Here I am again, back, I’m a rubber ball that keeps bouncing back to you… What’s happened since I’ve been here last? What hasn’t, but what else is new?
Too many snowstorms. Too much time filling out forms. In the real world and not real and perceived dramas. In and out of various Self-Isolation fashions and pajamas.
The latest thing? “Bridgerton” on Netflix. Anachronistic version of “The Ton” for your Lockdown kicks.
Elections. Insurrections. Vaccines. Still traveling fiends.
Reddit blows the top off greedy hedge funds, pop, with AMC, Blackberry, and Gamestop! Poor little Wall Street traders Sad little corporate raiders
Bernie lookin’ cozy wearing sweaters now mittens Joe’s cheeks were rosy with memes all aglow Amanda, Gaga and JLo, Kindness can stay, the rest has to go.
New phone. Who dis? What else did I miss?
“The Queen’s Gambit”. Always knew chess was “lit”. New season of “The Expanse” I think space needs more plants.Christmas was merry, despite (you know)… finally, 2020 was hindsight (hope 2021 isn’t a new foe).
“Chronic Not Hopeless” trying to have some fun, not make a mess, I guess?!?
I’m knackered, the world is going “all to pot”, and I’m gobsmacked anyway, clearly time off was way too Britbox-packed.
When the laundry dings When the doorbell rings When I’m feeling sad, I simply watch/read my favourite stuff, And I don’t feel so rough (let’s be honest, there’s usually tea and chocolate involved as well).
Oh and in case you missed it, there’s still a pandemic, yup, more than a bit. So Stay Home (preferably under a dome?) and join us on Zoom for free, we’d love to see you, and you and you… there’s always plenty of room.
DM me…double mask me? When’s it gonna get to three?
OK, my rhymin’s a little loose It’s true I ain’t no Dr. Seuss I’m a Canadian, what do I know? We adopted a Chilean penguin and my best friend’s a moose.
Remember when I just threw in, “Chronic Not Hopeless” (see above), CNH is a volunteer “powered” weekly get together for people with Chronic Conditions, all are welcome. From anywhere, cause it’s on Zoom, Facebook, Twitter, Pinterest, Instagram, etc. Whether you’re from: Canada, America, UK, Australia, New Zealand, Antarctica, The North Pole, Spain, Japan, Sweden, Brazil, South Africa, Chile, Mexico – anywhere in the world! Anywhere in the Galaxy. Anywhere in the Universe. Free (though we accept donations, gratefully). Safe.
I know, I know, there are a billion “groups” out there, but this isn’t really a group.
Not a support group. Not an organization. Not a club. Not a hangout. So I’ve told you what it isn’t, so what is it?
It’s a bunch of friends and just-haven’t-met-you-yet-friends getting together to: chat, laugh, share, learn, connect, etc. Feel comfortable, stay in bed, on the couch, bad hair day, who cares? You want to do crafts, go for it. Want to drink and/or eat: coffee, iced coffee, hot cocoa, kombucha, pizza, pasta, beer, wine (be careful when drinking and Zooming – common sense and Stay-At-Home), sushi, soup, tea, water, juice, salads, cookies, cake, chocolate…well, whatever you want, or not.
We’re going to distract ourselves from our chronic conditions. We’re going to share resources, tips, tricks, life hacks about anything and everything. And we’re going to laugh. I can guarantee that. 😂
All that and more, in a drama-free zone. A place where you can get away from the everyday. You wanna go where everybody knows, or tries to remember, your name…where you’ll be glad you came.
Zoom version of pet therapy, maybe with your pets. 🐶🐱🐭🐰🐧🐦🦄🐍🐋🦧🐢🦎🐠🦖🦨🐹🐷 You’ll hear stories, maybe share yours (your choice if you do or don’t, whatever makes you feel comfortable). No pressure. No drama. No whining. We’re not hopeless. We’re not helpless. We’re still us. We’re not our chronic conditions, we’re you and me and more, who just happen to have one or more chronic conditions.
Stay tuned for announcements about FREE online activities, blog posts, Tweets, updates, resources, and so much more. Please follow this, our brand new “Chronic Not Hopeless” page https://chronicnothopeless.ca . Let’s make 2021 better together!🌠😀
“Chronic Not Hopeless” Bylaws (Enforceable Only By You)
Be Kind. Be Respectful.
Have fun. Laughter is healing.
Be discreet with information shared by others.
Remember, “agree to disagree”.
Share or don’t share. Camera on or off. Leave when you wish without need of explanations – we understand. Be comfortable.
Be present. Be pleasant.
Be aware of “hot button” topics, including but not limited to: politics, race, religion, The Great Pumpkin, etc.
Keep in mind, “Chronic Not Hopeless” is “powered” by volunteers with Chronic Conditions,. We will make missteaks, er, mistakes. We’ll forget things. Our entire life is a Mount Everest-style learning curve. We hope that even at our worst we always try to give you our best.
Feel free to contribute to “Chronic Not Hopeless” in any way you feel comfortable doing so. That could mean: sharing Facebook posts, Pinning on Pinterest, website pages or blog posts, Retweeting on Twitter, etc.
And/or donating via Ko-fi, Paypal, e-transfer to email@example.com , cash, etc., to pay for expenses CNH incurs such as: Zoom Pro so we can have online activities, the cost of the website, admin costs, etc. This is purely not-for-profit, run by chronically ill volunteers, grassroots community get together – we’re an open book(s).
Also, you can write blog posts, help with social media, contribute in any way your skills, energy, and heart can do. It could mean telling family, friends, professionals, co-workers, – well, anyone and everyone about “Chronic Not Hopeless – any and all help is greatly appreciated.
“Chronic Not Hopeless” is here for fun, for connecting, for helping – a drama-free zone. We gratefully accept and appreciate any donations – big or small, we love them all! Ko-fi.com/chronicnothopeless firstname.lastname@example.org We’re not hopeless. We’re not helpless. We’re still us.
Disclaimer for “Chronic Not Hopeless”: Please consult your physician if you have medical questions, before you start any exercise regime, any new medication, supplement, etc. and if you are feeling concerned about your physical, emotional and/or mental health. “Chronic Not Hopeless” is a community get together, not a substitute or source for medical advice. Any medical information found here is opinion and not endorsed by “Chronic Not Hopeless”. If you are feeling uncomfortable, please let us know and/or feel free to leave. We are here to help, not harm.
So you’ve heard this before, “I’m back”, but my heart was always here with you, I just couldn’t get my body to co-operate.
Yet during the holiday season we’re bombarded with images of social wealth.
Everything from: Family dinners, parties, drinks with friends, hugging, skating in pairs, walking together looking at lights, Secret Santa and gift exchanges, spontaneous snowballs fights, eating roasted chestnuts, and of course, people running into the arms of loved ones at airports…
But what if those things aren’t in your life?
The social media holiday barrage, Christmas FOMO (Fear of Missing Out), anticipointment (trademark?), Facebook, Instagram, TV, Google+, Twitter, MySpace (kidding, just wanted to see if you were paying attention) – all bursting with shiny images of happy people enjoying the holidays together. It can be overwhelming yet it’s only a day, like any other.
So if you find yourself less-than-surrounded by family and friends during the holidays,try to:
1. Marathon your way through the season, which apparently now begins…
The holiday season stresses out most everyone, but for those who are ill, the holidays can be a nightmare(before and during Christmas); it’s stressful for even those who don’t celebrate Christmas(or try not to celebrate).
The roads are busier. Malls overrun by zombies (We are The Walking Dead, but with brightly-wrapped gifts). Christmas songs drone on, but peace on Earth, really, there’s barely a pretense of civility.
So many Santas, ringing and ho-ho-hoing for money to buy toys – I thought there was a workshop and elves for that…
Expectations. Unrealistic expectations. Too much food (First World Problem).
Frolicking. Accidents. Frolicking accidents. Ugly Christmas sweaters (no longer ironic), now ironically iconic?
Gifts/gift cards/e-gift cards, “the perfect gift” for the “perfect” Christmas – that’s where stress-relievers come in.
First, take a deep breath. Christmas is one day.One.24 hours.1440 minutes. Let’s also enjoy the other 364 days in the year. Relax.
Second, the holidays should be about: giving, helping, hoping, kindness, compassion, and dreams; not pushing, whining, complaining, stressing and screams…Relax.
Third, you need to find out what works for you, what makes you happy, what brings you comfort and joy. If you don’t know that, how can you share it with others? Relax.
Here are some usual ways (and unusual, whatever that means) ways to relieve stress during the holidays (and all the year through)? There are more than 12 so you decide which is which.
If I’ve left some out and I’m sure I did, please comment to tell me what I missed and then share the post on social media so others can tell me what I missed as well…
Read books/ebooks (This is a safe space, no “books vs ebooks” arguments here; all books are welcome and accepted!).
Volunteer (I once knew someone who said more people would volunteer if they were paid, ummm, that’s a job).
Write a blog/journal/novels/poems.
Manicure/Pedicure (at home works too).
Bake (me a cake?).
Aromatherpy (Don’t limit yourself to the usual scents, whatever smells good to you, smell away).
Look for the Fibonacci symbol in nature or fractals, so fun on snowy days.
Design clothes.Wear clothes.Buy New-To-You clothes (Goodwill, Talize, Salvation Army, Value Village, Mission Store, and other Love-Them-Again stores are awesome).
Go see a play, be in a play, write a play, direct a play.
Look at the stars (the ones in the sky).
Plant yourself near a plant to reduce your blood pressure.
Karate (relaxed and ready to defend yourself, probably not against Ninjas or aliens, but maybe zombies or vampires).
Visit an art gallery/museum.
Stream (Netflix, Amazon Prime, Hulu, Apple TV, Disney Plus, Acorn TV, Crave, HBO, TMN, SlingTV, BritBox, and many more; with more popping up every day).
Play board games.
Play video games.
Play card games.
Stay and enjoy.
Do puzzles – crossword, boxed puzzles, puzzle boxes, find-a-word (Have you heard? The bird is the word), sudoku, logic, trivia and if you can figure out people, wow, you’ve solved the biggest puzzle ever.
Apply gentle pressure to the spot between your 2nd and 3rd knuckle, between your fingers, where your finger and hand meet to reduce stress.
Cheer someone up with a fun surprise (Do not break into their home and draw a happy face on the wall or anything in red lipstick on their mirror, apparently that’s considered “creepy”).
Wine/Beer tasting tour (Don’t taste and drive).
Learn some magic tricks (Be nice to rabbits).
Get/give a facial.
Watch the clouds (the ones in the sky).
Jump (jump jump jump around) on a trampoline (safety first).
Smile (I just like to smile, smiling’s my favourite).
Drink water (don’t waste it).
Create the next big fad! i.e. Lint kittens and puppies. Easy to keep – no walks, no food, soft and cuddly, and easy to house-train. Do not expose to water.
Join a team (fantasy or real).
Pet sit (don’t actually sit on a pet).
Tear paper (then recycle then tear again).
Visualize (guided or unguided, just remember to leave some breadcrumbs to find your way back).
Pay it forward.
Be kind (random or deliberate).
Fix stuff (fix something for someone: TV, car, fridge, cellphone, alarm system, computer, appliances, sewing machine, etc. Even it wasn’t broken, er, at the time, they’ll probably understand you were trying to give them a gift…probably).
Give your time.
Offer your knowledge.
Give your full attention.
When a child hands you a toy phone or a banana, answer it and have a conversation (best time with a phone/actually smart).
Take a shower (not at the Bates Motel).
Take a bath (not in a horror movie).
Enjoy social media for what it is not what you want it to be (because the internet).
Take some photographs (not just of your food and selfies with duck lips).
Ski-doo (not on thin ice…it’s all going to be thin ice soon).
Watch a sunset.
Watch a sunrise.
Cook (Combine food and fashion ie. Forget Lululemon, how about lasagna leggings? Pizza pants. Taco ties. Chocolate crop top. Wine wedding dress. Turkey tux. Beer boots. Hamburger hat. Curry coat. Steak scarf. Bacon blouse. This food fashion can be consumed at any time – hopefully not when you’re out in public).
Join a club (not a gang).
Drink green/white tea.
Walk in a park or the woods (not at night on a full moon, just in case).
Climb a wall, so you don’t climb the walls.
Laugh some more.
Make someone laugh.
Spend time with nature and animals (don’t pet grizzly bears, badgers, or snakes, start slow with cats, dogs, rabbits…then move up).
Build a snowman (do you wanna?).
Remember to forget.
Smash stuff (smash plates, bowls, walls, pumpkins,etc., and if you can’t go to one of the places where you pay to smash stuff, I’m sure family and friends will understand you need stress relief, especially during the holidays).
Make soap not dope.
String popcorn (the eat, the popcorn not the string).
Visit (real or virtual as long as you’re there, in the moment).
Watch TV (question what you watch).
Listen to someone.
‘Tis the season, cut down a Christmas tree for a busy family member or friend. Cautionary note, unlike in the Hallmark and other Christmas movies, cartoons, etc., apparently it’s “frowned upon”, some might even say “illegal”, to just randomly cut trees down. Who knew?
One of the best ways to relieve stress, being honest, with yourself and others; we/they/me/whoever may not appreciate it at first, but it could be the best gift ever, someday.
Chocolate. Enough said.
If you know me and/or you’re a reader of my blog (https://yadadarcyyada.com) you know, I think laughter is the best medicine and it certainly qualifies as a stress reliever. Laughing, even if it hurts sometimes, still makes me feel better. I go to a happy place, including but not limited to: Psych, George Carlin, Seinfeld, Community, Friends, Rick and Morty, The Office, Marx Brothers, Flight of the Conchords, and more.
I love to share the laughter. If I can make someone smile, laugh, giggle, chortle, spew liquid from their nose, then hey, I feel better. Get silly. Adulting is tough, who says we can’t be a kid at heart?
Finding ways to help others is a great stress reliever. It’s hard to think about your problems when you’re helping others with theirs.
There are an endless amount of causes out there, try to support those who really need it. Those who are hungry, scared, without shelter, without hope, being abused, ill, falling through so many cracks.
Donate to a cause in someone’s name instead of handing them another gift they may or may not need or want, or better yet, start a foundation in their name, I’m sure it won’t affect their taxes…much. Help yourself by helping others.
Knitting? Did I mention knitting? What I want to knit…a black cable knit sweater and a Doctor-Who-vintage-Tom-Baker-as-The-Doctor scarf. I’ve been talked down to scarf of one colour and even that’s not going well. The holes are there to let hopes and dreams in, yeah, that’s it. They’re a design feature.
Turns out knitting can be a “knotty” stress reliever.
Exercise is suggested for stress relief, but with pain and fatigue, exercise can be challenging. Years ago, someone suggested Tai Chi for Fibromyalgia/relaxation/arthritis/exercise, I thought, how would flailing my arms around, slowly, help with any of those things? I’ll just look weirder than I usually do.
Lifting weights? I’m no Schwarzenegger, but Hasta la Vista, babyweight (my son is in his 20s). I like Yoga (and Baby Yoda), but it can be painful. Walking helps, but my dogs start barking and the rest of my body growls at me.
I love swimming (not so much Aquafit), but getting there and back, dressing, undressing, showering, etc. is exhausting; I sometimes feel worse, certainly less relaxed (and it’s pricey). And of course these days, we’re not sharing any pools. Thanks COVID.
What else? For seniors, VON offers free programs twice a week, (SMART) Seniors Maintaining Active Roles Together; there’s Ageless Grace (more like Graceless Aging for me). I’ve tried the gym. Belly-dancing (don’t try to picture it). Dancing (Frankie says Relax).
Yet I stick like glue to Tai Chi because it unsticks me. Relaxes. Soothes. Feeling sore? Tai Chi won’t magically fix everything, but it helps ease some aches and gets you moving.
To learn Tai Chi I borrowed items from the library (having fun isn’t hard if you’ve got a library card). Later bought VHS tapes (yes, that long ago, I fought off a saber-tooth tiger to get home), then DVDs (now on YouTube and streaming services, soon to be uploaded into our brains).
Now I have fun with it, I pretend I’m carrying an invisible jar containing invisible chocolate, so I must guard it with my life. But seriously, once I opened my mind, body and heart to Tai Chi, it gave me a priceless gift – some pain and stress relief so I could have quality of life. I can dance again. Well, sort of. My version of it.
Remember, getting through one day (for example, Christmas Day) isn’t the same as finding and giving joy each day.What about you dear readers? What are some of the usual or unusual ways you know to relieve stress during the holidays and all the year through (remember this is a more or less family-friendly blog).
Wishing everyone a safe, happy and stress-free (ok, low stress/reduced stress) holiday season: Happy Holidays! Merry Christmas! ¡Felices Fiestas! Jie Ri Yu Kuai! Laethanta saoire sona! Happy Hanukkah! Joyous Kwanzaa! Yuletide Greetings! Best wishes for 2020! Joyeux Noël! Let it snow…somewhere else! Feliz Navidad! Seasons Greetings! Happy New Year Joy! Celebrate! Be merry! Shiawasena kyūjitsu!Boas Festas! Li holide eximnandi! Happy Christmas! Happy New Year! Wishing you a latke fun this Hanukkah! Hau’oli Lanui! मेरी क्रिसमस ! Forhe Feiertage! Selamat Hari Raya! Happy Channukah! Joyeuses Fêtes! Prettige Feestdagen! Buone Feste! Trevlig Helg! Jingle All The Way! Happy Holidays from owl of us! Tis the Season! Warmest greetings! Happy Holidays, Mate! It doesn’t matter how you say it as long as it’s said with kindness.
And the classic, “But you don’t look sick”. Feel free to add more. I think I’ve heard them all…but you never know.
99 Problems and Fibromyalgia (Fibromialgia) is all of them…or at least it makes any problem much much much much worse.
I won’t bore you with all the symptoms:
Extreme, endless fatigue (I’ve never heard, “everyone gets tired”…sigh).
Extreme, endless all-over-body-pain 24/7/365 (“everyone has pain, especially as they get older” – how do you presume to know my pain or anyone else’s pain but yours?).
IBS (Oh joy, love nothing more than talking about my bowels to doctors/family/friends/strangers/readers…”What did you want to be when you grow up?” “Constipated.”).
Depression (tough not to be depressed by all this).
Sleep issues (screw off Alpha waves, no one wants you here).
Mood disorders (maybe my many, many moods are just as ordered as they should be).
Restless leg syndrome.
Anxiety (pick a kind, any kind).
Tender points (misnomer, not tender, excruciating, but trigger points make sense).
Fibrofog (what was I saying?).
Memory and learning problems, like, aah, like, well, there’s Fibrofog (what was I saying?).
Scattered thoughts (dust in the wind, all my thoughts are dust in the wind).
Tingling (not the good kind).
Shakiness (not the good kind).
TMJ (Temporomandibular Joint Syndrome).
Painful and frequent urination.
You may notice a pattern here, #Pain!
Sharp pain, stabbing pain, dull aching pain, burning pain, throbbing pain (Beavis and Butthead laugh for 5 minutes now about “throbbing”).
Extreme sensitivity to: light, noise, sounds, smells, temperatures, humidity, dryness, changes in the weather (especially extreme heat or cold, fun in Canada, eh).
Also, to tastes, textures (Princess and the Pea was written about someone with Fibromyalia, for sure).
Stiffness (not the fun kind).;
Especially morning stiffness (not the fun kind).
Let’s not forget Allodynia.
Itching (like, bugs-under-your-skin-when-jonesing-kind-of-itching, er, for chocolate, my drug of choice).
Waking up feeling like you’ve been run over by a truck or attacked by a Terminator or zombie (brains?) – We are The Walking Dead.
And don’t even get me started on surviving the Holidaze, er, holidays – Christmas, New Year’s Eve, birthdays, Easter, Thanksgiving, Black Friday (it’s counted as a holiday now, right?), actually I can do CyberMonday, and they’re lined up to take me out for Valentine’s Day…
I could go on and on (really), but you get the point.
What can anyone do to try to help chronic suckage?
Pills/medications (anti this, anti that, pro this, pro that, SSRIs, SNRIs, NSAIDs, PB&J – checking if you were still paying attention, lotions, notions, rubs, gels – not the fun kind – vitamins, supplements, opioids, snake oil, gargoyle oil, and on and on).
Deep breathing (keep breathing).
Tai Chi (saved my life).
Change of diet (I do FODMAP, look it up, you’ll hate it).
Massage (no happy endings).
CBT, CBD, CBC, CBA, COD…
It’s all just fleeting moments of feeling almost human.
And if all wasn’t bad enough, many people assume this invisible disability is and let’s see if I have this right, a conspiracy wherein the medical profession has effectively implemented a fake syndrome just to cater to lazy people (wasn’t that nice of them?). Perfectly reasonable, it’s not as if doctors have anything better to do. Or have reputations and licenses to protect. Or have ethics. What exactly would their motivation be? Why make up an illness, aren’t there already enough? Cancer alone should keep them hopping.
There are many health issues that can not be found through standardized testing, for example: Multiple Sclerosis, ALS, Cerebral Palsy, Parkinson’s, Autism, Lupus, ADD/ADHD, wheat or gluten ‘sensitivity’, acute back pain, as well as many mental health issues. So they don’t suffer, don’t feel – it’s all some magical conspiracy…
People like to mock. I get that. It’s become a past-time, even a job for some people, especially in the internet age. I also get those same people would want/expect doctors and people to believe them if they were ill, even if there was no standardized testing for their illness.
To the best of my knowledge, there’s no standardized testing for ignorance or stupidity yet either, but I’d buy stocks for that booming business.
I didn’t ask to be ill. Given the choice I’d be “normal”. I certainly didn’t ask to be mocked and harassed because I’m ill. Even if it was just ‘in my head’, shouldn’t anyone with a health issue be treated with dignity and respect? Maybe we need a standardized test for intolerance.
So how do I cope with ongoing agonizing pain, debilitating fatigue and all the other heaping piles of steaming sh*t that comes with Fibromyalgia aka chronic suckage? If you’re a reader of my blog you know, I think laughter is the best medicine. Laughing even if it hurts sometimes still makes me feel better. I go to a happy place like Psych or George Carlin, Seinfeld, Friends, The Office and more. Tons of laughter a day doesn’t keep the doctor away, but it gives me some quality of life.
For example, this was one of my Tweets last week, “When I see a thong in a store all I think is, how would I explain to #EMTs all my multiple injuries were caused by just trying on a thong. Huh. #ThatsHot #thongs“. @yadadarcyyada
I love to share the laughter. If I can make someone smile, laugh, giggle, chortle, spew liquid from their nose, then hey, I feel better. Treatments, medications, family, friends and finding a community that gets you, that understands when you have to cancel plans (again)…
Or you can’t remember, ummm, can’t remember, er, huh…and the only good thing you can say about your day is you’re “above ground”, well, anyway.
Glad there are people around who understand, including but not limited to: the-words-are-not-enough-to-describe-how-wonderful-they-are-Fibromyalgia Group, I’ve even tried to knit (What?!? Please note the word, “tried”).
Reunited with a fantastic friend from college (we’d lost touch when the dinosaurs died), and get this, we started going to the same Fibro group on the same day, from different cities. I don’t know what they call that, fate, destiny, providence, kismet, but I call it cool and lucky.
Finding ways to help myself by helping others.
The thing is, people are just people – no matter how rich or poor; sick (this is an equal opportunity destroyer) or well; all sizes, shapes and shades; known or unknown – you don’t know what you’re missing if you don’t give people a chance. Some will let you down, disappoint, hurt your brain, your heart, your body, but they’re oddly beneficial, they help us appreciate the good ones even more.
Get out there, in person, online, by phone, text, email, do stuff, I don’t know, play cards, smile, knit, donate (give what you can, including your time and talents), bowl, cuddle, talk, sign, sing, walk, dance,embrace your crapathy https://yadadarcyyada.com/2016/05/25/crapathy/,
swim, skate, scuba (gate?), especially smile at children, jog, blog, snog (probably not at the same time unless you’re uber talented), ignore, don’t keep score it’s a bore, read, write, compose, doodle, paint, play, bike, hike, “Like”,bake (me a cake? https://yadadarcyyada.com/2016/09/16/you-had-me-at-cake/),
listen, learn, love, add to the world, be part of the solution, go out with friends, care, share, spend time with family, get to know people, smile some more (and more and more and more)!!!
Consider others, let your mind soar. I can’t say you won’t ever be sorry, some folks are baffling, but on a whole, you’ll be better for it (and they will be too).
Not asking anyone to feel sorry for me (although compassion and empathy are always welcome), just a reminder that everyone has problems, 99 or less, 99 or more, just because we can’t see them doesn’t mean they aren’t there…so don’t be one of those problems.
I wanted to be with you alone (on the internet?). And talk about the weather (What is the deal with the weather? Pick a season, stay with it til the next one). But traditions can’t be traced (or can they, again, the internet). We get tricked when we only stick with our base.Nothing keeps our attention… We’re lost in admiration, could we need it this much?Oh, is it wasting time? Just, just, just wasting time. Something happens and we’re head over heels. We never find out till we’re head over heels…
We ‘humans’ fall head over heels quickly, with: people, pets, passions, movies, books, songs (I’m still on a Tears For Fears kick although The Cars too, goodbye Ric Ocasek, you were just what we needed), politicians, celebrities, television shows, smartphones and other electronic gadgets and gizmos, cars, causes, friends, fads, flights of fancy…
And when we fall out of love, look out, love can quickly turn to hate (and shouldn’t continue to date, not great).
I do it…I fell in love with blogging (I didn’t fall for it, it tripped me). My bloglove hasn’t turned to hate, but indifference creeps in, then slinks out, but I know it will back and in greater numbers.
I still love my readers, other bloggers, but sometimes I wish I knew how to quit you (or me, or WordPress, or the internet).
I’ve fallen hard for another Australian series (https://yadadarcyyada.com/2014/09/06/miss-fishers-murder-mysteries/ or is that just gravity talking?), this time, “The Heart Guy” aka “Doctor Doctor”. A brilliant bad boy cardiac surgeon gets sent home, as a punishment, to practice medicine in his hometown, Whyhope. Naturally, things get complicated fast. Rodger Corser (In “Glitch” as well, S3 is about to crawl out of the ground soon) may play the lead, Dr. Hugh Knight but his cast-mates are bright shining lights cutting into any and all plans. Why hope? Why not? Another season has been approved and I’m cheering. Yahoo! For Canadians this dramedy reminds me a bit of “Corner Gas” with more actual drama and for the U.S., like “Seinfeld” but with less New York snark and more Down Under snark.
I’ve got one of cupids arrows stuck deep in my heart (could explain chest pains, besides the Tietze Syndrome) for writing and reading then writing some more. Will I ever be an author, a real live published author, as many of my talented fellow bloggers are, as so many writers are, who knows, but it’s fun slow blogging and writing the world’s best novels…in my head.
Captivated with “The Handmaid’s Tale”. Thank you to the parents of Margaret Atwood and Elisabeth Moss for giving us such gifts. It’s funny to think I first read this book almost 35 years ago, when I naively thought it was fiction and thank goodness this could never happen. Note to self, never say never. If you haven’t started reading one of Canada’s most precious natural resources, Margaret Atwood, I suggest you love yourself enough to begin your journey. I’ll continue with her latest, “The Testaments”, filled with hints of things to come. https://yadadarcyyada.com/2019/03/25/welcome-to-your-life/
sunsets, puppies, pizza (note the coma, grammar saves lives, in this case, adorable puppy lives), Downton Abbey, The Addams Family, ancestry, kindness, songs https://yadadarcyyada.com/2019/02/06/dont-stop-me-now/ , friends, a new love (who doesn’t have to but if he looked like Negan, Starlord or Daryl Dixon that would be cool, just as completely random examples), muffins, laughter, strawberries, donuts, chocolate, chocolate donuts, kindness, cupcakes, family, and oh yeah, to write another chapter in my own story.Why suffer from FOMO, you’ll never miss out if you embrace the glorious chaos of life (every day above ground is another chance) https://yadadarcyyada.com/2016/10/14/the-glorious-chaos/
Beguiled by apocalyptic, post-apocalyptic, and dystopian anything (“anything” may be hyperbole, but that’s how things work now, right, facts begone, trouble us no more with your truthiness!),
I’m caught up on “The 100” (“May we meet again”); I miss “Colony”, “Helix”, “Falling Skies”, “Z Nation”, “Extant”, “Ascension”, “Revolution”, “V”, “iZombie”…but mostly I miss when watching/reading about this stuff was wildly fictional. But I guess, like horror, it’s a safe way to examine our fears without admitting they’re coming true. This is how we live now.
Enraptured by the final season of “Game of Thrones” (finally caught up with a free preview month). As a fan, little disappointed, as a writer, loved it, so I’m going with the latter.
My heels are over my head with anticipation, sure, things/people seem divided (remember, fear shrinks the brain), we have an economy based on endless consumerism, making ourselves miserable, envious, dissatisfied, ok, things can seem a tad hopeless right now…
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Stereotyping is the scourge of our time. All women are this, all men are that, good guys always win, life is fair, fat people are lazy…religion, race, wealth, poverty, sex,diets, politics, illness – everything is painted with the stereotype brush…wait, did I just stereotype stereotyping? Make no mistake, hate is the easy way. Different = Hate. Don’t agree with you = Hate. Blame everyone for your problems. Don’t change, just dig in. Lies, make them big, no, small won’t do. Feed them what they want to hear, while they pretend to care about those they hold dear.
You must remember this A kiss is just a kissA lie is still a lie The fundamental things apply As time goes by
And when politicians woo They still say “I love you” On that you can rely No matter what the future bringsAs lies goes by
Promises of jobs and tax cuts Never out-of-date Tapping into bias with a passion
Spilling jealousy and hate
It’s an age-old story,
over love and glory.
We pick and choose
what truths to hold self-evident…
her truth, his truth,
my truth, your truth, the truth…
flippity-floppity, they can’t all be true.
That no one can deny
It’s still the same old story A fight for love and glory A case of do or die The world will always welcome liars As time goes by…
Storytelling, once used to pass along useful information, to keep people safe or make their lives easier. Cavegal/Caveguy didn’t recount that story about almost being eaten by a Saber Tooth tiger to get Retweeted, or get Likes on Instagram. Nor did they stop to film it, or get a Selfie #catscratchfever No, she/he told exciting tales, not to get attention, to influence, to build her/his brand, but to warn others not to go picking berries on that path where those tigers live #berryscary #noyabbadabbadooforyou
We’re addicts, we need another fix. Oh we can stop anytime, we don’t need it, then a ping, a new text, email, tweet, update, tag, post, whatever. We’re all about the yarn, the tale, the story…We crave all the grimy little details, especially the ones that sound like they could be real, the facts say otherwise, but they’re boring, tell us more about the lies, fraud, sex, the scandal of it all, no matter how insane or impossible it seems…tell us more, more, more! Is it true? Who cares? Jump on that bandwagon wherever it may take you. Why worry, got to get another hit. As long as we get our momentary rush, who cares about the consequences?
Do people even want to rule the world anymore, or are they content to just stare at a screen and watch the world burn, as long as they can feed on the flames of the story as we crackle? Remember the good old days when there used to be a line-up to rule the world: aliens, supernatural beings, crime lords, hackers, scammers, Dystopian Future leaders seem especially bent on keeping control (time is fleeting…),megalomaniacs with delusions of grandeur, terrorists, corporate terrorists, politicians, super villains (better than average villains or just wearing capes?), Huns, Hordes (so many Hordes),puppets, paupers, pirates, poets, pawns and kings (they’ve been up and down and over and out and they know one thing, each time they find themselves flat on their face, they pick themselves up and get back in the race), and who can forget Vikings, evil scientists, and laboratory mice whose genes have been spliced (sounds painful and wrong – free Pinky and The Brain!).
But for those who still have an interest in ruling the world, here’s an Easy Peasy guide:
Make someone’s day with a smile or a kind word. Do something they need, not just someone you think they need. Help them as they need help.
Be part of the good, even if it means not taking that tempting/way-too-easy dig at someone (just as a completely random example, Donald Trump).
Jump rope, Jump Force, Shonen Jump, Jump Jump Jump Around (I Came To Get Down), Jump Up and Down for Joy, jump-start your day, jump-start a car – just don’t jump to conclusions.
See the world from someone’s else point of view, even on their worst day. Then someone else. And someone else. The sky’s the limit and maybe not even then.
Care. Don’t just pretend to care. Do it, surely it must take the same effort, right?
Don’t attack, don’t react – act on your best instincts.
Do something you didn’t think you could do. Except murder. Don’t do murder. Or anything else bad, let’s start again, do something good you didn’t think you could do.
Grow food instead of a portfolio.
Be yourself. Unless you can be Groot, then be Groot (I am Groot).
Laugh (I’ll help, Jann Arden has a comedy series, Jann – watch, laugh, repeat). Cry (or laugh and cry thanks to Ricky Gervais, his Netflix series, After Life may just change your life, it changed mine). Dream, wonder, rejoice – seriously, if you’re still not watching The Orville, I, I, I just don’t…So go ahead and feel, feel frustrated, sad, lonely, happy, hopeful, hopeless, scared, joyful, jealous, disappointed, angry, but don’t think those feelings are facts; just to reiterate, feelings are not facts.
Show and share compassion, patience, empathy, understanding – all the money spent on piles of flowers, stuffed animals, balloons and candles, the endless moldering memorials – give that money to those in need. Isn’t that a better way to remember those who have been lost?
Offer your support and some Random or Not-So-Random Acts Of Kindness, but try something different, if you’re in line for coffee, you can afford a coffee (or think you can, that’s a whole other issue), the only kindness you’re giving is to the coffee place. Give that money to those in need, not just in need of a caffeine fix.
Comfort, inspire, don’t require something in return.
Anger, greed and fear are so tempting, calling a siren’s song, ‘give in to me, it will feel soooo good’ and it could, briefly, but it hurts others; if that makes you feel good, you need some serious help.
Be part of something kind. Easy to pick on someone, more work to pick them up. Instead of rising to the bait, rise together.
Share something you want to keep all to yourself, for me, chocolate (they’ll have to pry it from my cold dead hands, then again, if I share, we’ll both be in bliss).
Answer a child’s toy phone instead of your phone. Be there, in the here and now, tomorrow isn’t certain, but I’m certain we should be enjoying today. Welcome to your life, there’s no turning back so let’s enjoy a world where there’s enough for everyone – enough food, enough shelter, enough kindness, enough hope, enough compassion, enough love.
This blog post brought to you today by Donna’s Brain, now filled with 100% more:
Tears For Fears.
Toy Story (4, 5, 75, whatever, just keep ’em coming, we’ll watch, we promise).
Frank Sinatra (anyone else feeling a Rat Pack vibe these days?).
The Walking Dead (more Negan please, gots to get me a Jeffrey Dean Morgan fix).
Agatha Christie – the new Ordeal By Innocence – go catch some red herring.
Organization (shouldn’t that be a four-letter word?).
Buffy (RIP Luke Perry).
The Orville (stop taking breaks, work 24/7 365 please and thank you).
Kindness (it really does matter).
Harry Potter (I don’t know if the Sorting Hat could figure me out right now).
Avengers (and of course, Guardians of the Galaxy – I get it, I still listen to my Walkman).
E.T. (Text home?).
Supernatural (300 has a whole new meaning, they get my jonesing for some JDM and pizza).
The Handmaid’s Tale (as we start to live it we should accept that good people don’t always win, but that doesn’t mean they should stop being good and yes, some rich people believe the ‘screw the rules I have money’ motto, but money doesn’t equal right just right now).
Exhaustion (is there a place past exhaustion, like mega-exhaustion?).
Secret City (is this a series or a documentary, it’s so difficult to tell anymore…).
Books (more on that later).
Why is it every Spring I feel (doesn’t make it true) like I need more socks, pizza (did I already mention pizza, it’s worth another shout out, right?), donuts,Gilmore Girls, maybe Easter eggs (only the chocolate ones, I can have eggs anytime) and cake.
Thinking of how fix the root causes of all the anger, hate, loneliness, trauma; compassion.
Game of Thrones (anyway to get Jason Momoa back in flashbacks, time warps, something?).
Psych (why aren’t they bring this show back, at least a movie or limited run series, come on, I’m desperately in need of a happy place!).
Change (not all change is good, not all change is bad).
The Good Fight (keep it up).
SEO, streaming, dreaming, superheroes, raw water, CBD-infused anything and everything, detox, botox, Cheetos dust (is that a must?), ruffles, truffles, bigger phones, smaller minds, ALF, BTS, Bill and Ted (what’s the newest Excellent Adventure, finding their dentures?), cryptocurrency, Wikileaks (maybe they just need WikiDepends), Julian Assange, rading #Area51 (#StormiArea51), self-driving cars (scare me less than drivers driving cars), flying cars (still not as scary as people driving cars on the ground), goat yoga (yoga goat?), inflated lips, inflated hips, inflated prices, fanny packs are back (what?!?), Momo, CYA, Apple (is it really an #AppleEvent without Steve Jobs? Maybe Tim Apple will be there, would Tim Cook be a cooked apple, but I digress.), FOMO, Snapple, GMO – oh no, my brain is melting;
Ultravox and pancakes and not necessarily in that order.
Boomtown Rats and Queen (feeling a Live Aid vibe here).
U2 (What if I found what I was looking for and didn’t know that’s what it was?).
Downton Abbey followed by the urban sequel, Downtown New York Abbey.
Stranger Things (welcome to my life).
Murder (not doing it, writing about it or reading about it or watching it, wait, I’m sensing a theme).
Why the birds are conspiring to sing their ‘songs’ outside my window, exactly what subliminal messages are they putting into my brain… I’ve been going through some stuff as you see from my ‘slow blogging’, but not slow braining, but I keep bouncing back,Don’t Stop Me Now https://yadadarcyyada.com/2019/02/06/dont-stop-me-now/I guess the biggest thing I’ve been struggling with, concerning blogging and social media is, am I part of the problem, am I an enabler? Am I feeding the beast? I try not to, but readily admit, I’ve had varying degrees of success. I move forward with a new resolve…I hope.
Glad to be back and always to be here with all of you.
Big bloggy hugs and welcome to your life, young, or old, or in between, the rest is up to you.
Bees’ll buzz and I’ll afford their organic honey cuz…I’ll be doing whatever rich and famous folks do…Sportin’ a healthy bank account, not blown away by emergencies. Da da… Da doo…A bah bah ba baba boo! Attention and money are both so intense Put ’em together, it never, ever makes sense! Rat dadat dadat dadat dadadadadoo Anonymity’s the best time to stay in and cuddle, but put me in ‘attention’ and I’ll be a happily overexposed attention wh…oh, umm, writer/blogger!So when life gets rough, I persist by frantically grabbing my dreams of not just wallowing in obscurity…Oh the sky will be blue and you guys’ll be there too!!! When I ever do what obscure folks do with attention!
3. Shocking still not getting enough clicks, likes, and shares in this attention economy? Try no-no-Notorious (sorry, Duran Duran apparently still holds some mysterious thrall over me).
4. Are you feeling like you should keep a single thought, event, or moment private? This is your dignity and self-respect rearing its ugly common sense head, don’t self-sabotage! Tell all! Show all! Don’t let fear of failure stop you from succeeding in your attention-seeking goals.
5. Toss aside burdensome personal and professional relationships – more will come along and if not, you still had your brief, precious moment in the spotlight.
6. Be committed! This isn’t a diet, gym membership, Netflix browsing (what day is it?), friendship, job, or relationship – this is serious! Getting attention isn’t for the faint of heart.
7. Stop looking for the meaning of life, you found it: getting attention.
8. Helping people is nice, but what if you can get attention while doing it? Fire, flood, famine, family, friends, fawning, fatuous, fake fads – all the new attention-grabbing fabulous!
9. Your life is for sale, stick a sign on you that says ‘Sold’.