earworm, which, like blogging, once in your head, rarely leaves.
Humans are capable of greatness, but too often it’s just us saying we’re great. With all reverence, I’ll paraphrase the magnificent R.E.M.: In the eye of a hurricane, feeling your insides churning as you hear the pain. Bored of people only mis-serving, wanting to believe, can’t perceive their own needs.
Change the world, stop being fed up, instead follow through and follow-up. Shriek after shriek, holler after holler, anyone will do anything to worship at the dollar, Bumbling, stumbling, perfectly baffled, trumped…
Tethered, biased on all sides, “winning” in a tournament of lies; chopped, cropped, plopped in front of another scream, another screen…
Another moment too obscene. Vitriolic, patriotic, slam fight, bright light. Feel like turning it all off and only watching Psych (you know that’s right)
It’s the end of the world as we know it (had some time alone). It’s the end of the world as we know it (in a media cone). It’s once again the end of the world as we know it…and I feel behind.
It’s been a stuffy, screeching, spooky, sweltering summer abundant with the bafflings of humanity and nature alike. Here I am, an oldening woman who blogs alone in a skiff in the Blog Stream trying to find the ‘best words’ and had gone sixty odd days now without blogging a post. Whether I shall turn out to be the heroine of my own life, or whether that prodigious station will be held by anybody else, these pages must show.
It is a truth universally acknowledged that a blogger, despite being in a break, cannot in good conscience ignore her blog birthday, a wonderful opportunity to thank her dear readers, who stick with her through ups and downs and even the not hanging around. Some years ago – never mind how long precisely (ok, Summer 2013) – having little or no money in my purse, and nothing particular to interest me on TV, I thought to blog about a little and see the bloggery part of the world.
It was the best of times. It was the worst of times. At any given time it can seem like the worst of times, but is it? There’s no world war. No Inquisition. No Ice Age. No plague. No killer bees. No asteroids hurdling toward the Earth (no worries, Bruce Willis will save us anyway).
No hoards, Attila the Hun, saber tooth tigers, or Genghis Khan. No cannibal galaxies hungering for galactic flesh (not to be confused with cannabis galaxies hungering for galactic munchies). No cat overlords, er, well, maybe a few cat overlords. No alien invaders (although there is that signal from HD164595, no worries, Will Smith will save us).
Last I checked, no zombie apocalypse, unless you count the overabundance of movies/TV shows about zombies and of course, smartphone users.
That’s not to say everything is wonderful. How could we not have problems? Over seven billion humans trying to coexist with each other, as well as animals, insects, fish, birds, and of course, Bigfoot, The Loch Ness Monster (Hi Nessie!), Yeti, elves, golems, El Chupacabra, dragons, Kala Bandar, vampires, werewolves, and all manner of magical beasts.
I don’t know about you, dear readers, but I struggle with first impressions. My instincts, often right, are second, third and fiftieth guessed. As I get older, I’m trying to listen to those first instincts; Maya Angelou was so right, “When someone shows you who they are believe them; the first time.”
It’s sooooo easy to sit around a kitchen, coffee shop, newsroom, living-room, bar, boardroom, online and fix all the world’s problems, but as Edward R. Murrow warned us: “Just because your voice reaches halfway around the world doesn’t mean you are wiser than when it reached only to the end of the bar.”
Cooking competitions, game shows, reality shows, sports – all answers are easy unless you’re actually doing it.
Lies are seductive, there’s no need to prove them, they just float out there in our new Fact-Free World. WTF (What The Fact).
Options? Just believe what we want to believe because we like who says it or how they say it. Forget the facts, it’s all about the feels. We feel like something is true, so now it is. I feel like I’m watching The Blair Witch Projectinstead of an election and as we know, what we feel is more important than the facts.
The biggest feels, fear…but if Star Wars and Yoda have taught us anything, it’s this, “Fear is the path to the dark side. Fear leads to anger. Anger leads to hate. Hate leads to suffering.”
And it’s been announced Trump is going to write, direct, and star in the next Star Wars film, Star Wars VIII: Make The Empire Great Again.
Oh la la Politics and the Public, seems like a Bad Romance. Elections, like watching children scuffle over a toy in a sandbox, caring less about the toy itself, but the prize of winning it. Divisive politics, like passing gas, it sure feels good, a relief to get it out there. Then what? The stench, the disgust of others…Passing gas is a necessity of life, although the reasons for more gas can be avoided.
I don’t like gossip, rumour, innuendo, speculation, tittle-tattle, lies, hyberbole. I like facts. I miss when the news was news, actual facts and events, not just guesses, conjecture, speculation, and supposition. Taglines, soundbites, and slogans – more important than substance, service, and civility; mocking has become an acceptable form of communication…
Blindly following anyone or anything, without questioning, doubting, challenging, like it or not, no matter what you call it, you’re in a cult…or a mob…or a joke.
When I paused my blogging I felt so far behind I didn’t even know who shot J.R…yes, that far behind!
Now I feel a little better, more caught up. I’ve been writing a book, well, an outline and a chapter. I’ve been reading. Resting. Visiting. Appointmenting. Decompressing. Researching. Regenerating.
Sadly, I was viciously attacked by migraines, but some downtime hooked up to an IV gave me time for deep thought…just kidding, I was thinking the doctor, McDreamy might fall in love with me, Grey’s Anatomy style (preferably with less whining). Also thinking a hospital would be a bad place to be during a zombie outbreak, but with a lot of potential weapons. I also wrote this post in my head, so it might be a bit scatty. Revisiting aspects of my life, including my wardrobe, still going for comfortable, but maybe hobochic. What do you think, dear readers?
What else have I been up to? Planning. Playing. Re-watching a few things, the newer Battlestar Galactica (So Say We All) and Warehouse 13 – thank you dear Teagan https://teagansbooks.com/ for making me want to revisit The Warehouse; I’m always happy there. It reminds me that the biggest adventure, is life itself, and that the spirit of The Warehouse is inside us all, the spirit of endless wonder.
I even know who Gossip Girl is (I’ll never tell xo xo). Caught up on John Oliver back despite popular demand, funny and truth, can’t get enough of that. Almost lapsed into a cheesy made-for-TV movie coma with never-to-be classics such as but not limited to: TV adaptations of Joanne Fluke’s Hannah Swensen murder mysteries https://yadadarcyyada.com/2016/05/25/crapathy/Murder, She Baked (where ex-soap stars drop by for a cookie break; Cookie Monster should make a guest appearance!).
I know my heart was heavy and uplifted as The Tragically Hip sang a very public goodbye, a final gift of music to everyone they love: fans, band members, family, friends, hometown of Kingston, Ontario and Canada…I alternated between singing and crying, sometimes both at the same time.
I know I’m thankful to everyone who continues to support my blog – my wonderful readers, fellow bloggers, also, the lovely ladies at #BloggersPitStop for all the support. I know I’m grateful you could stop by for my belated blog birthday bash. Enjoy the party games – watch out, you don’t know what will be pinned where these days!!! Enjoy the virtual cake (as always, you have me at cake) – even chocolate has no calories!
Feel free to visit, we’ll pretend we’re under the sea in an octopus’s garden – that’s where I’d like to be, under the sea, in an octopus’s garden in the shade.
So maybe the best words are…please, be kind, what the hell do you have to lose?
Is this the real life? Is this just fantasy? Caught in a landslide, No escape from reality. Open your eyes, Look up to the skies and see… I’m just a poor girl, I need no sympathy, Because I’m easy come, easy go, Little high, little low, Anyway the wind blows, does kinda matter to me…
If you didn’t headbang to that (preferably in a car with friends), I got nothing…
I’m back, it’s been a rough week or so, including, unfortunately, me being back to my usual sleeping issues – I see why they use lack of sleep as a torture method. Life, you spin me round (like a record). On the bright side, no bail money needed, no visiting the hardware store for: lye, tarps, a shovel, and I discovered I can still discover stuff about myself and others.
I recently got new eyeglasses, progressive ones, a nice word for you’re old, deal with it. Getting old doesn’t bother me, it’s like watching time-lapse photos of myself decaying. Who doesn’t love arthritis, wrinkles, age spots, forgetfulness – what was I talking about? It could be an adjustment thing, but I find myself spending less time online, more in the real world…whatever that means.
Also channeling my inner Popeye, yup, I am what I am with a spinach binge (even spinach tea), which in turn caused St. Patrick’s Day to come early, if you know what I mean…and no one was after those lucky charms, no pot of gold at the end of that rainbow. Enough said.
I see The Bacheloris back, can someone explain this twisted take on Dunbar’s Number? To me, the concept is flawed, if I wanted to date a guy who was dating like 25 other women I would have just stayed in the music scene. And yes, I had to use the Blake Shelton parody (Farm Hunk) from SNL…you’re welcome.
Speaking of reality shows, what’s with that new one, Pumpkin For Prez? Why do we want to watch a caustic, racist, sexist, grandiloquent pumpkin trying to become POTUS? Though funny, it’s on way too often.
I could have done without the white Bronco flashback, do we really have to relive the O.J. Simpson trial? Couldn’t we just assume the LAPD still have evidence impotence? Perhaps Disney and Pixar could cash in on this O.J. stuff to promote Finding Dory. I can picture the trailer now: “Knife? I saw a knife!”. Or the chance for Paul Hogan to revive the nostalgia of his Crocodile Dundee films: “That’s not a knife…this is a knife!”.
The older I get the more I feel like a charlatan, a flim-flam artist, fraud, poser, pretending to be an adult when all I really want is to run through a field with a kite, only stopping long enough to blow bubbles and count how long it takes them to burst. I’m sick of paperwork. Up to here with paying bills, errands, taxes, phone calls, being on hold, decisions, balancing budgets…I’m queasy from being bombarded, sold stuff, even during TV, movies, books, etc. Product placement I understand, but I watch TV/movies, and read books to be distracted, entertained, having actors ad-roofie me to push it, push it real good for: Segway, cereal, Coke (not the real anything), Apple, Microsoft, fast food, junk food, candy, a car that parallel parks itself (would love that car, by the way), well, takes me out of my enjoyment zone. Instead, I want to tear off my adult costume and spend hours watching tadpoles in a stream. Go barefoot. No matter our age, whether you’re online or not, Adam Lindsay Gordon got it right: “Life is mostly froth and bubble, Two things stand like stone. Kindness in another’s trouble, Courage in your own”…I guess I’ll bravely, kindly continue adulting.
I think I have a slow learning curve, who knows, but I find I don’t mind, I actually like the learning part. Doing the same thing over and over and expecting different results isn’t insanity, it’s living. So life, take on me, take me on, I’ll be yours if…
Dear Readers, how are you today? Happy, I hope.
Lately I’ve been in a shall we say, reflective mood, thinking of the highs and lows, cons and pros of being human.
I know, like so many things, it’s complicated.
Let’s start with the Pros:
1. We’re amusing.
I never understand why people go to the zoo when they can watch people instead, such as, on public transit. In one ride I saw: a guy with a bag full of copper wires sucking down a giant blue slurpee who collected paper transfers from the bus floor, tore two apart, licked them, put them together then showed ‘it’ to the driver; another guy was reading a scientific magazine, upside down; a photoshopped woman talking loudly and graphically about her knotty/naughty love life via cellphone; an older gentleman wearing PJs, cool, I did that too, in high school, the top one day, bottoms another, but as I get older I just think, sure, that looks comfy, you could get off the bus and right into bed. Who needs The Oscars? Hop on a bus, be awarded.
2. We’re ingenious.
Really, we came up with all kinds of stuff, like: flying, fire, medicine, books, family, duct tape, technology, chocolate, the internet, music, blogging, swimming inside in the winter, batteries, politicians, money, cake, saunas, friendships, trains, Johnny Depp as a pirate, pool noodle under fitted sheet so a child doesn’t roll out of bed (wish I’d known this when my son was young), driving, driving with dogs on our laps, wait, someone needs to explain this one to me, does the dog think he’s driving, does he even comprehend what driving is, I doubt he passed a driving test, I mean, how did he fill out all the forms, reach the pedals with his paws, not bite the instructor?
3. We’re endlessly curious.
We ask questions such as, but not limited to: “How bad can it be?” (very bad); “Could it get any worse?” (yes); “How stupid can you be?” (have you heard some politicians?).
4. We’re brave.
We live on a planet where the earth shakes, volcanoes spew lava, mountains of snow grow, and storms make us remember there’s no place like home…and then invite tourists, cause it’s that awesome.
5. We fall in love and out of love.
Love can go from oh’s to ex’s…ex’s to oh’s or so I’ve heard…at least, in song. Our hearts can stay, stray, delay, relay, live to love another day. Don’t think my ex’s or oh’s haunt me, but I’d like to think someday my Prince Charming will ride in on his baggage cart and sweep me into his manly arms, yes, apparently in my flight of fancy I’m dainty and light as a feather, his bronzed flesh glowing, huh, glowing? Too much of the X-Files reboot? But I digress…he’ll have room on his baggage cart for my baggage too and we’ll be off, into the sunset (Risky Business-style sunglasses firmly in place), hopefully not ending up like Thelma and Louise, Romeo and Juliet, or Butch and Sundance…
6. We yearn.
For more, for other worlds and explore them through books, movies, TV…finally saw Star Wars The Force Awakens aka A-New-Hope-revisited when I took my son to a movie marathon for his birthday. It was great, but I have to wonder, what is it with people dropping children off on desert planets? Do they think it’s desert daycare? Do they think the children might go all Home Alone on the scum of these wretched hives of villainy? At what point should we just admit they’re bad parents?
7. We all want to be heroes or funny anti-heroes.
Yeah, I saw Deadpooland laughed so hard my sides hurt. I’m having a bit of a Ryan Reynolds week (how often can you say that?), saw Woman In Gold too, how does Helen Mirren do it? But we don’t have to wear a cape, or a mask, have mutant powers, or fancy gadgets…just be good to one another. But if you get a chance to be be Batman and drive the Batmobile, do that too. Kindness is true heroics.
The Cons? Maybe another time, or…all of the above? Anything you want to add?
Seeing is believing,
or is it believing is seeing?
Or not seeing is believing?
I’m confused.
There are things we can’t see that we believe in, and things we can’t see we don’t believe in. How do we choose? I can’t see atoms, air, sunshine, germs, Wi-Fi, magic, ghosts, hope, despair, Santa, love, hate, vampires, cancer, pain, mental illness, God, aliens, pain, good, evil, a cat’s purr, microwaves, pollution, carbon monoxide, autism, a baby’s breath…
Should we assume none of these are real?
I can feel the sunshine on my skin, hear a cat’s purr, use the internet, witness the horror of cancer…Geez, at this point, I’m held together with the duct tape of atoms and hope. If those things are real without being seen, why not the others? It’s not the same in blogging, we have to be seen. But how?
1. You know those little bubbles in carbonated drinks, all fizzy, tickling the nose, and expanding the stomach? That’s blogging. It can be effervescent, pleasing, irritating, confounding, overwhelming, addictive. And while most of us don’t want to expand our stomachs, we do want to expand our readership. If you’re just doing it for yourself, that’s great, but then why do it online, why not in a journal or diary?
2. Don’t fixate on number of views. Blog as often as you and your readers enjoy. Do it for the fun of it, for money (stupid question, money is a necessary evil), fame, a book deal, movie deal (I just had an image of who might portray me in the movie of my life, Helena Bonham Carter? No, probably Mindy Cohn).
3. The internet is a giant virtual haystack and yes, in this analogy, you are the needle, I am the needle, more specifically, our blogs are the needles. Shift around the haystack – you can’t expect to just ‘be found’, or find others.
Look for blog parties/linky parties/blog shares… Jason – https://aopinionatedman.com/ Janice – http://mostlyblogging.com/ Danny – http://dreambigdreamoften.co/ Elena – http://www.livingwithbatman.com/ Vicky – http://www.singlemotherahoy.com/ April – https://diapersandtutus.wordpress.com/ And more. Read, share, like, comment. And blog engagement groups/boards are rampant on Facebook and Pinterest. Twitter is overflowing with hashtag days (Suziehttps://suzie81speaks.com/ gets us trending every Sunday with #SundayBlogShare – the lovely ladies at http://honeyquill.com/ give us #LinkYourLife – there’s also #MondayBlogs #TuesdayShares#wwwblogs #BeWoW #bluskyfriday #ArchiveDay #WeekendBlogShare). Don’t just attend, participate.
5. Your readers won’t always ‘get’ what you’re blogging about or agree. Some will be disinterested, some downright rude…Keep wandering through the blogging desert (or dessert) and you’ll find the awesome ones, astounding ones, generous ones, hopeful ones, ones that inspire, ignite, and make you overjoyed you ever heard the term, blogging.
6. Blogging is about being part of something, otherwise you’d just sit alone typing…and we’ve seen the movies – that can either lead to a bestseller…or murder.
As a young child I believed many things, if I watched a movie again the ending might change, or the money I put in the bank would be the exact same money I’d get out…my Mom, who worked at the credit union at the time had the delightful task of teaching me this life lesson when I wanted my ‘lucky’ quarter from my account. Oops.
Now, older, wiser, I may not believe what I used to believe, or have to see to believe; I may not always know what to believe, but I still want to believe. What about you?
As a writer I have to believe words have power. One of the words I dislike is hate (note I didn’t say I hated hate). It’s overused. People hate their life. Family. Weight. Home. Car. Cats (maybe they sense your hate). Government. Politicians. Job. Hair. Cake (you are so reading the wrong blog). Books. TV shows. Songs. Actors. Movies. Vegetables (how do you hate something plant-based?).
I’m tired of hearing people say they hate…I’m not sure they know what that word means. Hate should be reserved for really, really bad people and things, like: child abusers, rapists, murderers, Hitler, warlords, dictators, alien overlords, stuff like that.
1. Let’s review, do you really hate your life or just certain aspects? Your whole life is a big category with many moving parts, pick the right part to hate, let the rest roll on.
2. Standing in the middle of a room silently or loudly screaming, “I hate my life” or “no No NOOOO!” repeatedly will probably make you feel slightly better for about 30 seconds, but it’s not a long-term ‘fix’.
3. This is usually the point when advice-giver types tell you to change your life. That’s all well and good, but what if some things are beyond your ability to change? Should you just accept them, or rail against them, lay down and kick and scream until you feel better, or until someone offers you ice cream to stop, or threatens to call the authorities (and no ice cream)?
4. How much time do you spend each day ‘hating your life’, I suggest you cut that in half, help others with the other half, you’ll feel the hate drift away.
5. Take a deep breath. This probably won’t help you hate your life less, but hopefully you might get a nice breath of fresh air, or the smell of fresh-baked goods.
6. Do something, maybe something different, or something to help someone else, again, may not make your life full of singing and woodland creatures doing your housework, but it might remind you of the good things.
7. Take charge of your life, unless you wouldn’t feel comfortable having you in charge, after all, do you even remember where your keys, or the remote is right now?
8. Are you at least changing the things you hate about your life? You’d hate to get stuck in a rut of hating the same things for decades.
9. Check your birth certificate. Are you old enough to hate your life? There are some weird laws out there, you don’t want to be breaking any.
10. Write down what you hate, maybe there’s a great book, or movie or TV show, song, etc. in all that hate. As much as people say they love positivity, so many popular shows, movies, books, plays, songs, etc. are about dysfunction, hate, crime, death, destruction, apocalyptic worlds, and misery, including Misery.
Maybe the haters just need a nap. A nap always makes you feel better. I’ve been enjoying a tiny bit more sleep (even when awake) in the past week (new meds).
Fibromyalgia and sleep don’t get along, but as much as I can hate the pain it inflicts on me 24/7, the constant fatigue, feeling left out of life sometimes, there’s no point, it is what it is. I have a choice, I can choose hate and be all grumpypants, or I can choose love and keep enjoying what I have and hoping for better days ahead.
If I said anything wonky during my blog party https://yadadarcyyada.com/2016/01/29/always-on-my-mind-blog-party/ (still open by the way, drop by anytime and promote your blog, for free, yes, free – we hear that word often, but it’s rarely true, in this case, it is) – I’ll blame it on the drugs (totally legal ones). Thanks to all those who came out. Happily, my bed and I are back on speaking terms, for now, and we didn’t even need sleep counseling.
Haters gonna hate, so let’s bake them a cake…seriously, who can hate when eating cake?
Be brave. Be bold. Choose love…and naps…and cake (not necessarily in that order).
Also known as Takotsubo Cardiomyopathy (not to be confused with the Kobayashi Maru from Star Trek, totally different kind of heart-racing); this condition is most often stress-induced.
Wow, you really can die from a broken heart.
So, how can you mend a broken heart? I’m neither a doctor, nor a therapist, nor one of The BeeGees, but I wish I had the answer, because mine is Under Pressure.
People die. David Bowie died. As did Alan Rickman. And a bunch of other people. We’ve all had family and friends who have died.
My point? Moments in time are just that. Big or small, once they’re gone, they’re gone. Life is for the living, even if you can now fulfill all your funeral needs (with drop dead prices) while buying vats of olive oil at Costco. They offer killer deals on multi-packs too. Check out their 6-foot deep discounts on dirt in the Home and Garden Section. Ok, I’m almost done. Prices to die for! Now I’m done. So instead of spending money on flowers, candles, and stuffed animals that rot in the streets, mourn and honour those we’ve lost by helping the living.
5 Ways I’m Not Under Pressure:
1. Bowie was a voice that told me to be me when I wondered if I should be someone else – I will forever adore and blame him for that, or at least blame him for being so persuasive. Goodnight, Mr. Bowie and thanks.
2.Alan Rickman made me Truly, Madly, Deeply – laugh (Galaxy Quest), cringe and cry (Harry Potter), shiver (Die Hard), and sigh (Sense and Sensibility). Goodbye.
3. I’ve lost many people in the last few years. I miss them. I wish I could see them again, but at least as time goes by my trips down memory lane, while frequent, are less bumpy, the ride is smoother around the edges.
4.When I was young, when dinosaurs roamed the Earth, we used to train it to Toronto to see concerts – before train fares and concert tickets skyrocketed. I was a goth/punk girl who didn’t know anything, but I sure had fun learning. My friend (who passed away almost a year ago) and I would hang around places like The Eaton’s Centre, knitting, reading, listening to a giant silver boom box we’d lug around – no cellphones or MP3 players back then. We met loads of cool people, ie. The Ramones, David Bowie, etc. I’m sure the meetings weren’t memorable to them, but for us it was like those voices that made us happy, made us dance came to life. When Bowie walked by we broke into a spontaneous chorus of Rebel, Rebel. This earned us tickets to his show, even backstage (whispered instructions to one of his entourage, of course). If we’d worried about looking silly, we would’ve missed dancing and swaying to the sounds on the stage. We wouldn’t have met lots of fascinating people, famous and never-gonna-be-famous. We wouldn’t have started a music magazine, raised money for those in need, got tons of cool promo stuff…Again, life is not only for the living, it’s to be lived. Take a chance, be brave, be bold, be in the here and now. Memories are fun, but not fuel for life.
5. Speaking of living – The X-Files reboot is only days away. The Truth Is Out There once again, just a,er, tad older…like me. I watched the spooky premiere on September 10, 1993 and never looked back. The only time I remember missing it was the night my son was born (totally, totally worth it). I thought of calling him Fox, but also a major Buffy fan, so…Xander it is.
Ashes to ashes, dust to stardust, we know people we loved and lost are still with us…No Pressure.
Thanks to all of you for standing by me, supporting me, my blog, and my blogging break.
Against all odds, I’ve tried to keep up with your blogs too, but couldn’t seem to muster the energy or inspiration to write a post myself.
I’ve resolved not to make any resolutions this new year, but to keep exploring this uncharted life of mine.
But here’s what happened when I was gone, sort of….
1. I learned I’m never going to be a proper gym bunny. It seems to involve an excessive amount of hair-flipping, giggling, spandex, and a thong or two where they don’t belong or two.
2.Inconsiderate people keep using my public library to take out books I wish to read. On a brighter note, they’ve increased the hold limit to 60 items!
3. Another plane, another train, but no way to get those Beastie Boys outta of my brain. Every time I see or hear an ad for the movie, Brooklyn voices inside my head sing: “No sleep till Brooklyn!”.
4. If you don’t try you can’t fail, but you can’t succeed either.
5.I miss when stuff didn’t have so many names or labels, when you could just like what you liked. My lovely childhood crushes on Tom Baker, Kirk, and Bobby Darin, ok, that one ended badly when I found out he’d been dead for several years (somewhere beyond the sea, for sure), anyway, all that would now be called ‘fangirling’. Long before Mr. Darcy plunged into that lake and Daryl Dixon picked up a crossbow, I had labels I didn’t know about. Forget labels, just be you, that’s enough.
6. People who say, “I’m not going to say I told you so” are really saying, “I told you so”.
7. I missed blogging! I needed a break, to write my book, catch up on life, which is being dreadfully uncooperative, but I missed this and you, dear readers and I bet you missed all my, er, blogging advice.
8. Imagine, you win millions in the lottery, would you spend it on a vanity project? That’s what Alice (Kristen Wiig) does in Welcome To Me, a weird little film with a big, brilliant cast including: Tim Robbins, Joan Cusack, James Marsden, Wes Bentley, Linda Cardellini, Jennifer Jason Leigh, Alan Tudyk. Full of uncomfortable moments, it had me questioning quite a few things, especially blogging – is blogging just a vanity project, a sort of emotional exhibitionism?
9. While suffering from Doctor Who, The Walking Dead, Haven, The Blacklist, Into The Badlands withdrawal, which wasn’t pretty and mostly consisted of me trying not to whine about it, since these are clearly First World Problems, to the extreme, I decided to read more (is that possible?). Why not get caught up on a few of the fascinating ‘And Philosophy…’ series from Open Court? I started with Doctor Who and Philosophy, then Downton Abbey,Homeland, and The Walking Dead. I noticed all these books toil to shatter the myth that TV is simply a vast cultural wasteland. Fighting zombies, taking tea, traveling through time and space, those are hooks to get us to watch and keep watching, it’s really about the interaction between the characters, the choices, the sacrifices, those moments when we see ourselves and feel or learn something. If it can happen in a book, why can’t it happen on TV or in movies? I love these books because like the TARDIS, they’re bigger on the inside, making me feel all esoteric, ideologicalish, and thinky, but without getting that time-consuming philosophy degree. Just the way I like it.
10. I sometimes forget (or wish to forget) what a tricky beast and ruthless, relentless taskmaster Fibromyalgia can be, but I’ll keep trying to keep on keeping on…easier said than done.
Tomorrow we could be alive or dead, but today, my friends, today we are alive, so go out there and live.
I had too much to dream last night.
I feel like I have a dream hangover.
I woke from my confusing, at times,
exhilarating Dickens’ A Christmas Carol-like dream
(unfortunately no Muppets), but
filled with revelations.
First, I was visited by Donald Trump who told me 3 others would visit that night. It was terrifying, he wore the chains of greed, intolerance, and suffering he’d forged link by link…it seemed like there was more of the hairspray than grave about him.
Then Colin Firth showed up as my Ghost of Christmas Pastin the white shirt from Pride and Prejudice(you know the one ladies). This dream just got a whole lot better. He reminded me that all things past are actually always still with us…
1. Christmas songs are playing everywhere yet I rarely hear Snoopy Vs. The Red Baron by The Royal Guardsman. It’s my all-time fav, it’s about peace on Earth, goodwill, and about how even the worst of enemies can put aside their differences, if only for a little while…we sure need more of that.
2. Dean Cain and many others we haven’t seen in a while do still have careers, kinda, hey, I like Christmas movies.
3. And even on a crummy morning a gingerbread man still makes his bed with cookie sheets.
Then Taylor Kinney (without fiancée, Lady Gaga…hey, it’s my dream) floated in as my Ghost of Christmas Present (subconscious you’re so good to me) dressed as Fireman and reminded me that despite the season, it’s getting hot in here. Whether it was just a hot flash or I’m watching too much Chicago Fire (is that possible?), I woke up in a sweat. Back to my dream, rescue me.
4. Christmas is about giving. Though I’m broke and obscure I still believe in giving to others and weirdly, sometimes you get stuff back. For example, by donating, I won a month gym membership and a few other goodies. So now I can be buff like Arnold, though I’m saying this in Schwarzeneggar accent, the buff part seems unlikely.
5. I’ve noticed my Mom (a senior) and my son (a teen with Autism) have a much fuller social life than I do, I need to work on that. And the only action I’m getting is from my latest mammogram.
6. I don’t have to wait in line for some guy in a red suit to make me promises, I’ll make some to myself.
My Ghost of Christmas Future was Norman Reedus, well, actually Daryl Dixon (my dream, so he’s holding a cat reminding us to Shop Cruelty Free https://www.crueltyfreeinternational.org/ – I’d like to add, that goes for people as well), who showed me that…
7. Christmas could be a little late this year, instead of making toys, Santa and the elves are already lined up to see Star Wars: The Force Awakens.
8. The Christmas feeling could be there, even without the gifts, the lights, the decorations, chocolate (this one is iffy), turkey and toys, even without the Christmas.
9. Ordinary rules of time and space don’t apply to Santa or The Doctor (Hello Sweetie, Doctor Who Christmas Special on almost Boxing Day – Christmas but late, can’t wait, but it’s times like these I miss David Tennant), but they do apply to us, we only have so much time in this world.
Can happiness or success be measured by what we have instead of the joy and comfort we bring to others? Do we really think in the end, we’ll care about how much we shopped, what car we drove, how big our home was, if we had the latest iPhone, or what we were wearing? Or will we remember the good times, the fun times, the laughter, the kindness, the little moments.
This season, remember a date on a calendar is just that, but life, life is for living, every day.
Oh yes, and if you don’t see me around here for a bit, I’ve checked myself into Clementine rehab.
Hello
It’s me
I was
Wondering
if after all
this time
we could
virtually meet
To go over
what is
real
or
bloggerspeak
Hello, can you hear me? I’m in Canada dreamingabout who I’ll one day be Hello from the other side Feels like I’ve blogged a thousand times I sometimes forget, uphill can make you rest And at least I can say I tried
Not as much tears me up anymore So hello from the other side Feels like I’ve blogged a thousand times
Thanks Adele, like ‘Hello’is ever leaving my head.
Hello, I’m probably one of the most honest people ever – except I lie.
When I say I’m fine, sometimes, I lie.
Even if it’s mostly to myself.
I haven’t been well for a while now, even more so than usual, which is saying something. I’ve been pushing through with sheer force of will, but even that is wearing thin.
Apparently I need more ‘self-care’, which apparently, I’m very not ‘good’ at it.
So when an unlikely source, Groupon threw me a line – 50% off movies and popcorn (I brought the popcorn home for my son), I thought, why not? I wasn’t disappointed to watch The Hunger Games take its final bow on the big screen, except the title Mockingjay Part 2, really, that’s kind of boring, how about The Mockingjay Awakens, or Mockingjay Hurray! or an Australian version, Mockingjay G’day! I wasn’t thrilled by The Hunger Games books, but I did enjoy exploring our world, choices, freedoms and illusions of, through this world, onscreen more. When Peeta (Josh Hutcherson) keeps asking Katniss (Jennifer Lawrence), ‘Real or Not Real’, I understood. Too often the world can feel violent and even surreal, but what is real…or not real? I suppose the best we can do is try to stand for something, or we’ll fall for anything.
Christmas music jingled away as I waited for the movie to begin, and I realized, blogging and Christmas have a lot more in common than I thought, like…
1. It’s better to give than receive. Even if you feel you don’t have enough, try to help others in some way. In blogging you can give by: ‘liking’, ‘sharing’, and/or ‘commenting’. You may not agree with every word, but appreciate that blogger took the time to post (as you wish to be appreciated).
2. Connection – you never know who you’re going to virtually meet and how they’ll change your life, or you theirs.
3. Fruitcake and posts – love, hate, like bits of, or given time, both could be used to prop open a door to…
4. Lots of surprises, awkward moments, comfort, joy, regifting, and more than a few ugly sweaters (still, it’s all in the eye of the beholder).
5. Plenty of glitz and fancy bits, yet sometimes, the substance and what really matters still shines through.
6. Gingerbread, yes, delightful, but sometimes hard to handle, especially without breaking.
9. Posts hung like stockings by the internet chimney with care, with hopes that readers soon will be there.
8. Cookies, meals out, eggnog, and other holiday treats, all awesome, but too many and you start to feel sluggish, tired, irritable, and overwhelmed. Blogging can be the same – know yourself, know your readers.
9. We can all be Santa’s Elves filling Santa’s shelves – bringing posts, perhaps comfort and joy…
10. Cookies, carrots, comments, posts, shares, maybe some milk (or in some cases, more adult libations) – all left for those we hope will show up.
11. Visions of sugar plums. Hoping to inspire and please, but sometimes, as hard as we try, our posts, our holidays, our days fall flat. There’s no time limit on getting up, or starting over. Dust off and try again!
12. Christmas trees, all different, just as all blogs are different. Don’t worry if you have the right niche, enough followers, comments, likes, etc. Don’t overthink. Send your creativity into the world, who knows what will come of it…anything, everything.
With blogging and Christmas and everything else, be brave, do what you feel, even if it goes wrong, you tried and that can’t really be wrong. Slow down, take the time to really enjoy and take it all in (including chocolate).
The good stuff doesn’t always make the bad stuff easier to take, but the bad stuff doesn’t always ruin the good stuff either.
We should try to be grateful for the good stuff, especially when there’s bad stuff.
We Could Be Grateful For:
1. Family and friends. The memory of family and friends. The possibility of family and friends.
2. Knowledge, free will, and finding respectful ways to agree to disagree.
3. Enjoying what you have, instead of always thinking about what you want.
4. Remembering both the good times and the bad – and not living in either.
5. Enjoying the everyday things. Life isn’t about the big moments.
6. Finding happiness, peace, or contentment, especially by making others happy, peace-filled, or contented.
7. Life and knowing that most people know it’s worth.
8. Being you. Don’t compare yourself to others.
9. Bad times, so you can appreciate the good times.
10. Giving – stuff, time, comfort, inspiration, hope, information…you.
Terror, in many forms has wormed it’s way into our lives, not just with violence, but with weapons such as: fear, rudeness, abuse, inequality, neglect, distractions, complacency, disrespect, self-righteousness, ignorance, intolerance, lying, scandal, gossip, corruption, manipulation, dogma, bullying, blame, and all those ‘gotcha’ moments.
We can change. Some will say we can’t, or worse, that’s just the way it is. Expect change. Be that change.
People can disagree, debate, wrangle, bicker, even argue, hopefully respectfully.
There’s also no need to agree, you have the right to disagree, again, respectfully.
Attacking anyone, verbally or physically, for their beliefs is pointless.
We can’t overcome hate with hate.
We can’t win by fighting.
Even if you feel hate, choose love or at least, forgiveness.
Even if you feel indifference, choose compassion.
Especially if you feel despair, choose hope.
I worry being ‘shocked’ every time something terrible happens, posting platitudes, changing profile pictures, holding vigils, leaving tokens, decrying the monsters, and placing blame gives the illusion of doing something when really, it’s mostly shopping, social media, socializing, and symbolism.
Wouldn’t it be more comforting to help those in need? To donate food, clothing, money for shelter and medical care instead of making piles of flowers, candles, stuffed animals, and flags that will just become garbage? I don’t understand, if we want to show respect why not help those who are still alive and suffering?
We need to find out how to change what’s happening, or brace ourselves for more of the same, or worse. The first rule of holes, when you’re in one, stop digging, and try to find a way out.
What’s coming will come, so instead of focusing on those who do harm, who spread fear and hate, let’s be grateful for those who help, who protect – those who do good in this world. They deserve our focus, not just after a tragedy, or crisis, or disaster, but all the time.
My heart goes out to the family and friends of those who have lost loved ones, death is tragic, no matter the circumstances…and to anyone suffering, everywhere.
Adding blogging to that and anxiety, well, it could be the proverbial straw.
When it’s quiet here on my blog, I have time to think.
Why am I really doing this?
Should I be doing this?
I have so much else to do, is this a distraction?
Or is blogging just another version of chocolate, sappy movies, wanting to cry, desperately wishing a time machine would materialize in my living room to whisk me back to a time when the biggest decisions I had to make were: what to wear to school, who to hang out with, what to listen to…Probably shouldn’t go back, I might scream at myself to quit wishing to grow up and just enjoy growing up.
Some days I feel like blogging is more Hotline Blog (I’m assured Drake will drop this as a follow-up to his famous Hotline Bling) You used to like me on my blog post Late or early when I needed blog love And I know when that hotline pinged It could only mean one thing… But these days, you’ve become a ghost Wonder if you’re out there forgettin’ about my blog post Doing other things, maybe making cinnamon toast
But blogging isn’t all about Likes, it’s about enjoying each other…
I try to imagine what my blog would have been if I blogged as a child, you know, before I knew:
1. I’d have a computer, in my home.
2. I’d use this computer to tell perfect strangers (well, maybe not perfect) stuff about my life.
3. My worst recurring nightmare wasn’t fear, it was the fear of fear.
4. Bacon would become both hero and villain.
5. Everyone lied to me about stuff, including but not limited to: Santa, this won’t hurt (it did), The Tooth Fairy, being “almost there” (we weren’t), there was no more chocolate (there was), and that I’d use math in real life…
6. Life is less Game of Life and more Monopoly.
7. Power is a commodity, not necessarily the one that lights up your home.
8. What skin tags are, let alone having them.
9. The world is crawling with serial killers, if TV is to be believed.
10. Some people will still be mean, even as adults.
11. I’d use numbers from a fortune cookie for lottery tickets.
12. My body would be my worst enemy.
13. I’d look more like Jessica Fletcher than Jessica Alba.
14. I’d still be watching Doctor Who, Monty Python, and so would my teen son.
15. I’d lose hours of my life to a mysterious world that delivers weird yet amusing things to me right at home (yes, including pizza and Amazon).
16. I’d ever tire of Christmas (well, the commercialism of Christmas).
17. I’d try figgy pudding…get out there – try, visit, read, comment, share, take part in something different.
18. I’d let zombies into my home at least once a week…and love it.
19. You can’t eat all the cake, you have to share it, same goes for blogging.
20. I’d have many families – the one I was born into, the ones I found and found me, the ones I’ve made, and this amazing blogging community.
So get out there, hakuna matata – visit some blogs, enjoy each other, and never forget, you’re not alone.
Regrets I’ve had a few, then again too few to mention.
So what if
my life is riddled
with plot holes
and logical gaps?
I have flaws and quirks (I say adorable, some may beg to differ).
I’m thoughtful and thoughtless.
Brilliant and oh so dumb, sometimes astonishingly, at the same time.
I’m a gloriously human jumble.
So why do we expect our entertainment to be perfect when we aren’t? As humans, we get caught up in things, even now, computers are galactically buzzing about the new Star Wars, loving it, trashing it, or both, and it hasn’t even hit theaters yet. I admit, my unease intensifies as The Force Awakens.
There were times, I’m sure you knew, when I bit off more than I could chew-ie and I didn’t want to become blaster fodder. And Disney buying Star Wars made my complicated relationship go full Death Star explosion (scared of it I am). But Star Wars On Trial looked interesting, so I let the tractor beam pull me in (that’s no moon, that’s a blog post!).
I consider myself an intelligent viewer (is that an oxymoron?), so I selected the 8th charge against the accused iconic franchise, The Plot Holes and Logical Gaps in Star Wars Make It Ill-Suited for An Intelligent Viewer.
I agree, sometimes watching these movies, I just want to say, go home Star Wars you’re drunk, but I believe those who consume the story are culpable, not the storyteller.
Upon first review of the charges, perhaps it does seem like only morons would enjoy movies like Star Wars –I’m paraphrasing, the witnesses for prosecution, Nick Mamatas and defense, Don DeBrandt were actually quite witty and eloquent. Star Wars certainly did it all and not in a shy way, oh no, let the record show George Lucas took the blows, and did it his way.
I’ll state my case, of which I’m sorta certain, the details of the story aren’t nearly as important as the story itself. Why? Because we are the story.
We are Yoda, who trained Luke (more or less), but once said Anakin was too old to train, back in the days of surplus Jedi.
We are Obi-Wan Kenobi, I mean, Ben Kenobi hiding Luke Skywalker in plain sight, on a barren planet where most everything wants to kill him – guess we know who the favoured child was.
We are Darth Vader (really, you didn’t recognize your own kids?), Han Solo, Amidala, Picard, The Avengers, The Doctor, Sherlock, Buffy, Leia, Luke (ewww, dude, you kissed your sister), The Lorax, Bugs Bunny, Scarlett O’Hara, Rick Grimes (You think it’s a plot hole, but it ain’t!), Rocky, Capt. Jack, Batman, Frodo, C-3PO, Scully, Mulder, Scrooge, Kirk, James Bond, Edward Scissorhands, Simpsons, Reddington (The Blacklist is a logical gap, who cares, watching James Spader read menus would be entertaining),
Chewie, Daryl Dixon, Darcy, Katniss, Joker, Boo Radley (having a moment), The Griffins, Keyser Söze, Willy Wonka, Don Draper, Bridget Jones, Charlie Brown, Harry Potter, Walter White, Spock, R2-D2 (the real hero of SW) and more…
No spoilers, I enjoyed all the sci-fi and fantasy authors, including, but not limited to David Brin and Matthew Woodring Stover who diligently prosecuted and defended the idolized, intriguing, yet infuriating series while the Droid Judge (This isn’t the Droid Judge you’re looking for) attempted to keep order.
And enter to win a free copy of Star Wars on Trial fromBenBella Books (Canada or U.S only). In the comment box below, tell me your most hated or loved plot hole or logical gap (any book, movie, TV show, or life). Notification via droid (or me) November 15, 2015 – all contact will be confidential.
I would say life isn’t logical. How could it be when we live it on a baffling blue ball twirling in space like a tattered ballerina in a vintage music box?
Stories are told by humans and therefore, delightfully flawed.
Think of it like extra cheese on lasagna, yes, it’s irrelevant, but does that mean it shouldn’t have happened? Life is messy. Take a bite.
There never seems to be enough time
to do the things you want to do,
but there might be,
if I stopped blogging…
But I like blogging…
Yet it’s time-consuming…
Once you’ve let that blogging genie out of the bottle, there’s no turning back. I keep trying to get away, but blogging keeps pulling me back in.
I also like making people laugh, I might be the one during the apocalypse: “Knock Knock.” Random guy, “Who’s there?”“Zombie.”“Zombie who?” Me running, yelling, “Zombie, behind you, run!”
Then again, too much time isn’t always good, when I have time to think, I often feel like an alien in this world. Not the rubbery, gray, tall, skinny aliens, more like the ET-hey-I-landed-on-your-planet-I need-to-phone-home-wow-your-long-distance-plan-sucks-at-least-the-snacks-are-yummy-does-this-dress-make-me-look-fat-type alien.
Going out on a limb, I’d say I’m not the only one who’s ever felt they’re waiting for the mothership to take them back to their home planet.
If only I’d arrived with an instruction manual. I know my parents wish I did.
Time runs by us, screaming like a babysitter in a horror movie. And as another Halloween creeps up, let us pay our last respects to things gone, but not forgotten…maybe they’ll return someday (hopefully not as zombies):
1. Hairspray, you once permeated every part of our lives, especially our lungs…guess we’re kinda grateful big hair is dead.
2. Mixed tapes have gone to join the choir invisible – mixed emojis?
3.Adieu giving up your seat to someone elderly or disabled or pregnant; apparently now they must fend for themselves, Game of Thrones-style.
4.Farewell phones, attached to a cord, instead of our hand or head.
5. Once loved and adored, held up on a pedestal, billboards, race cars, own section in the grocery store…poor little gluten, now dead to many, a social pariah.
6. RIP, ‘Please’, ‘Thank You’, and ‘You’re Welcome’, now ghosts of civilities past.
7. Quiet time, without tweets, updates, texts, and emails has kicked the bucket…Remember? Probably not, with all the digital amnesia…
8. Showing up at your new neighbours with baked goods has shuffled off this mortal coil; no friendly greetings, just pepper spray, the police, and/or speech on food allergies.
9. Bereft of life are ‘Thank You’ notes, but I’m still thankful to people who say cardshark instead of cardsharp, so I can picture a shark playing poker.
10.Talking to plants is now pushin’ up the daisies, can’t we just text them, telling them 2 gro?
11. Not asking for gifts and money has kinda bought the farm – #gimme is society’s new hashtag.
12. Wobbly inside-out pools hidden under threads of Egyptian cotton; waterbeds gone to their watery grave.
13. Patience is at death’s door, but really, there’s nothing you could possibly have to do (or explain to a judge) that’s worth putting children at risk, on Halloween, or any time. Please pay attention while driving, I promise that absolutely fascinating tweet, update, text, or email about:
how porcupines mate without stabbing each other,
the shape of dog’s poop,
a divine fat, gluten and dairy-free no-bake cheesecake recipe (can that still be called cheesecake?),
cats robbed of their dignity via the internet,
if Bon Jovi’s hair is still real (see #1),
which Kardashian is getting married or divorced (all of them),
if Taco Bell is health food (it’s not),
finding out who died on The Walking Dead (hint hint, no one, they’re actors),
Justin Bieber’s private parts (what part of private is hard to understand, Justin?),
discussions about Donald Trump’s IQ (rich doesn’t equal smart)…
will all be there later, sadly. If not, what did you really miss?
I guess we make time to do the things we want to do, so I’ll save every blogging day ’til blog eternity passes away, just to spend them with you, dear readers.
All that peace and love stuff, it’s just idealistic mumbo jumbo, right?
Or is it?
While I admit I don’t understand a lot of stuff, but as long as it’s not really hurting anyone, why would I care?
Too often, the commonly held view seems to be that if we don’t agree, we’re at odds.
Like somehow 7 billion of us are suddenly going to start agreeing, or we have to battle it out Star Trek style.
For example, I find the rise of pumpkin spice alarming – apparently pumpkin spice is a season now, so the pumpkin spice must flow.
Here’s a completely incomplete list of stuff people do that I don’t ‘get’, or want to (no particular order):
1. Touching wet paint or wet cement – yes, it’s wet, move on. 2. Running water after going to the bathroom instead of actually washing your hands. 3. Lying, lying, and what was that other thing, oh yeah, lying. 4. Judging a person based on their skin tone, religion, race, nationality, whom they choose to love, clothes, home, family, etc.
5. Walking into traffic looking at a cellphone. 6. Bad driving. 7. Hurting others, especially children. 8. Loving something just because it’s endorsed by or has the name of a celebrity.
9. Using racism as a political strategy. 10. Fat shaming, and also those who say fat shaming is wrong, because they’re also calling people fat. 11. Having fictional conversations in your head with others (ok, done this). 12. Not smiling back at a child or being impatient when an elderly person is slowly walking down the stairs in front of you.
13. Yelling at furniture that jumped out and stubbed your toe (ok, I’ve totally done that). 14. Wearing uncomfortable shoes (especially with stubbed toes). 15. People who pretend they don’t fart (you do, we all do, own it). 16. Reading the instructions after you’ve done something.
17. Saying “I’m sorry” when you’re not sorry. 18. Unenvironmentalists (you know that should be a word). 19. Buying non-orange pumpkins. 20. Pretending you don’t wish some cool movie-like thing would happen to you today instead of just the usual stuff…come on, you really haven’t done this?
I can’t understand how people find the time or energy to judge, fight, or generally care so much about everyone else’s business. Does this have to do with our fight or flight response? Not running from sabre-tooth tigers (mostly), our fear response is now triggered by shopping (prices are terrifying), finding info on the internet (bloodcurdling), and politicians (I’ll take the tiger). Obviously our fear of scarcity has survived, so maybe those who are different or disagree feed into that fear. I’m just guessing, frankly, I’m baffled.
The internet just seethes with fear and loathing which is why I’m happy when I find bloggers who make me smile. David Prosser, a wonderful, funny, and caring blogger from Wales offered the world his Buthidars philosophy https://lorddavidprosser1.wordpress.com/ – a hug, a good deed, a simple gesture, a smile…forging a path toward peace.
And he shares his life each week at: https://barsetshirediaries.wordpress.com/ and kindly shared one of his novels, The Queen’s Envoy, with the caveat, it wasn’t everyone’s cup of tea. Perhaps, but I emphatically enjoyed the fanciful flight of fictitious foibles. It reminded me of watching Bond movies with my Dad. As a child I didn’t understand what Pussy Galore, Holly Goodhead, and “Oh James!”really meant, but the spirit of adventure always made me feel like anything was possible. I like that feeling, wherever I can find it.
It’s Thanksgiving this weekend in Canada;I’m thankful we can all agree to disagree, eh. I don’t tell people they’re stupid for their beliefs and I don’t expect them to understand my complicated relationships with: chocolate, spiders, TV, sleep, housekeeping, kale, Jane Austen, gravity, technology, toenail clippers, Christmas, pools (you know, cause of sharks), clowns, Thanksgiving, meat, and life in general.
We don’t have to agree to have fun, be respectful, and add love and hope to the world.
So let me get this straight – you take the good you take the bad you take the both and there you have The Facts of Life? That can’t be right. Can it? Am I getting this whole thing facts of life and happiness stuff all wrong? Maybe chocolate was the answer all along. Could it really be that easy? Could that be what the universe is trying to tell me as my happiness project carries on?
1. My brain, which doubles as an MP3 player, awakes to music, a foggy playlist scampering to Jack Johnson crooning, Upside Down then Blind Melon, David Bowie, and Tears For Fears all melodically reminisced about Change… 2. The pages of The Cake Therapist by Judith Fertig, came to life as I read, making me want more. Then I thought of Jennifer Aniston in Cake, amazing, but tissues at the ready. With cake, like life we gradually add one thing after another, hopefully in the right order, until there’s something delightful.
3. Luke Bryan wanted me to Kick the Dust Up(point me to a cornfield, cause, damn, that’s catchy). 4. I think my happy place may have vandals…maybe I didn’t lock up after the last time I left.
5. Never forget. 6. The basic insultiness of the TV adaptation of Pamela Redmond Satran’s Younger – all young people are flibbertigibbits/all older people are past their sell-by-date. Like Sex and the City you have to suspend belief, your hold on reality, even your dignity to buy what they’re selling. Begs the questions, could I pass for younger and if so, why? I would like the naturally elastic skin back. 7. Lisa Whelchel + Kim Fields + farm from Smallville, here’s a fact of life, yup, all in the same movie, For Better or Worse…ok, definitely worse.
Week 16
1. Barenaked Ladies felt they needed to remind me of good times and that I don’t have a million dollars, but what I could do if I did.
2. Let’s Make A Deal is still on? What year is this? 3. Wilson Phillips begged me to Hold On (thanks, I got this). 4. Took a delicious and mind-etching bite of Wes Anderson’s droll, absurd The Grand Budapest Hotel. Can a movie be too amazing? If so, this is.
5. Tim McGraw told me to live like I was dyin’, well, duh. 6. Watched season première of Doctor Who…remembered why I love it. Let’s forget last season. 7. New series, Mr. Robot where Christian Slater seems to be reviving his Pump Up The Volume role, just older, but still angry. As a hacker, now instead of Talking Hard, he’s Typing Hard.
Week 17
1. The clock ticks, my birthday looms, another season falls away…I guess even when you feel stuck, or trapped and there seems to be no escape, no way out (like in The Maze Runner, oh great, now I’m going to have Wild Boys by Duran Duran in my head), you can turn another corner and wow, you’re out…or maybe just borrow a ladder and climb out. 2. Really want to watch The Fault In Our Stars, not sure I’m ready for ugly crying, especially when I have a cold https://yadadarcyyada.com/2013/10/06/the-fault-in-our-stars/ 3. Writing, like everything else doesn’t have to be perfect. Sometimes it’s perfect to just unfocus and be.
4. Should I read A Writer’s Guide to Persistence by Jordan Rosenfeld, or would I just gave up? 5. Does it weird anyone else out that if you remove an ‘s’, the French word for fish looks like poison?
6. I need to invent a way to eliminate dusting, perhaps by eliminating dust. 7. What if life is like a bowl of cherries and we’re the pits?
Maybe I just need some sleep…without The Cure burbling in on all 8 legs of Lullaby. If they’re The Cure, what was the disease again?
You’re the one thing I just can’t get enough of.
I’ll tell you something, it could be blog love.
Because I’ve had the time of my life
and I’ve rarely felt this way before,
I swear, it’s the truth and I owe it all to you…
Always liked Dirty Dancing’s message that nothing is impossible (well, except a sequel with Patrick Swayze…or Jennifer Grey’s original nose). And that nobody should put me in a corner, unless I paint myself in (true story).
Which lead me to Laggies, ok Sam Rockwell lead me there, but intrigued and entertained, I stayed. Kiera Knightley plays a quirky woman (no surprise, but this time, no British accent, way to step out there) who too often waits for others to make decisions for her. Instead of living life according to someone else’s schedule, beliefs, and dreams she decides to follow her heart, her dreams, and finds a her version of happiness.
1. Company from out-of-town, got them hooked on Haven, muhahaha…also, food involved.
2. Realized people would be 500lbs if they ate as much food as the characters in Joanne Fluke books.
3. Read a great book on memory…can’t remember the title.
4. Re-pledged undying allegiance to public libraries.
5.Thought about taking up knitting….hmm, instead read a book about women in a knitting club, close enough.
6. Read Beekeeping for Dummies…I have more chance of being a bee than a beekeeper apparently.
7. Tried not to second guess myself, wait, unless that’s a bad idea.
Week 12
1. Had a zen moment where I just felt floaty – good job remembering not to do this while driving or operating heavy machinery.
2. Donated more stuff.
3. Dental emergency – I know I’ve always tried to be good to you, teeth, but I’ll redouble my efforts.
4. Pain from dental work, watched The Originals and thought, do vampires need dental work?
5. Some pain, not as much as Orphan Black (wow, Tatiana Maslany playing endless clones just never gets boring), had me revisiting The Island of Dr. Moreau, did I almost forgot how epic H.G. Wells was?
6. Went to mall and yard sales, not sure which were more surreal, people buying junk or selling it.
7. Watched Fear The Walking Dead, really, like anyone would notice the zombie apocalypse that quickly these days, especially in LA.
Week 13
1. Haters gonna hate, but they’re just noise, listened to the good stuff instead.
2. Lost more of my baby weight, sure, my baby’s 17, but better late than never, right?
3. Computer’s dying; it has Windows Vista if that gives you any idea of it’s age. Looked for new one.
4. Worried excessively about passing driving test until I noticed I had chocolate…feeling fine.
5. Passed my last driving test, yup, you can teach an old dog new tricks. They’re dreadfully obsessed with parallel parking, so this is about parallel posting, aka, please leave your link here (in the comment section – any post) for others to find to celebrate with me.
6. Saw a music video that made me wonder if I’d been dancing incorrectly for years as my underwear doesn’t show.
7. Master of Horror Wes Craven, died. I always wondered, could some of my insomnia stem from watching Nightmare of Elm Street?
Week 14
1. Spent time chatting online with Microsoft; quickly realized I knew more than they did.
2. Reminded again how wonderful and brave my son is.
3. Sang Nothing Compares 2 U, out loud, thinking of my blogging friends.
4. Oh, so that’s what it sounds like when the doves cry.
5. Thought about what I’m going to do next, writing wise.
6. Made a bouquet of pencils.
7. Wrote more emails to politicians and news people.
Remember, it’s just an illusion the world is racing past, go at the speed that makes you happy. Have the time of your life.
It’s been 2 years since I started blogging and I feel like I’ve won the lottery…accept without any of the money, so yeah, I’d still like to win an actual lottery.
I’m so thankful for your support, likes, comments, shares, advice, encouragement, comfort, and more. I’m also thrilled and privileged to be able to read and view your works. Thank you all.
So come on, I’m talkin’ to you, help me Shout! Shout! Let it all out to celebrate my 2 year blog birthday by leaving your blog address or a link to a post in the comment section below…please!
Now to play catch-up. I’ve fallen behind on my Changes for Happiness project, not the doing, just the writing about it. Will a weak, ‘it’s been hot’ explain the lapse?
2. Looked at some old photos, I cried, but remembered to be happy it happened, not that it’s gone.
3. Watched something I wanted to watch, but didn’t feel I had time.
4. Bit the bullet (not literally, high dental bills) and made that appointment.
5. Tore up that shirt I loved, to use as rags – it lived a full life.
6.Craved a burger – If I liked it then I should have put an onion ring on it.
7. This was the birthday of my friend of 30 years, Rose, who recently passed away; she would have wanted there to be music and cake.
Week 7
1. Cleaned first…then checked emails.
2. Decided on 3 fun things and did them (within the limits of time, budget, circumstances, etc.)
3. Broke a bad habit, snapped it over my knee (not that knee, the other one).
4. Don’t like to go shopping, don’t do it often…going to do it even less.
5. Time is flying…going to catch a ride.
6. Added 15 minutes more exercise, Tai Chi and yoga per day.
7. Hell On Wheelsis back – I was frontiered and I liked it.
Week 8
1. Rewatched Jaws – that shark was a handsome devil, wasn’t he?
2. Picked up a random book (eyes closed) from the new release section of the library.
3. Was it weird the random book ended up being Stephen King’s Finders Keepers?
4. Tried again to learn how to juggle.
5. Remembered why I don’t juggle – kept ice on my cheek.
6. Sang Shout! by Tears for Fears at the top of my lungs (received odd looks).
7. My hair is edging toward the Mary Tyler Moore look, unless I’m planning on wearing a hat and tossing it in the air – I need to think about getting a haircut.
Week 9
1. Kept writing that book.
2. Tried to accept the idea of Ben Affleck as Batman – isn’t doing the impossible good for the soul?
3. Wrote down 5 things that make my life tough…tried to eliminate or mitigate their effects.
4. What would I do for those Klondike ice cream cones on sale? Don’t ask, don’t mmmm, ice cream.
5. Tried to go cold turkey to stop binge-watching Haven…mmmm, stuffing and gravy and biscuits.
6. Wrote about Haven, sadly it didn’t work it out of my system.
7. Rewatched Clueless – wow, Paul Rudd is now Ant-Man, 20 years can really be harsh. Whatever.
Week 10
1. Little brown bird landed on my shoulder as I was walking, then flew off (and no poop) – briefly like Snow White.
2. Thought about going to a movie; watched one at home instead, cheaper and just love the staff.
3. Dreamed about sleeping in.
4. Noticed that it’s my 2 year Blogiversary/Blogaversary/Blog Birthday on WordPress, since I’m having company for the weekend – invite everyone to the party early!
5.Pack up a box of stuff and give it away.
6. Trying to accept that some people will never change…and would I trust them again, even if they magically did?
7. Deep breathing. Note to self, don’t do this while calling people.
Thank you for dropping by to celebrate with me – you realize, of course, all of the above involved chocolate, right?
Young
I dreamed
I read
Anything
Everything
Young
I danced
I sang
Motion
Rhythm
Young
I loved
was loved
Possibilities
Passion
Promise
Young
Invincible
Unmarred
My mind full of me
Fearless
Thoughtless
Until youth ran from me
~D. Parker
Have you ever had one of those odd weeks, where you had to choose from odd choices? I did, and it seemed as though my viewing and reading, though vastly different, all had a common theme, at least, in my mind: choices.
Gone Girl. Mesmerizing, mostly due to Rosamund Pike’s luminously disturbing performance. The choices in this film and the fall-out of them had me speculating, head-shakingly weirded-out, kind of appalled and that wasn’t even by Ben Affleck’s ‘acting’. Pretty sure this goes into the movies-not-to-see-on-a-first-date category – https://yadadarcyyada.com/2015/02/14/20-movies-to-avoid-on-a-first-date/
Zoo. Sorry, not Zoo Station by U2, but that would be a cool theme song, this Zoo is the TV adaptation of James Patterson’s bestselling-creepy-makes-Blackfish-look-like-Disneyland novel about how animal behaviours are changing and becoming more aggressive toward humans (gee, I can’t understand why, we’ve been sooo nice to them) due to choices and changes we’ve made.
Annie. I love Annie’s gumption and her choice to never be limited, to meet her hard-knock life with a smile, a song, kindness, and courage. I tried to watch the latest version, I don’t care what you change, as long as you don’t mangle the songs…yup, they mangled the songs.
Poldark. You’d think the trials and tribulations of people in the 1800s would at some point cease to be enthralling and yet…not even slightly, BBC, Masterpiece me some more! 40 years after the first run of this series, Aidan Turner (The Hobbit movies, The Tudors, Being Human, TMI, etc.) was chosen to take on the famous role of Capt Ross Poldark and he might give Colin Firth’s Mr Darcy a run for his money…might.
Miss Emily: A Novel.Ireland’s Nuala O’Connor(Penguin) brings us this fictional re-imagining of a time in the life of a writer known for her eccentricity almost as much as her poetry, Emily Dickinson.
When I read what I call a coat-tail book (a book that uses a famous historical or fictional character to bolster their success), I think, would this be as good if they hadn’t use a famous name? In this book, I found the main character being Emily Dickinson distracted from a well-written, at times disturbing, but ultimately intriguing story of overcoming trauma, adversity, and anxiety.
The story is told to us with the alternating voices of Emily and an Irish servant girl, Ada, who works for the unconventional Dickinson family in Amherst, Massachusetts. We see how the choices of the main characters and those around them affect lives, but more than that, how they respond to those choices.
With or without the charming voice of Emily Dickinson, an interesting read.
Our choices and the choices of others lead us down many paths, but none of those choices defines us, what we do after, that does.
Of lovers and friends I still can recall. Some are dead and some are living…
In my life I loved them all.
~The BeaTles
Why do we love when it hurts so much to lose those we love?
How would you answer this question, dear readers?
My answer is as simple and as complex as love itself.
I don’t know for sure, but I think because it feels so amazing to love and be loved, also, we need each other and love connects in a way that nothing else can.
Love and loss haunt me these days.
I decided reading would offer it’s usual distraction.
As I read Love, Rosie aka Where Rainbows End by Cecelia Ahern(Hachette Books), I felt like I was watching a long Friends episode.
Beyond wanting to swat the characters for being such annoying goofs, I was left with a nagging feeling about love and communication and their places in the modern world.
This book and movie adaptation wouldn’t have happened if the two main characters even once had a simple, honest conversation. There, end of book and they lived more or less happily ever after.
But that’s the thing, isn’t it? We can communicate each moment of every day in multiple ways, yet our communication skills seem to be deteriorating. Does non-stop communication help if we’re not telling each other what we really need to know? Ahern also wrote P.S. I Love You, a funny and poignant book, with the beautiful lesson of going on when you’re ready to go on, how you’re ready to go on, after any kind of loss, but I still liked the movie better – I blame Harry Connick Jr.
I’m sorry, baby, I didn’t mean it. There’s also: Jeffrey Dean Morgan, Gerard Butler, and James Marsters. Oops, I’m sorry book, probably should have read you before I saw the movie. The characters didn’t give me what I wanted, I didn’t feel a sincerity or connection, or maybe I was expecting too much.
Love comes into our lives in many ways, family, friends, lovers, partners; to fill, enrich, challenge, sustain, nurture, embrace, excite, thrill, comfort, cherish, and support us.
It also leaves in many ways.
How can love continue to breathe when it’s viciously torn away, crushed, betrayed, taken for granted, withdrawn, or ignored?
Because it once was and in some way, somewhere, will always be.
I lost someone I love very much yesterday.
I really can’t imagine a world without…but I must.
Gone from this world, but forever in my heart.
Which weirdly leads me to Week 4 of my Changes/Happiness Project. I wanted to fall in love again with life, and despite the loss life has repeatedly pummeled me with, I want to keep loving. Here are the first 3 weeks of challenges, if you wish to follow along, or just read about it.
1. Decide on 5 things I’d love to do today and just do them (within the limits of time, budget, circumstances, etc.)
2. New bedtime routine: think of 5 things that went well or I was grateful for today and 5 things to hope for, in days ahead.
3. Write down 10 things I want to change, but think I can’t…try to change them.
4. Avoid the cake stalking me. You give cake a bad name. It’s the power of cake. You’d think that people would have had enough of silly cake songs… Don’t know how much longer I can hold out.
5. Reduce stimuli (mental and physical).
6. Remove a 100 calories per day (chocolate, I still love you, but there’s going to be a shortage of you soon and we have to get used to being apart…ok, that’s long enough.)
7. Construction begins on our street. Allow some time each day to admire the workers…work.
So why do we love when it hurts so much to lose people? You don’t turn down the greatest gift in the world just because you can’t keep it forever.
No one ever talked or did stuff like they did in 80’s movies. Ever.
In the future, they’ll probably dig up 80’s movies and come to conclusions like: Ferris Bueller was a god, aliens could phone home from Earth, “wax on, wax off” was a common phrase, and paternity results were only told to your child in space, after you cut off their hand. They’re going to think the 80’s were even more messed up than they were.
And what was with romance in the 80’s? Why sit on a table with a birthday cake and a cute boy? I can think of much better things to do…with that cake. Everyone was dancing – dirty dancing, flashdancing, Kevin Bacon dancing (don’t know what else to call it).
A guy with a boom box and a trench coat outside your house…nowadays, restraining order, or it would go viral, or both.
Officers, gentlemen, risky business, funny business. Adventures, in space or babysitting, as long as they were most excellent, dude. Supernatural, psycho, science, time travel – sometimes all at once. Where’d they get all the gremlins, goonies, vampires, muppets, and aliens? Actually, that all sounds like the soundtrack to my 80’s.
Know what also ruled in the 80’s? Political incorrectness. Who could worry about offending anyone when girls just wanted to have fun and boys wanted girls to have fun, especially with them?
I kind of miss it. Sure, political correctness is good in theory, don’t say unto others what you don’t want said to you, but has the correctness over-corrected? I don’t know if you can change human nature, people just say weird stuff.
“That’s the best kind of cancer to have.” Let’s review that sentence. Nope, still looks weird. The best kind of cancer is no cancer.
“Don’t worry.” Why are they telling me not to worry, is it because they know I should be worried and they don’t want me to panic?
“Do you have a bathroom?” Did you mean to ask if you can use my bathroom, because yes, I have a bathroom, I don’t ‘go’ in the yard.
“Money won’t make you happy.” I think money and I would be very happy together, we’d make the perfect couple (couple of million).
“Time heals all wounds.” Not true. Time doesn’t heal anything, it just passes.
“If you get lost in the woods, don’t panic.” Of course I’m going to panic! I’m lost, in the woods!!! Surrounded by bears, badgers, and bugs, maybe zombies in the dark (when I picture being lost in the woods, it’s always dark), and with my luck, zombie bears, badgers and bugs (note to self, pitch a spin-off to AMC, working title, The Walking Bears, Badgers, and Bugs™ ).
“Everything happens for a reason.” Technically correct, but I’m not sure that’s how people mean it.
“I think therefore I am.” Not true for everyone, have you been on the internet?
“I know you are, but what am I?” This one is actually timeless.
1. Remove 15 minutes or more per day of sitting time (replace with dancing, but with less enthusiasm to Falco’sRock Me Amadeus, my knee will thank me).
2. Remove another 100 calories per day (Again, not veggies…perhaps cake, but not, like chocolate cake, right?).
3. Remove 15 minutes or more of screen time per day to read or research.
4. Do 1 thing I’ve put off doing.
5. Read a book I said I’d never read (doesn’t leave me the range you’d think it would).
6. Pay it forward, aka do something good and don’t tell anyone what I did.
7. Try a food I haven’t tried (I guess I can’t sneak cake in and pretend?).
I have always been me and despite many attempts to make me not me, I still seem to manage to be me.
That’s not always a good thing.
Read some of my stuff, comment, critique, praise, ignore, puzzle, or just do whatever you want.
That’s my blog bio…everything else you’ll learn in my posts or you don’t care.
Every time I think I understand, even vaguely, how the world works, it tilts on its axis, spinning me right round, baby right round, like a record. Turns out, the blogging world is no different. Like everyone else on the planet (that might be a slight exaggeration, overstatement was never my strong suit), I have a blog. If I had a cat it would have a blog about sleeping, eating, and occasionally chasing a mouse lurking around the property. The mouse would have a blog about his adventures trying to escape the cat that bothers him while he’s trying to lurk around the property. And so on.
August 2013, I started this blog to relax, to practice writing, and to be more concise, with varying degrees of success. My Very Me-ness doesn’t always translate well, but no need to worry (hear that brain, no need to worry…forget it, it’s not listening), I’ve been embraced by readers, bloggers, etc. and I feel snug as a bug in a virtual rug.
Blogging has been difficult in many ways, but has made me fall in love with writing again, which guided me to start a year-long project to add even more happiness (Or contentment? Peace of mind?) to my life.
This week’s goals: 1. Remove 15 minutes or more of screen time per day and play a game with my son (I want chess, he wants Pokémon, maybe we need a Pokémon chess set). 2. Remove 100 calories per day (No cheating, it can’t be veggies…Step away from the cookies). 3. Remove 15 minutes or more of screen time per day and just write, doesn’t matter what. 4. Remove 15 minutes or more per day of sitting time (replace with Yoga and Tai Chi). 5. Spend 15 minutes or more per day submitting articles and manuscripts, especially knowing they might be rejected.
6. Change 15 minutes of internet time to relaxation and rest. 7. Give away, use, or get rid of 1 or more items a day.
Blogging myths busted and wisdom learned:
1. Blogging is solitary. Wrong. Blogging, my friends, is social and addictive, like sugar, and as the song by Maroon 5 says (I’ve tried to get it out of my head, believe me), I need a little sweetness in my life, your sugar, yes, please!
2.You need to have something to say to have a blog. How snotty and daft was that assumption? Everyone has something to say.
3.Blogging is simple. Wrong again, complicated, yet worth it, despite the intricacies that sometimes make you feel like your head might explode. Mistakes have been made and more shall be made; it’s all part of learning.
4. Success! I thought I needed to be a world-famous writer, then I saw comments that said I’d made people laugh, smile, and think. Anything else that comes along would be the icing on this delicious, chocolatey cake of a blog experience thanks to you, dear readers.
5. Blogging is constant. Wrong. As with life, the only thing you can count on in blogging is change. For example, I believe the WordPress motto is: If it ain’t broke, fix it a few times a day. Twitter seems to have a midlife crisis every few weeks and I don’t know what happened to Facebook. There are: trolls, traffic, topics, taboos, privacy issues, time, concentration…what was I saying? Oh yes, so the question today is, to blog or not to blog? For now, the answer is…why not?
Everyday in the media and social media I hear about happiness.
Happiness Projects,
Happiness Quotients,
Happiness Index,
Gross National Happiness,
polls, songs, quotes…
what’s with all the happiness?
Is wretchedness and melancholy really that out of style?
Where are the memes celebrating the drudgery of everyday life?
Where are all the T-shirts promoting doom and gloom?
If happiness is sooooo easy why does everyone have to be constantly reminded to be happy?
When did we become so obsessed with measuring and quantifying happiness? When it became big business, that’s when. I’ve been thinking a lot about happiness lately so I was drawn to The Happiness Industry: How the Government and Big Business Sold us Well-Being by William Davies(Verso). I felt the book was overly academic, like I needed a degree in something to understand it, but it did have some fascinating, logical, brilliant, and disturbing points about how we’re being sold happiness and at what cost. Happiness is a new religion.
But what if we’re being sold a one-size-fits-all happiness coat? It seems to insulate us against heartache, but instead, it’s drafty, the seams are fraying, and oops, it’s not waterproof. I’ve been sales-pitched happiness for years, and I’m starting to feel consumer fatigue. I’m guessing a lot of people aren’t feeling ‘the happy’ the way they’re told they should be feeling it, especially if the amount of loneliness, antidepressants, and boredom are any indication.
I find people endlessly fascinating, though I could live to be a 1000 and still never grasp their full complexity. Maybe I don’t want to, there’s nothing more thrilling than a mystery. I’ve observed that people seem to think they have to add things and people to their life to be happier, but what if it’s quite the opposite, what if you have to remove things and people to be happier?
I decided to start my own Happiness Savings Plan – pool then diversify my assets and lose some liabilities. I want to make sure I keep falling in love, over and over again, with my son’s laughter, books, music, clouds, chocolate, TV, movies, loved ones, conversation, kittens, dreams, puppies, laughter, hope…I’m tired of hearing about: The Kardashians, FIFA, Bruce Jenner/Caitlyn (I don’t care about the choice, I’m just sick of endless publicity-seeking), spy pigeons, wrinkled selfies (pretty much all selfies at this point actually), drought shaming, fat shaming, age shaming, sex mad marsupials…sigh,I’m feeling less happy just thinking about it all.
So for the next 365 days my plan is to make changes, one per day, mostly removing things; perhaps it will make me happier, perhaps not, only time will tell.
I invite you, my dear readers to join, if you so wish, don’t feel like you need to, or do the same changes. And don’t worry, there won’t be endless posts about my C-C-Changes Plan, just an update here and there…
My first week is as follows:
1. Remove 15 minutes or more of internet time per day.
2. Remove 15 minutes or more of news/politics per day.
3. Remove 15 minutes or more of sitting per day.
4. Give up one TV show.
5. Change 15 minutes of screen time into reading or listening to a book time.
6. Take 15 minutes or more to organize .
7. Learn something new each day.
It might be challenging, but as G.K. Chesterton reminded us, “There are two ways to get enough. One is to continue to accumulate more and more. The other is to desire less.”
“They were in the wrong place at the wrong time. Naturally they became heroes.” Princess Leia Organa of Aldaraan, Senator
This is one of my favourite quotes from Star Wars, though it was never used in the movies. I don’t know how many times in my life I’ve been in the wrong place at the wrong time, or if one believes in fate, perhaps I was exactly where I was supposed to be.
Each day is filled with choices, decisions, some huge, life-changing and others little, although who knows, they might be life changing as well.
Today is May the 4th, some may know it as Intergalactic Star Wars Day. For some, that’s everyday.
Nerds greet each other with, May the 4th Be With You. Posts, memes, parties, hash tags, sales, and news stories converge, in greater numbers.
Although this May 4th, the news is more about Princess Charlotte Elizabeth Diana than Princess Leia.
Tomorrow, to a lesser degree with Revenge of the Fifth, although I think Revenge of the Sixth makes more sense. Is that a thing?
An old nemesis has descended upon me this May the 4th – my Darth Vader, my Boba Fett, Jabba the Hut (probably rather have Pizza the Hut), Rancor (although it smells better), Greedo, or Count Dooku – I’ve loosely titled it, Stars Wars VIII: Return of the Back Pain. Luckily it doesn’t hurt as much when I sit…and if I go over to The Dark Side, I hear they have cookies.
I think I know what brought it on, an unusual activity (not nearly as exciting as it sounds).
It also brings back horrible memories of the car accident where the pain originated and I’m left to watch my back, like the aptly titled book, Watch Your Back! by Richard A. Deyo MD(Cornell University Press). I read this last time my back pain flared, hoping for some answers. It left me with more questions as it’s straightforward information shone a light on The Dark Side of the medical profession which offers people less and less, for more and more.
We don’t like to think that our pain is a business, but it’s big business.
This book won’t be popular, it points out that the medical profession, like politics and other systems, to paraphrase George Lucas, is like a great tree, able to withstand any external force, but rots from within. The lure of money, power, and prestige can overcome common sense and decency.
I understand the temptation of the magic fix, but realistically I know I have to do most of the figurative heavy lifting.
As patients we should be pushing for more treatments that are sensible, empowering, and give effective, long-term results for moderate costs.
I’m used to being in constant pain with Fibromyalgia, it waxes and wanes, but never actually ceases, but in a strange way pain can also be freeing. You see past the Jedi mind tricks or I guess more like Sith mind tricks…you see the truth.
What about you, dear readers, do you ever see The Dark Side of people when they think they can’t get anything from you?
Do you also see the power of The Force of goodness when some people like you just the way you are?
The latter is what I choose to believe in.
You can’t always get what you want. The Rolling Stones and parents have been telling us this for years, but they’re not all leading by example. The Stones at least qualified by saying, if you try sometimes…you might get what you need.
I was in a store the other day where a teeny-weeny tornado of a child, innocuously dressed in pink, yet she may well have been the spawn of something evil that came from the bowels of a very toasty place, was screaming at the top of her lungs that she wanted something. I believe it was a doll of some kind, but it was hard to tell as her words flowed together in one raging howl. Spittle flew from her small bow lips and her Dora clasped pigtails bobbed wildly as her neck precariously thrashed her tiny head back and forth in classic Exorcist style as she raged against the injustice of not having this toy.
The mother seemed to be holding firm until the volume of the pink virago threatened to shatter glass and then she did something unbelievable, that mother smiled, patted her banshee’s little blonde head and handed her the package, saying they should go pay for it before they went to get lunch at McDonald’s.
I stood, wavering between a slow motion ‘No-o-o-o-o-o-o!’, a facepalm, or standing mouth agape, doing my best impression of a codfish, as I realized the happy silence from the smiling little blonde angel was more deafening than her wailing.
I guess if you scream loud enough and in just the right way, you can always get what you want.
Make no mistake, adults are not exempt from tantrums, we just have them in different ways. We still want what we want when we want it and we want it now!
Our wants often yell louder than our needs. It’s why we date the wrong people, elect the wrong leaders, buy too much, spend too much time on the internet, lie, steal, cheat, overeat, and even make some Shameless poor choices, ok, most aren’t up to the Gallagher family, but our wants are that little blonde girl and our better judgment is that mother.
It’s easy to be so focused on the moment and forget, you shouldn’t be frothing at the mouth to get something.
Is this willingness to give in, to give free rein to our angry little want tantrums why so many people, even biologically adult people say life is unfair and that they hate their life? Life isn’t fair. Who told you it was? You hate their life. How is that even possible? No, you hate something that is happening in, or to your life. There are things I hate about my life, but I don’t hate my life. See the difference?
Yes, the bubblegum raging harridan also hated her life, because she couldn’t have a toy. Wow, red flashing lights for a massive overstatement, please file this under First World Problems.
A child in a refugee camp shivering, scared, and hungry may think she hates her life, but she really hates the situation. A child in a war zone may think he hates his life, but he really hates the effects of war. People in Nepal may feel they hate their life as they reel from the effects of a devastating earthquake, but hating your life over a toy? What’s the name of the doll, Sindy Shallow?
We should think about how much we have, not just about how much we want to have.
What exactly are we wishing for here, a world where everyone has everything? Then what would you wish for?
Keep wishing, keep dreaming, sometimes it’s the best part of a bad day.
Have you ever had one of those days, dear readers, when you’re so frustrated with yourself you don’t know whether to: cry; give yourself a time out; scream; give yourself a hug and say you’ll do better next time; or maybe all the above and not necessarily in that order?
Too many things I try lately are thwarted, either by circumstances, or by me responding to circumstances. I keep giving myself pep talks, but I have a suspicion I’m not listening very well.
Happiness is a choice. Apparently, this isn’t just a platitude or a wall plaque, according to researchers, happiness is really a choice (as well as a booming business). So instead of beating myself up for my utter failure today, I decided to go to a happy place and figure out how to reduce my stress. I’m not one for magical thinking, I like to believe in goodness, happiness, etc., but the realist in me knows that any broomstick I’m handed will come with a dustpan, not a flight into the moonlight.
Maybe today was a good day to read MeQuilibrium: 14 days to Cooler, Calmer, and Happier(Harmony Books) – wait, what, 14 days?!? That’s a long time, 2 weeks, a fortnight, half a month, I need help right now! Deep breaths, remain focused on the outcome, not the obstacles.
Ok, Jan Bruce, Andrew Shatte, Ph.D. and Adam Perlman, M.D., dazzle me with your wisdom. I hope the rest of the book is better than the title, sorry, it doesn’t really thrill me, but Blogging for Books wanted an honest review in exchange for the digital copy of this book, so ready or not, here it comes.
Day 1, sure, let’s pretend that’s today. This book has a lot of logical points, including changing the way you think about a problem or situation, although most I’ve heard in the labyrinth (ok, I just spelled that correctly for the first time in my life, things are looking up) of self-help I’ve traversed in my journey to now.
As I read about our Emotion Radar and how we scan and see situations and things, I had to squint as the light bulb over my head turned on. I went into this morning’s debacle looking through an ‘anxiety radar’, therefore, I saw things to be anxious about, then became more and more and more anxious, trapping a bunch of poor little monarchs in my stomach as my heart tried to smash through my ribcage.
This book, while well-written and easy-to-follow is basically a giant ad for their ‘wellness’ program, but that doesn’t rule out any a-ha moments (Excuse me, I need a moment to dance to a-ha’s Take on Me, don’t be shy, join me! As I watch this video again, there’s clearly a lesson to be learned – no matter how drawn toward someone you are, it’s probably a bad idea to go into a comic book just because the cute guy winks at you and extends his penciled hand).
Society has become busier and busier as we rush from one thing to the next to the next. We barely have time to breathe, let alone think. The answer might be to unlock our problem-solving room, go in and get calm, figure things out, before we fall into the stress traps.
As I reboot and relax listening to Duran Duran’s Save A Prayer then Billy Idol’s White Wedding (I moved on, but couldn’t quite leave that decade apparently) I realize, if I should stumble, I can catch my own fall. Perhaps I didn’t do as badly as I thought, in retrospect, I actually learned a lot from the experience.
In the dusty sanctuaries of erudition (cooler word than knowledge, which is sooo five centuries ago)… black and white, truth and lies live comfortably, side by side, lined up…we, elbow to elbow, heads bent, allow worlds to cascade around us. ‘Take us home,’ they whisper seductively, promising to reveal all their secrets.
Within the walls of a bookstore or library it’s clear what’s fiction and what’s non-fiction.
In the real world, not so much.
Some of you, dear readers might be aware it’s Autism Awareness Month. You may have Autism; know those who live with it; love those who live with it who you can’t live without; or know those you don’t even know are on the Autism Spectrum. Still with me? Good. Reading Me Being Me Is Exactly As Insane As You Being Youby Todd Hasak-Lowy(Simon Pulse) – we’ll get to the title in a minute – had me thinking of Autism’s infinite variety, as well as the still surprising amount of intolerance in the world.
12 things I thought about while reading this novel:
1. It’s all lists. I like lists.
2. The title is too long…oops, I’m one to talk.
3. The main character, a teen named Darren seems to be on the Autism Spectrum.
4. Part way through the book, I realized I had read other works by this author and felt a ‘doh’ moment. It passed.
5. The writing was accessible, appealing, and made me want to read more, yet around page 400 I found it was dragging and even I was growing tired of lists (is that even possible?).
6.Made me remember high school…Actually, I might be thinking of Glee, I don’t remember my high school having that much singing (luckily, this book doesn’t either). 7. Parents should care about themselves by caring for their children.
8. I wanted to buy Darren some ice cream and tell him, ‘O-o-h child things are gonna get easier. O-o-h child things’ll get brighter.’I have this Five Stairsteps song in my head, I blame Guardians of the Galaxy.
9. You can’t escape the world, it follows you everywhere.
10.Different can be bad or good, so much depends on intention and perception.
11. It might be comforting to tell someone things will get easier, brighter, or better, but it’s not always true. One of the best things to say is, ‘things are ok right now’. If that’s not true either, then, yes, by all means, say things are going to get easier, brighter, or better.12. I love books. I love free books in a different way. Refer to #10 and in this case, different is good.
Are teens and young people at risk for dreaming anymore?
Dreaming has become very expensive…and I think you need an app for it.
Boomers and Gen X were well-intentioned, wanting to give our children everything. Somehow it backfired and we’re leaving them with: a broken system, crumbling infrastructure, crippling debt, dubious morals, attention issues, a yawning wealth gap, a dying planet, corrupt governments and business.
Now in our defence, we also gave them: kittens on the internet, tons of fast food, and technology that might be destroying them.
Yet I’m still hopeful. Why? Because they are.
Many young people still want to try. They want to change things.
The media gives us the impression that all young people care about is
their smart phones, that they don’t vote, they’re unmotivated, or joining terrorist groups.
But that’s because the news is pandering – sensationalism rules.
Saving the planet isn’t sexy.
Trillions in unfunded liabilities (governments are happy if you don’t pay attention to things like this) is boring and incomprehensible.
None of this has ratings potential. Rarely goes viral. But it should. We need to stop focusing on the negative and sensational.
Have we removed our children’s ability to dream? I hope not.
Maybe it would help if we stopped calling them things like, Generation Screwed. That’s uplifting.
Profusely unemployed or underemployed, many live at home longer or return home. Debt, especially from student loans, is weighing them down. They need to have hope.
Generations like Millennials and Gen Z, have been given/offered/shown so much.
Their expectations are high. A new smart phone in their hand, and often. Big TVs, little laptops and tablets, a “nice” or really “nice” car to drive, fast food, clothes, trips, and so much more.
Yet when they get out into the world to earn enough to have those things themselves, they hit barriers – no jobs, part-time jobs, low-income jobs, outsourcing, and even their beloved technology is plotting to steal their jobs.
They’re told to: lower their expectations; accept the new normal; the low-hanging fruit has been picked; and society has reached a plateau. Wow, way to motivate.
That should be a Graduation Speech:
Knowing that society has reached a plateau and all the low-hanging fruit has been picked, we’re all going back home to live with our parents until we’re 40 or 50 or until they’re gone.
This is the new normal, having lowered our expectations of ever getting a decent job or a home. We accept this is the way things are. And in conclusion, please check out this viral video of a zebra that can paint its own toenails. Thank you.
Depending on where you are, this week is: Spring Break,March Break,March Madness,Spring Equinox,St. Patrick’s Day or maybe it’s just March.
So for our own form of March Madness, a Spring Fling to get us in the mood, let’s have a Blog Party!!!
Please use the comment box below to tell other bloggers about your blog –
don’t forget to include your blog link!
Tell us something about yourself and/or your blog
and share it so other bloggers will find out about you and everyone else!
I started this blog for relaxation (although sometimes, especially when WordPress makes changes, relaxation is not the word I use), but now, over 500 posts later, I look at my followers and views with wonder.
As a single mom with Fibromyalgia, raising a child with Autism and other health concerns, relaxation is important because most days I feel like Wile E. Coyote with his tiny umbrella.
I’ve learned a lot, but the best part has been my dear readers.
You make it all worth while.
Finding each other in this giant virtual haystack is astonishing and awesome.
I’d hoped it would also lead to fame and fortune; that part hasn’t panned out, but who knows?
Till then, still broke and just a tad less obscure.I’m thankful for all the awards I’ve received, but narrowing down other nominees has become too challenging as I find more and more astonishing bloggers whose insights thrill, stories chill, make me cry, laugh, smile, remember, make me think, wonder, and dream.
I love that you think of me, but my time and energy are limited so I’ll use them by responding to your comments and leaving some on your blogs, Tweeting, Retweeting, and sharing your posts.
I’d like to thank some of my most stalwart supporters, those of you who follow, take the time to press the Like button; who humble me by reblogging; Tweet and Retweet, share on Facebook, Google+, Reddit, LinkedIn, Pinterest,Tumblr and more. I find myself looking forward to your posts, comments, insights, loving your stories, glowing…
I just want to soak them all up.
Twitter @yadadarcyyada for some Hashtag parties: Sundays: #SundayBlogShare @suzie81blog Mondays: #MondayBlogs @MondayBlogs Wednesdays: #wwwblogs (Women Writer Wednesdays), and #BeWoW (Be Wonderful posts on Wednesdays @RonovanWrites) Saturdays: #ArchiveDay Any day with compassion: #1000Speak @1000Speak Weekends: #WeekendBlogHop @WeekendBlogHop
Excellent ways to find posts and bloggers.
So thank you all for a memorable time here on this big bouncy web.
Please don’t leave without sharing your blog link and info below,
so other bloggers can find you
and you can find other bloggers.
Keep checking back, who knows how long this party will last?
My own little teen Spock has been ill with a cold for the last few days.
Then the news today, Spock/Leonard Nimoy (most famous for Star Trek, but also a fascinating director/writer/photographer/singer, etc.) has passed away. It’s illogical to be so sad at the passing of an actor, but as a Trekker, Nimoy was in my life since I was very young.
Spock was also an early example of a character with qualities of Asperger’s Syndrome on TV. Asperger’s didn’t even have a name when Nimoy started playing Spock, but he showed that being different was cool.
I hope Gene Roddenberry’s vision of the future, where there will be less or no distinction between differences, comes true someday.
I think the biggest tragedy of our time is that people still have so many prejudices, especially about things they don’t understand.
They don’t know what they’re missing.
Most of us have known someone with: Stroke, migraines, CP, ALS, MS, Parkinson’s Disease, Alzheimer’s, Tetanus, Pinched nerve, meningitis, Huntington’s Disease, Migraines, Epilepsy, Polio,
or some other neurological disorder.
Imagine telling someone who’d suffered a stroke to just talk properly?
Don’t think so.
Telling someone with ALS to stop being so lazy?
No way.
Suggesting to someone with Alzheimer’s they could remember if they just tried harder.
Doubtful.
Or someone with Parkinson’s to stop shaking, that they were just trying to get attention?
Improbable.
Yet people with Autism are constantly told to:
grow up, smarten up, man up, stop being so lazy.
People scoff, blame, bully, abuse, mock, make jokes, call names, etc. Autism is a neurological condition just like any other.
They have as much control over how their brain works as any other neurological disorder.
If we could all just accept each other, we’d see the amazing.
And I see my teen Spock is awake again…
Goodbye Mr. Nimoy, you came into our hearts through our TVs; you made it cool to be different.
“That is the exploration that awaits you! Not mapping stars and studying nebula, but charting the unknown possibilities of existence.” ~Leonard Nimoy
I never wanted 2 cause u any sorrow (But I’m sad chipping ice off everything)
I never aimed 2 cause u any pain (I fell on the ice and hurt my, er, derriere)
I only fancied one time 2 see u laughing (But I’m not laughing)
I only wanted 2 see u laughing in the frozen rain (Can u even see me in this rain?)
Freezing rain Freezing rain Freezing rain Freezing rain Freezing rain Freezing rainI only wanted 2 see u sliding in the Freezing rain (that’s more than a little cruel)I never desired 2 be your lover (it’s not u, it’s me)
I only wanted 2 be some kind of friend (what kind of friend?)
Baby I would never steal u from another (probably not, but u could try)
It’s such a shame our friendship had 2 end (Hey baby, welcome 2 Dumpsville, Population: U)
I only wanted 2 see u in the freezing rain (What? Like a statue?)
Sunny, no, no, no, times are changing
Time to reach 4 something more Spring-like
Back off, winter, that u 2
U say u want to be a season?
But u can’t seem 2 make up your mind
I think u better warm up
And let me feel some warmer rain
Embark on a unique voyage through the uncharted waters of thought and discovery with Treasures of the Elysian Fields. Unveiling treasures of epiphanies, this blog is a tapestry of eclectic musings, transcending the ordinary to offer a memorable journey into the realms of introspection and revelation.