Tinnitus Awareness Day (oh, I’m “aware” of it every day!)
2022 is not a Leap Year, so February 2022 has only 28 days, oh no, but hopefully not 28 Days Later, fast zombies are scary, speaking of, guess who’s coming back and with fast zombies, “The Walking Dead”. February has more, but I don’t want to be a bore!
Watching: “The Gilded Age”, “Midsomer Murders”, “1883”, “Snowpiercer”, “Stay Close”,“What We Do in the Shadows”, “Shetland”, “The Expanse”, “Vera”, “The Great”, “JoJo’s Bizarre Adventure”, “The Eternals” (we’ve waited 7000 years for this movie, ha, Marvel/Disney, more like it felt like 7000 years watching this movie, wow); waiting for the return of “The Walking Dead”, waiting for the return of “The Orville”, waiting for common sense/#kindness to poke it’s head out and return us to a better reality.
Here’s what’s happened so far…
In August, it was a difficult decision, but I had to break up with myself
In January I shared ways I’ve learned to save money, of course, if there was affordable housing and even slightly less corporate greed scraping pennies wouldn’t be as necessary. People’s health would be better, physical as well as mental health.I also did a presentation about how to save money for “Chronic Not Hopeless”, a grassroots support group for people with chronic conditions, here for each other because when one of us shines, we all shine.
Contact/get links to Zoom events/volunteer/suggestions/questions/resources/donate:
Ever heard ’em say you gotta live like you’re dyin’? I better get on, cause time’s a-flyin’, yeah Lyin’ in my bed at night I’m thinkin’ What if? What if…? Guess it’s not too late This heart is still a-beatin’
Hate livin’ a “woulda shoulda coulda” life. Can’t go back in time, no DeLorean, no TARDIS. Gotta move forward, even through the endless strife. What if, what if, what if is too big a miss.
Maybe I gotta dream a bit bigger Burn a bit brighter Dig a bit deeper Reach a bit further Love a bit harder
Wanna go ahead with no what ifs. Wanna move ahead with no what ifs.
What if…? Those two little words carry soooo much baggage…
Suitcases full of regret.
Carry-ons stuffed with yesterday’s woes.
Trunk of troubles.
Duffel bags filled with heads full of sorrow.
Portmanteau of problems.
Valise of grief.
Chest of contrition.
Gladstone bag of self-reproach.
Attache of shame.
Briefcase of emotional bruises.
Luggage of loss… What if, what if, fillin’ ’em up or toss them out?
Marvel asks the question, “What if…?” each week in their Disney+ series, “What if…?”, reminding us that one choice, one moment can change things forever…
Yet in this “golden” age of social media, instant gratification, and rushing, rushing, rushing (did I mention rushing?), we think less and less about how one moment, one choice can affect us and so many others. We get caught up in being heard, seen, being right, being busy, we forget to stop and think about others. It’s terrifying how little we think of how our choices affect others. Truly terrifying.
We forget the most important rule, do unto others…what you’re saying, what you’re doing affects not only you, but many others.
They say you gotta be brave, you gotta be bold, you gotta be wiser. But what if your bravery is hiding in the closet? What if your boldness is taking an extended vacation? What if your wisdom has been elected Mayor of Dumbtown?
You gotta be hard, you gotta be tough, you gotta be stronger. What if you’re ooey and gooey? What if you’re as flimsy as a politician’s promise? What if you’re as weak as an adorable fluffy kitten without the adorable or fluffy parts?
You gotta be cool, but what if your brain feels like it’s on fire? You gotta be calm, what if your life is an F5 Tornado? You gotta stay together, but what if you’re shattering into a million little pieces?
This month I’m trippin’ down the yellow brick road, tryin’ to find myself a brain, a heart, some courage, and a home. That “home” part may confuse those who know I just moved a couple of months ago. Yes, but sadly some aspects of my new home that would have helped me make an informed decision about moving into this torture chamber apartment, were, er, withheld. One of the biggest withholds, the icing on the crap cake…As of September 1st, new “neighbours”/post-secondary students (though I’ve called the entitled little blanks a whole lot of other names in the past few weeks). I’ve witnessed streaking and public urination…ugh. What else?Fights, extremely loud music (and not the good stuff), lack of social distancing, sharing red plastic cups, cigarettes, bottles…no masks, no brains, no hope. I weep for the future.
I’ve sadly had to cut back the activities of my support group, “Chronic Not Hopeless”https://yadadarcyyada.com/2021/01/30/chronic-not-hopeless/, we’re suffering from terrible migraines, lack of sleep, anxiety, and so much more. This isn’t just a nuisance, it’s hurting our health. But what to do? Say F it and live in a shoe?Nope, instead, we’re moving…again.
Instead of finding peace of mind, I’m backed into a corner, talkin’ to myself, cryin’ to myself at night. Filled with regret. Back and forth through my mind. Feelin’ like I lost a cosmic bet. And the feeling coming from my bones says, “Find a home”…
I’ve sadly learned/relearned important lessons.
1) People don’t always tell you everything you need to make an informed decision and that can cost, physically, emotionally and fiscally.
2) This pandemic was never about saving the elderly, flattening the curve, stopping the spread. It was never about masks or vaccines. Lost lives, lost jobs, lost homes, lost health, so much loss. All the sacrifice. All the heartache. All the trauma. All so people could party.
When the world smashes down on you…When people lie to you, how do you believe again? What if we all just treated each other with decency? What if we thought about others? What if instead of arguing about masks, vaccines, race, religion, medications, elections (broken systems), celebrities, and so much more, why not agree to disagree and try to make life better instead of so much worse?
This blog post inspired by some of my usual things, aka: chocolate; family; friends; music – my mind is simply a never-ending playlist; tea, hot chocolate, tea and more tea; romance novels, mystery novels, any kind of novels and non-fiction, ok, let’s be honest, I’d read the side of a cereal box – me likey words!);“The Walking Dead”, “Fear The Walking Dead”, “The Walking Dead: World Beyond”(I sense a pattern here but what oh what could it be?); sooo many documentaries;“Murder She Baked”, er and Wrote;“Mystery 101”; “McDonald and Dodds”; computers…anyone looking forward to the new“Downton Abbey”movie? And added to my unusual brainwaves:
Marvel’s “What If…?”, of course; “Only Murders in the Building” (Star/Disney+)- if you enjoy a good mystery, this one is full of “what ifs” and “whodunits” – enjoyable performances by Steve Martin, Martin Short, Selena Gomez with guest appearances by Sting and Tina Fey; entitled brats; kindness (we need more, more, more); hidden traps; rain (what if we blame it on the rain?); pumpkins;
And yet more, um, stimulus? Matthew West; Des’ree; Queen, White Stripes;“Cruella” (Emma Stone and Emma Thompson are awesome but the movie itself, sigh, way too long, probably like this post);
What else inspired this post besides emptying my brain, er, I mean, “ER”…Generally really good, lots of great starsand would-be stars.
And I might be wrong but I think maybe I could do some mediciney-type stuff now, it seems to mostly involve saying things like: “Get me a crash cart!”,“Crits are down!”, “Are you my appendix? Because I feel like I should take you out.”, “Pulse ox is stable!”, “Coding” (so much coding), “I should take your temperature because you’re looking really hot!”, “I’d specialize in you anyday…”, “She’s getting tachy!” (or was that Real Housewives?), “You look a little down, maybe you need a a shot of Vitamin ME!”, “I can’t wait to sleep cause ICU in my dreams every night”, ok, wait, most of those are just me thinking of George Clooney, Noah Wyle and Goran Višnjić, umm, gulp, nevermind;
And still more… “Roswell: New Mexico”; “Secrets of Skinwalker Ranch”; and wow, “The Suicide Squad” – 2021, with the help of James Gunn, DC finally got it right. “The Suicide Squad” is an R-rated cousin of The Guardians of the Galaxy, um, on crack? Margot Robbie rules as Harley Quinn aka Daddy’s Little Monster with fun/surreal bits from: Nathan Fillion, Peter Capaldi, John Cena, Sylvester Stallone (“Nom nom?”), Pete Davidson, Idris Elba, Daniela Melchior, Michael Rooker, David Dastmalchian, Taika Waititi, Sean Gunn, and the weasel (also Sean Gunn).
And of course, what always inspires, ice cream, way too much ice cream (is that a thing, way too much ice cream?);
Some other things that wandered into my life… “Midnight Mass” (Netflix) –Mike Flanagan nods to Stephen King – in a “what if” wonderful mind mess, with a great soundtrack. “Midnight Mass”, “Haunting of Hill House”, “Haunting of Bly Manor”, “Hush“, etc., hmmm, I wonder if being born in Salem, Massachusetts influenced Flanagan to create and direct his horrors...
I took another bite out of the “Santa Clarita Diet”; thankful Drew Barrymore and Timothy Olyphant make the undead so delightfully delicious.
And cookies, they never fail to motivate me, how about you?
I like to think people, books, TV shows, movies, etc. come upon you not when you need them, but when you can find something in them you need. For me, “The Starling” contained this message: some things are out of our control. I knew this, of course I knew this, yet sometimes I need to be reminded of certain things. Melissa McCarthy, Chris O’Dowd, Kevin Kline, Timothy Olyphant, Daveed Diggs, Skylar Gisondo, Loretta Devine don’t disappoint in this intense, with moments of levity, but to be sure, intense, dramedy. The subject matter, grief, is a very personal and should be treated with care. Why not treat everyone with care?
My biggest inspiraton? Autumn/Fall, my favourite season: Halloween, Thanksgiving, pumpkins (except pumpkin spice, I’m gonna say it, don’t like it, can we still be friends? I support your pumpkin spice love, if that helps); the crisp air and even crisper apples; the gorgeous ever-changing leaf show; soft sweaters; softer throw blankets; comfortable walks…
“There is no point in using the word ‘impossible’ to describe something that has clearly happened.” === Douglas Adams
It happened and I let it happen. Not once, twice, or thrice, but over and over again. As impossible as it seemed, I let my life, wait, “let” seems too passive, I actively participated in the over-complication of my life.
Oh, I told myself I was simplifying. I did all the “right” things. I organized, sorted, classified, tidied, de-cluttered…tried to keep only things that sparked joy.
Yet my life felt like I was just moving round those deck chairs on the “Titanic” (there was room on the board for Jack, Rose, remember, never let go?).
Then complications, on tiny clawed feet creep, whether or not I leave them a treat…
1. First stage of grief – denial. In denial my life was that complicated. Ihad balls in the air, juggling like a clown; I like helping people laugh (I’m a bit of a Joker), but clowns wear too much make-up, for mypersonal taste.
“Simplification” always means removing stuff, right? Usually, but not always, sometimes it means: adding, switching, modifying, adapting, accommodating, changing, rethinking, reclassifying, redistributing…a whole lot of re-ing.
2. Next, I hit a wall of pain and guilt.
Yup, those flying “Whys” hit like me like a sock full of pennies. “Why was I so sick?” “Why couldn’t I get better?” “Why me?” “Why?”
3. Anger (Envy?) and Bargaining. “So many people don’t appreciate: their health, their life, the good people and things; why do they have so much of things they don’t appreciate?”
“Whoever may be out, let’s strike a bargain, what do you want to make this better?”
4. Depression/Reflection/Loneliness. “I’m worthless.” “I’m a drain.” “I’m a burden.” Breaks into a chorus of “All by Myself” while fighting her own hand reaching for the cookies.
5. The upward turn. “I can do this.” “I can find even more resources.” “I can find more people who understand.”
“I can help myself.” “I can push even harder.” “I’m pretty amazing.”
6. Reconstruction and working through.When I said it wasn’t all about de-cluttering, it was a big part because…sigh,
I’m a fantastic bargain snifferhunterstalkerpredator shopper.
Brand names for dirt cheap, price/ad matching, coupons/freebies, sales…long story short, had (insert understatement here) more stuff than I realized. More than half of the more is gone now.
Bumped up my phone plan cause counting seconds wasn’t saving my brain and I was missing stuff and things.
Got more medical resources.
Watched stuff that made me smile and think and not think and lot of giggling: “Knives Out”,“Chilling Adventures of Sabrina”, “Fleabag”, “The Walking Dead”, “The Good Place”, “Virgin River”, “Lost”, “Grace and Frankie” (want to know if a veteran actor/actress is alive, watch this), “The Orville”, “Jack Ryan”, “SNL”, “Joker”, “Lost In Space”, “Spiderman: Far From Home”, “Marriage Story”, “Glitch”, “The Expanse”, and thank you kindly to Netflix for Season 2 of “You”…You know I like to watch.
Unplugged from social media more; it’s a learning curve of an addiction.
7. Acceptance and hope. Now more organized, but with the understanding things pop up to: disrupt, disturb and displace the calm and toss things into the chaos realm.
Hopefully the extra measures I have taken with my “aggressive simplification” will be enough to keep the monsters of chaos at bay.
There’s no linear path to anywhere or anything, it’s all wibbly wobbly, up and down, round and round.
Most living things grieve, in different ways. We grieve those we’ve loved and lost, friendships, connections, community, hope, opportunities, time, health, jobs, dreams…
I predict complications and chaos will continue, but instead of thinking (or overthinking it, thank goodness I never ever ever ever, did I mention ever, do that!) of it all as a catastrophe, think of it as a chance to learn.
And the classic, “But you don’t look sick”. Feel free to add more. I think I’ve heard them all…but you never know.
Yup, I got 99 Problems and Fibromyalgia (Fibromialgia) is all of them…or at least it makes any problem much much much much worse.
I won’t bore you with all the symptoms:
Extreme, endless fatigue (I’ve never heard, “everyone gets tired”…sigh).
Extreme, endless all-over-body-pain 24/7/365 (“everyone has pain, especially as they get older” – how do you presume to know my pain or anyone else’s pain but yours?).
IBS (Oh joy, love nothing more than talking about my bowels to: doctors, family, friends, strangers, interns, readers…”What did you want to be when you grow up?” “Constipated.”).
Depression (tough not to be depressed by all this).
Sleep issues (screw off Alpha waves, no one wants you here).
Mood disorders (maybe my many, many moods are just as ordered as they should be).
Restless leg syndrome.
Anxiety (pick a kind, any kind).
Tender points (misnomer, not tender, excruciating, but trigger points make sense).
Fibrofog (what was I saying?).
Memory and learning problems, like, aah, like, well, there’s Fibrofog (what was I saying?).
Scattered thoughts (dust in the wind, all my thoughts are dust in the wind).
Tingling (not the good kind).
Shakiness (not the good kind).
TMJ (Temporomandibular Joint Syndrome).
Painful and frequent urination.
You may notice a pattern here, #Pain!
Sharp pain, stabbing pain, dull aching pain, burning pain, throbbing pain (Beavis and Butthead laugh for 5 minutes now about “throbbing”).
Extreme sensitivity to: light, noise, sounds, smells, temperatures, humidity, dryness, changes in the weather (especially extreme heat or cold, fun in Canada, eh).
Also, to tastes, textures (Princess and the Pea was written about someone with Fibromyalia, for sure).
Stiffness (not the fun kind).;
Especially morning stiffness (not the fun kind).
Let’s not forget Allodynia.
Itching (like, bugs-under-your-skin-when-jonesing-kind-of-itching, er, for chocolate, my drug of choice).
Waking up feeling like you’ve been run over by a truck or attacked by a Terminator or zombie (brains?) – We are The Walking Dead.
And don’t even get me started on surviving the Holidaze, er, holidays – Christmas, New Year’s Eve, birthdays, Easter, Thanksgiving, Black Friday (it’s counted as a holiday now, right?), actually I can do CyberMonday, and they’re lined up to take me out for Valentine’s Day…
I could go on and on (really), but you get the point.
What can anyone do to try to help chronic suckage?
Pills/medications (anti this, anti that, pro this, pro that, SSRIs, SNRIs, NSAIDs, PB&J – checking if you were still paying attention, lotions, notions, rubs, gels – not the fun kind – vitamins, supplements, opioids, snake oil, gargoyle oil, and on and on).
Deep breathing (keep breathing).
Tai Chi (saved my life).
Change of diet (I do FODMAP, look it up, you’ll hate it).
Massage (no happy endings).
CBT, CBD, CBC, CBA, COD…
It’s all just fleeting moments of feeling almost human.
And if all wasn’t bad enough, many people assume this invisible disability is and let’s see if I have this right, a conspiracy wherein the medical profession has effectively implemented a fake syndrome just to cater to lazy people (wasn’t that nice of them?). Perfectly reasonable, it’s not as if doctors have anything better to do. Or have reputations and licenses to protect. Or have ethics. What exactly would their motivation be? Why make up an illness, aren’t there already enough? Cancer alone should keep them hopping.
There are many health issues that can not be found through standardized testing, for example: Multiple Sclerosis, ALS, Cerebral Palsy, Parkinson’s, Autism, Lupus, ADD/ADHD, wheat or gluten ‘sensitivity’, acute back pain, as well as many mental health issues. So they don’t suffer, don’t feel – it’s all some magical conspiracy…
People like to mock. I get that. It’s become a past-time, even a job for some people, especially in the internet age. I also get those same people would want/expect doctors and people to believe them if they were ill, even if there was no standardized testing for their illness.
To the best of my knowledge, there’s no standardized testing for ignorance or stupidity yet either, but I’d buy stocks for that booming business.
I didn’t ask to be ill. Given the choice I’d be “normal”. I certainly didn’t ask to be mocked and harassed because I’m ill. Even if it was just ‘in my head’, shouldn’t anyone with a health issue be treated with dignity and respect? Maybe we need a standardized test for intolerance.
So how do I cope with ongoing agonizing pain, debilitating fatigue and all the other heaping piles of steaming sh*t that comes with Fibromyalgia aka chronic suckage? If you’re a reader of my blog you know, I think laughter is the best medicine. Laughing even if it hurts sometimes still makes me feel better. I go to a happy place like Psych or George Carlin, Seinfeld, Friends, The Office and more. Tons of laughter a day doesn’t keep the doctor away, but it gives me some quality of life.
For example, this was one of my Tweets, “When I see a thong in a store all I think is, how would I explain to #EMTs all my multiple injuries were caused by just trying on a thong. Huh. #ThatsHot #thongs“. @yadadarcyyada
I love to share the laughter. If I can make someone smile, laugh, giggle, chortle, spew liquid from their nose, then hey, I feel better. Treatments, medications, family, friends and finding a community that gets you, that understands when you have to cancel plans (again)…
Or you can’t remember, ummm, can’t remember, er, huh…and the only good thing you can say about your day is you’re “above ground”, well, anyway.
The thing is, people are just people – no matter how rich or poor; sick (this is an equal opportunity destroyer) or well; all sizes, shapes and shades; known or unknown – you don’t know what you’re missing if you don’t give people a chance. Some will let you down, disappoint, hurt your brain, your heart, your body, but they’re oddly beneficial, they help us appreciate the good ones even more.
Get out there, in person, online, by phone, text, email, do stuff, I don’t know, play cards, smile, knit, donate (give what you can, including your time and talents), bowl, cuddle, talk, sign, sing, walk, dance,embrace your crapathy https://yadadarcyyada.com/2016/05/25/crapathy/
swim, skate, scuba (gate?), especially smile at children, jog, blog, snog (probably not at the same time unless you’re uber talented), ignore, don’t keep score it’s a bore, read, write, compose, doodle, paint, play, bike, hike, “Like”,bake (me a cake? https://yadadarcyyada.com/2016/09/16/you-had-me-at-cake/),
listen, learn, love, add to the world, be part of the solution, go out with friends, care, share, spend time with family, get to know people, smile some more (and more and more and more)!!!
Consider others, let your mind soar. I can’t say you won’t ever be sorry, some folks are baffling, but on a whole, you’ll be better for it (and they will be too).
Not asking anyone to feel sorry for me (although compassion and empathy are always welcome), just a reminder that everyone has problems, 99 or less, 99 or more, just because we can’t see them doesn’t mean they aren’t there…so don’t be one of those problems.
Sorry I’m not sorry…Not sorry I took a blogging break to question myself. I was seized with a feeling, a feeling that I had nothing else to say…I know that doesn’t stop some folks, but I didn’t want to waste my time or yours, you know, overstay my welcome.Then lately, everything I read or watched seemed to have the theme of atonement, redemption – maybe my brain was begging to reclaim my blog, atone for not believing in myself, redeem my poor little lonely blog sitting here, hoping against hope, to be read, so I thought, what the heck, a few more posts couldn’t hurt (er, famous last words?).
Not sorry a couple of wonderful bloggers/authors, Teagan and John knew just how to lure me back, putting down Reese’s Pieces, or in this case, books/ARCs, to lead me back to blogging (Be Good).
Atonement in Bloom, like the first book in the series (it is a series, please please please say it’s a series),roars and purrs with mystery, magic, hope, and intriguing characters you just need to know more about (unlike some people). This book review would not be complete without advising you of something quite dire indeed – this book should come with a warning label, “Read at your own risk, addictive and time-consuming in the best way possible”. Not sorry I’m not a big fan of flowers, never was, but I do like hedge mazes or a cool Labyrinth (yes, including the awesome movie with David Bowie and the muppets) and this book had enough twists and turns to do any of those, even the Royal ones,proud. This is one of those Indie books, like it’s predecessor, that should be made quickly (but well) into a series of hit movies, starring, just to throw a few names out there: David Tennant, Aden Young, Norman Reedus, Nathan Fillion, Richard Armitage, John Krasinski, Ian Somerhalder, James Spader, Chris Pratt, Benedict Cumberbatch, James Roday…I’ve got a whole list (you know that’s right) and of course be these books should be and remain #1 on every Best Sellers List, magical and otherwise. They are simply the cat’s meow.
John W. Howell is a gentleman in the truest sense of the word, you will never be sorry if you visit his blog and books. https://johnwhowell.com/author/ His latest book, The Contract (Between Heaven and Earth) is co-authored with Gwen M. Plano http://www.gwenplano.com/ (I look forward to reading more of her work as well). It’s a complex story that could be hard-to-follow, perhaps because it’s such a unique fusion of the natural and supernatural, but instead this tactile and celestially charged story has wings that fly in a metaphysical rush through love, hope, honour, action, and mostly, redemption. It was one of those, I’ll-just-read-a-little-more-maybe-a-few-more-pages-just-one-more-chapter-until-I’d-devoured-the-whole-book-and-had-to-write-this-book-review-or-my-version-thereof type things. Heart-thumping, in more ways than one. I can clearly picture The Contract as a movie, or a Netflix series (hint hint Netflix, get this before Hulu, Amazon Prime, Playstation Vue, HBO, or someone else gets it).
Not sorry I’m honest (even in book reviews, though I’ve severely tempered my extreme, sometimes remorseless bluntness over the years, so please, send me your books). Remember when honesty, truth, facts, used to be a good thing? If you think you have a valid point, or story, or belief, or you didn’t break the law, why lie?
Not sorry life isn’t fair (doesn’t mean I won’t complain about it now and again…and again?).
Not overly sorry I didn’t get everything or give everything.
Not much point being sorry I screwed up and will do so again.
Not even slightly sorry I have opinions and can still compartmentalize, be objective and effective…as can many others. #sorrynotsorry
Not particularly sorry I’m dumb about some things and smart about others, addicted to chocolate and gifs and memes and books…also, not sorry I’m not: young, rich, stunningly beautiful, stick insect thin, famous, infamous, or quiet.
Not sorry I ignore the trolls, their utter and intense cruelty, while still feeling slightly nauseated that people are so angry, so hurt, so pathetic that they have to lash out at others to feel better, or maybe just to feel anything?
Not sorry I found the staggeringly absorbing TV series, Rectify Sundance/Netflix starring the remarkable Canadian-Australian actor Aden Young (in looks a cross between Nathan Fillion and Tom Hardy, but quite different from either, and I say that as a fan of all), also, Abigail Spencer, Clayne Crawford, Linds Edwards, J.D. Evermore, J. Smith-Cameron, Nathan Darrow, Caitlin FitzGerald, Adelaide Clemens, Luke Kirby, as well as an impressive amount of Deadwoodand The Walking Dead (idea for a new show, The Walking Deadwood? ) alumni. This is a compelling cautionary tale of how our carelessness with people can start chain reactions of brokenness. That despite unspeakable (but needs to be spoken of, long and loud) cruelty and injustice, you can find hope, kindness, justice, and even, redemption, sometimes in the most unlikely places. If this doesn’t fix in your mind how easily life can come undone and redone, I surely don’t know what would.
Not sorry I believe piracy is not a victimless crime, but shiver me timbers, charge less, yo ho ho and we’d buy more, you scurvy dogs!
Not sorry I don’t know everything. I can’t rectify all mine and the world’s problems. I can’t readily atone for all my alleged “sins”. Partly because I don’t see some of them as sins, my truth isn’t your truth and your truth isn’t my truth. Partly because time takes care of all that – a memory is not a fact. Perhaps I’m reaching an age where I’m unapologetic, but that’s a story for another day.
Something has changed
not the same.
I’m tired of playing,
someone else’s game.
Too late for second-guessing. Too late to press stop (oops, I hit Publish!). Time to trust my instincts, close my eyes and leap!
Some things I cannot change, but till I try, I’ll never know!
I’m sick of denying gravity, now…I’m defying gravity!
Even by getting up in the morning…I’m defying gravity!Yo, I’ll tell you what I want, what I really really want. I wanna—, I wanna—, I wanna stop hearing ‘want’ instead of ‘need’…So I have a problem, something I have to face…To move ahead at a more novel pace.We need to not believe everything we read and not only read everything we believe. My fondness wish? That we hit pause, stop fighting about who’s right and who’s wrong. Simple, the facts are right; what if we’re all wrong?I want to read what I want…Not what’s fed to me by algorithms to feed greed, telling me what to read what to believe…What’s the worst that can happen? I go to Over-Readers Anonymous meetings (Are those a thing?). I can find books for myself everywhere…Mysterious buildings with ‘Library’ on the door. Bookstores, smartphones, laptops, tablets, family, friends, book sales…I’ll answer the siren call – pages whispering dreams, promising more and more.
I could say ‘no’, follow steps…Or stand up proud and say, “I’m a bookaholic, but baby, I wouldn’t have it any…other…way!!!” So I’m defying gravity! Carrying books, swaying, falling, spilling dreams…Onto me!Don’t try to pull me down; come with me instead. Think of what we could do, together…Just by saying yes! (You better believe I’m twirling…right now!).
Yup, books are wicked. So is TV. Definitely Social Media – Twitter, Facebook, Pinterest, Instagram, etc. Fashion. Movies. Food. Video games. Blogging.Holidays (isn’t it Thanksgiving, oops everyday, then how about Halloween then?). Seductively luring us from reality, or are they reality? Whatever, to thine own self be true (note Shakespeare didn’t say to thine own selfish be true).
I’ve been trying slow blogging, er, being semi-unplugged? Whatever you want to call it. I enjoyed the time off, but glad to be back to blogging https://yadadarcyyada.com/2017/02/02/theres-no-crying-in-blogging/ So, I know what I did this summer. I laughed, I cried. Got tired and inspired. Wondered and wired…all while we were on a break!
I got cozy with a bunch of women who find murder victims then conveniently pin the mysterious crimes on others. Thank you Julia Buckley (My latest booky joy, but hey, I’ve exhausted the library’s supply of your books, hate to be presumptuous, I’m hungry for you to write more http://www.juliabuckley.com/blog), Laura Levine, Ellery Adams, Leslie Budewitz, Kym Roberts, Edith Maxwell, Lee Hollis, E.J. Copperman, and more! The worst killer ever? Doubt.
What else? Cooking, games, philosophy, writing, yardsaling, Goodwill (bargain) hunting, weight loss, ghosts, organizing – even a guy claiming he’s so organized, he could move out in 20 minutes, hey buddy, slow down, are The Sopranos after you, I’ve had longer bowel movements (oops, TMI?).
I was once again reminded that life isn’t just unfair, it can be downright sadistic, so, as we weather the storms of life, change buffeting and sometimes battering us, try to remember, people are people, not toys to be played with, in person or online – if you wouldn’t like it done to you, don’t do it to anyone else.
I boldly went where no Blob has gone before, on The Orville, in a ‘Discovery’ of just how much Fox will pay to let Seth MacFarlane make love onscreen to Star Trek and all other things sci-fi and fantasy (I’m looking at Star Trek mini-ships and ET in my work area, I get it). I only watch each episode two or five times because they’re hilarious and thought-provoking, not because I have a tiny (huge) crush on Ed Mercer and Justin.
I remembered I’m a 100% unique…just like everyone else. It’s my own personal This Is Us, minus Justin Hartley (I miss Smallville, Passions, and Revenge) and Milo Ventimiglia (I miss Gilmore Girls and Heroes), sigh, shake it off, it’s 2017…
I was prodded into remembering the world’s two most important words (sigh): fine print. What you don’t know is more important than what you know or think you know…
I wondered how Moonstruck could be 30 years old, I just watched it yesterday. Cher and Nicholas Cage are still bizarrely mesmerizing and I want baked goods…and opera (I don’t suppose Hamilton and Wicked count?).
I was most definitely distracted by bloggers…and bloggers who wrote books. For example, Teagan (https://teagansbooks.com) was kind enough, even though she was going through a rough time to consistently give us the gift of her posts and another stimulating escapade ebook, Murder at the Bijou: Three Ingredients I (adventure awaits, flying by the seat of your pants!).
At times, I found myself so excited I couldn’t eat. Who am I kidding, chocolate and I started the summer in a serious relationship and I’m happy to announce, we’re getting engaged (oops, I ate the ring). Isn’t it weird when some people say stuff like, I was so excited or so busy I forgot to eat. What?!? There’s a way to forget to eat? Tell me! Now! Frankly, I’m too busy #Sheetcaking (Tina Fey dropped by SNL to demonstrate our technique; I think it has all the hallmarks of an Olympic sport – talk about defying gravity!).
Nostaligia was always big and getting bigger as we struggle to return to simpler times, times when TV shows were discussed around the ‘watercooler’, when Sunday, Monday were Happy Days, when Tuesday, Wednesday were Happy Days, Thursday, Friday, well, you get the point. Times when all promises weren’t false, when lies weren’t the norm, where words and actions meant something…Where we didn’t forget the unforgettable.
I think we’ll see even more of a rush of gentler shows and revival ‘nostaligaporn’ shows like Will & Grace – glad you’re back, guess you were on a break too – I missed your silliness; shows people can talk about without fist fights ensuing. We need more things that bring us together instead of tearing us apart. Look at our skeletons (not the closet ones) – we’re all the same, deep down.
So no one told me it was gonna be this way (blogging and life). Jobs are all a joke (and a 4-letter word). Of course I’m broke, apparently my Donate button is mostly merely decorative…no eccentric billionaires want to adopt me and help save the endangered broke and obscure bloggers who once roamed the internet free…
My love life is not DOA, it’s just resting, pinin’ for the fjords…I’ll have you know my love life is not bereft of life, pushing up the daisies, or resting in peace! It hasn’t shuffled off its mortal coil, run down the curtain, or joined the bleedin’ choir invisible! It’s not a ex-love life!
Looks like I’m always stuck in Park (or Neutral?). Because it hasn’t been my day, My week, my month, but it has been a lark! (Thanks to my old ‘friends’, we got together this Summer and Fall for coffee at Central Perk, thought my wrists are a bit sore from holding those huge cups and my ears ringing from the creepy laugh track). My time off has taught me, I’ll be there for you…I hope you’re there for me too!
Once upon a time, a woman began a blog; she had no idea what she was doing, but that had never stopped her before. Almost four years passed and she found blogging was just like life, only with fewer calories and even more emails.
1. Life and blogging are about choices. Good? Bad? Who knows, until you make them.
3. The truth is always out there, whether it comes out or not, you’ll always know it can come out.
4. If you’re going to worry, make it worthwhile. On your deathbed I doubt you’ll be stressing out about if your toes look good in sandals, if you have the biggest house, fanciest car, most jewelry, and who you knew… https://yadadarcyyada.com/2016/05/25/crapathy/
5. You’re not the only one. Find someone who also thinks they’re the only one – you might help each other.
6. Having a love affair with cake and cookies can be epic, like, movie epic. Then again, Titanic and Romeo and Juliet…Balance in all things.
7. Laundry is evil and like all evil it grows if you ignore it…even to blog.
8. Be selective how you’re giving your time, it’s the one thing you’ll never get back.
9. Let your imagination run away with you sometimes.
10. Be a superhero. You don’t need fancy gadgets like Batman, alien powers like Superman, Amazon (ish?) powers like Wonder Woman. No cool suits like Iron Man, Deadpool, or Spiderman…Nope. You just need to care. Be a friend. Be there. Help someone. In the blogworld, ‘Like’ their post. Share their post. Blogging is strange when you’re a stranger…get out there and show some #bloglove Saw Guardians of the Galaxy Vol 2 (awesome, but I wasn’t as hooked on the soundtrack as the first one…I am Groot) – it made me want to run out and help the world. Had to rewatch Guardians of the Galaxyhttps://yadadarcyyada.com/2015/04/10/im-hooked-on-a-feeling/ because, hey, Chris Pratt.
11. There’s enough hard stuff in the world and the blogworld, don’t add to it.
12. The worst crime that I ever did, besides listening to rock’n’roll (paraphrasing The Stranglers, with a giggle), was telling myself I wasn’t good enough; if I didn’t believe it, why the Hell else would anyone else?
13. People always say “quit whining”…why? Sometimes, in the midst of a good whine sometimes comes a flash of insight, a bolt of wisdom, a bombshell of brilliant. Again, moderation.
15. Life goes around and around. Watching Twin Peaks: The Return – just as weird, but sadly, less playful https://yadadarcyyada.com/2015/08/02/never-tear-us-apart/ – I’m reminded, you always look back through different eyes. My blog has something to tell you – when you get there, you’ll already be there.
16. You can lead a good life without TV, you can also lead a good life with TV – life doesn’t have to be back and white (TV taught me that).
17. Despite what you may have heard, ‘Grease’ is not the word, but neither are: ‘low-rise’, ‘low-carb’, ‘SEO’, ‘dirt jeans’, ‘alternative facts’, ‘influencer’…
The sun set; dusk fell on the shelf, and lights began to appear along the stove. That which blends, so held, in hand or all alone, such power, to mix, to mash, to merge, to fuse, once individual, now as one, together. The upper reaches, the place of monstrous leftovers, marked ominously with a date, huddle in the brooding gloom of fridge light, mocked by the enticing garish glare of magnet cradled take-out flyers.
“And this,” she noted suddenly, “has to be one of the dark places of the earth.”
In the static of their surroundings, the slightly scornful pots, pans, knives and other pointy things lurked, growled their promise, ready to play the food game.
She doggedly tried to follow the medically suggested diet; the worst that could be said of her was she wanted to believe.
Food is not for the faint of heart, it beckons, it bubbles, it boils, it brews, it even burns...Food, as perplexing as the definition of fake news. My food feelings? Let’s just say, my kitchen and me, we’re officially changing our relationship status to, “It’s complicated”.
Let’s Play – 7 Ways To Survive Your Kitchen!!!
1. Have your recipes, like blog posts and/or synopsis ready – in your head, online, or written down. Have all your ingredients out first, nothing worse than being halfway through and notice you’re not rising to the occasion.
2.Cooking is time-consuming, like blogging, like writing, like life itself, but if you clean up as you go, it’s easier. Try baking soda and vinegar – ecofriendly, frugal, and together they’re an explosive combination, seriously you can make a volcano while cleaning. Don’t forget to snap on your rubber gloves and clean that dirty, dirty oven. Maybe you’ll have naughty dreams about kitchens – hot, steamy dreams about someone else cooking/cleaning for you, oh yeees!!!
3.Tempted by takeaway/takeout, fast food, even processed foods? Remind yourself it’s bad for your waist and wallet. Same goes for blogging, fast and processed, you can get that anywhere, isn’t it better to go for the real thing.
4. Easter is an egg-cellent time to dye eggs, naturally, with family, friends (even imaginary ones), and furfriends. Then you can still eat them, the eggs, not family, friends, or furfriends. Is your egg a good egg? Fill a bowl with water. Gently place “suspicious” egg in the bowl. Does the egg stay on the bottom sideways – a good egg! Does it stand up, but lean drunkenly to the side – still good, but better really a pickled egg. Stands straight up, still ok, but use, like right now. Floating? A bad egg (cue the Veruca Salt song from Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory). I am the maker of merriment, the dreamer of dreams (in case you were away https://yadadarcyyada.com/2017/03/09/heres-to-the-ones-who-dream/).
5.Beware The Pointies! It seems like kitchen gadgets, utensils, tools, gizmos, appliances, etc. are designed to somehow maim, mangle, or even murder those innocently trying to cook.
Kitchens are deathtraps. Be safe.
6.Lettuce us celebrate cooking! Like blogging, writing, social media, friendships, relationships, work, and life in general, it can be a time-eater. Orange you glad we didn’t make a big dill about this game? Romaine calm, even if you feel like you’re playing ketchup with all the relish you can mustard. Just beet it and spaghetti out of here.
7.Life is like a paper bag…You just never know when you need to cover, conceal, meltdown, carry, ripen (seriously easy way to ripen your avocados, bananas, apples, tomatoes, etc.), and you really never know when you’re going to need a puppet. Be ready.
Oh life, it’s bigger It’s bigger than you (doesn’t feel like it on a bloat day) And you are not me (not even on a bloat day) The lengths that I will go to, the chocolate that adds to my thighs Oh no, I’ve ate too much I didn’t eat enough?
That’s me in the corner That’s me in the spotlight Losing my willpower…. I thought that I heard you baking I thought that I heard you grill I think I thought I saw you fry
Consider this Consider this, a hint of cake and cookies Consider this, the stroganoff That brought me to my knees That was just a dream Try, cry, why try That was just a dream Just a food dream Just a food dream
Well, dear readers, do you want to keep playing? Awesome, then tell me your: food battles, food love affairs, diets, tips, advice, recipes.
I’d like to thank those who inspired the game: food, Joseph Conrad, Martin Sheen, R.E.M., Liam Neeson – I don’t know who you are. I don’t know what you want. If you are looking for onions or garlic, I can’t have them. But I do have are a very peculiar set of skills, skills I have acquired over years of cooking…
1. Support. From family, friends, groups, or bras – support is important. Why? We all have saggy moments, even the world. I admit to feeling shaken and stirred – maybe it’s just too much time in the shallow end, I feel surrounded by ‘s’ words…
2. Salt. People have been using it for like 10,000 years, slightly longer than I’ve been alive. As a baby I had a saltlick in my crib. I wander the streets following salt trucks. I envy cats, dogs, and giraffes – they can freely lick humans for salt. I know it’s bad for me…my precious. I’m slowly desalting.
3. Selling. Everything seems to be for and/or on sale now. The new genius? Stephen Hawking selling cars.
4.Batman v Superman: Dawn of Justice. One word review: Why? Just move on – Wonder Woman, Aquaman…just move on.
5.Snoop Dogg and Martha Stewart. I have so many questions about their Potluck Dinner Parties. Who’s their demographic? Who’s made most uncomfortable watching this?
18.A Series of Unfortunate Events. First, staggeringly stunning books by Lemony Snicket (sounds like a real name)…Then a cool movie – I bet Meryl Streep can think of way more unfortunate events nowadays…Presently, a quirky, impertinent series starring Neil Patrick Harris and Patrick Warburton. I’m so desperately happy it’s so desperately sad?
Easter is here again. It means different things to different people. For some, it’s religious. For some, family, and/or the Easter bunny or all. But like so many things, it revolves around food, and plenty of it – ham, fish, roast beef, yams, hot-cross buns, cakes and cupcakes decorated like bunnies, jellybeans, Cadbury creme eggs, marshmallows peeps, chocolate bunnies, rice krispies treats shaped like bunnies and eggs, bunny bread…
I’ve been binging, this time reading, including, the Popular Culture and Philosophy series from Open Court. Pop culture and philosophy, for me, that’s book heroin. I started with Homeland and Philosophy: For Your MindsOnly, edited by Robert Arp. On some level I like this show, https://yadadarcyyada.com/2014/04/03/homeland/ I keep watching it; one thing about it really stuck with me, Brody (Damian Lewis) is compared to a cockroach, surviving no matter what, but bringing misery to others. It describes so many people, oh my, does it describe the whole human race, crawling across the planet’s face?
My next bite was The Ultimate Walking Dead and Philosophy: Hungry For More, edited by Wayne Yuen. I nibbled on each page, snacking on deep thoughts about a deep show; delicious, but a lot to digest (chocolate-covered Daryl Dixon?).
Then I finally gave in, read some of Sheryl Sandberg (COO of Facebook) and her Lean In self-help stuff. Same old, same old, but still good advice and catchy. It’s certainly what we want to hear, that we can succeed by embracing challenge and risk, but is it realistic? We want to believe women are moving ahead, but are they?
We also want to think diets, shifting our body weight to the thinner side will make us happy. It’s important to keep in mind, at all times, correlation is not causation, even strong correlation. I watched the documentary, Fed Up, like Ms. Sandberg’s work, it’s catchy, but with gaping holes and I don’t just mean the to-be-counted-as-sexy-these-days-thigh-gap which I think used to be called bow-legged and wasn’t that medically uncool? I guess having your thighs catch on fire while wearing corduroy isn’t considered ‘sexy’ anymore.
We already know the truth, we don’t need all these books, documentaries, etc. We don’t need a magic pill, that won’t fill our emptiness. We need moderation, in all things. And to stop worrying about what everyone else thinks. I’ve had a long, complicated relationship with food, now I just want to be friends.
I wonder if our aversion to moderation comes from childhoods dominated by promises of dire consequences intermingled with lies. You know: – Don’t swallow your gum, it’ll stay in your stomach for 7 years. – Don’t pee in the pool – a dye will show you did it. – Cracking your knuckles will give you arthritis. Toads will give you warts.
– Don’t go swimming for 30 minutes after you eat. – I’m leaving without you. We’re almost there. – It won’t hurt. We’ll see. I don’t know.
– Maybe later. I always know when you’re lying. – Your pet (insert fav pet name here) went to live on a farm. – Coffee will stunt your growth. Milk will make you grow.
– Just a minute. Give me a minute (a parent minute is a lot longer than the average minute). – And the obsession with preserving your eyesight. Carrots improve your eyesight. Reading in the dark damages your eyesight. If you cross your eyes they’ll stay that way. If you sit too close to the TV it will ruin your eyes. I wonder what we’re supposed to think Google glasses, smartphones, laptops, computers, etc. will do to our eyesight?
What about you, dear readers, any gems from childhood? I still feel guilty about stepping on cracks as a child. Sorry Mom. Walking in the rain, dodging worms, I tried to remember did we ever get told, Step on a worm, make your Mother squirm?
I wish you all a wonder-filled Easter. No matter how you celebrate, whether you lean in, lean out, lean up, or just enjoy, I hope you have enough.
Well I’m a-runnin’
(ok, walking quickly)
down the road,
tryin’ to loosen
I’ve got seven
on my mind
Four million that want to own me, two that want to stone me, one that could be a friend of mine.
Take it easy, take it easy.
Don’t let the sound of your own words drive you crazy. Lighten up while you still can. Don’t even try to understand. Just find a place to make your stand, and take it easy…
Whether in blogging, work, love, parenting, friendship…The Eagles (goodbye Glenn Fry) had it right – take it easy. The sound of your own wheels (the ones turning in your brain) aka the sound of your own words – spoken, written, or even in your head can drive you crazy. Instead, I want to Take It Easy, to celebrate – despite the war and strife, the Canadian dollar sinking faster than the Titanic (the ship, not the movie)…
rising food prices (wait, how many were going to eat cauliflower in January anyway? Eat in season, or frozen), Star Wars mania, lack of affordable housing and healthcare, loss, illness…but at least there’s no zombies, and I still have all of you – my readers and other bloggers!
You make me happy when skies are grey, you’ll never know, dears, how much I love you – thank you, thank you, thank you for being here!
Friday January 29th we’re going to beat the January blahs, the winter ennui, the snow woes with a knockout blog party!
I was trying to get it together for this week, but seriously, The X-Files is returning, my hold of Season 3 of Orphan Black came in at the library, my son has a Pokemon thingie, schoolwork, housework, workwork, lifework, adulting, decisions, snow, cold, snow, cold (repeat)…I think I’m catching a cold, oh, and did I mention The X-Files is returning?
And some of you may have noticed I’ve been trying out new themes. Turns out choices are limited for mobile-friendly themes in the ‘Free’ category on WordPress, but I will choose in time to expose it (oh my!) for the celebration!!!
Come back Friday January 29th and join in the fun! It’s easy, leave your blog link or a link to an old post, new post, red post, blue post in the comment box (one link per comment, but come back as often as you like). Introduce yourself, wander around, eat some cake, be astonished at the size of my archives (oh my!), and mingle with the other bloggers. There will be virtual cake, blogging advice, and who knows what else! It may take awhile, but I promise I’ll read, visit, and reply to everyone!
One thing I’ve yet to regret (but the day is young) is blogging. I’ve virtually met some words-cannot-express-how-awesome people here who’ve welcomed me with open arms into their blogging family.
And I get swag! Really, my mail carrier randomly hands me treats! Like books (my drug of choice), or chocolates from Chicago I won from the enchanting Cherhttps://thechicagofiles.wordpress.com/ a delightful friend, blogger, and ex-pat Canadian. Yes, I got a box of chocolates delivered to my door just for reading a blog post! I love blogging! Those poor chocolates didn’t make it through the night – next of kin was notified…then eaten.
It may seem like the internet is a giant virtual haystack and we’re just tiny needles, but we can find each other with blogging parties and thanks to the tireless efforts of amazing and generous bloggers like:
Twas the week before Christmas
(almost two till my birthday)…
When all through the blogosphere…
not a blogger was stirring…
ok, some are stirring, but mostly cocktails…
Yet posts were still flying out with hopes that readers might give them a shout!
Christmas isn’t the most wonderful time of the year for bloggers, readers and many bloggers are off prepping for the big day, partying, waiting in line for Star Wars: The Force Awakens, and of course, searching for perfect gifts.
Here are some, er, helpful last-minute gift ideas for those hard to buy for folks:
1. O Christmas tree! As a cautionary note, unlike in the movies, apparently it’s ‘frowned upon’, some might even say illegal, to just randomly cut trees down. Who knew?
2. Draw happy faces on all their socks/nylons so they’ll feel happy as they start each day. Or sneak into their house or room and draw a happy face on their wall, or mirror in red lipstick or paint. Wait, is that creepy? Nah, it’ll be a fun surprise.
3. Fix something for them: TV, car, fridge, cellphone, alarm system, computer, appliances, sewing machine, etc. Even if none were broken (but might be after), it’s the thought that counts.
4. Donate to a cause in their name or better yet, start a foundation in their name, I’m sure it won’t affect their taxes…much.
5. Sing them a song, but only if your voice doesn’t resemble fingernails on a chalkboard, mastodons dying in a tar pit, Bridget Jones singing, or my Mom singing (love you, please don’t sing).
6. Indie books. Mass-produced can be good, but a steady diet can leave you feeling flat. Best thing about indie, less cookie cutter, same goes for everything. Like indie author/blogger, A.H. Browne who kindly beamed aliens into my email. As they scurried around my brain, I was laughingly sucked into space to cavort (hey, I can cavort with the best of them) through the Saloon at the Edge of Everywhere. That sounds familiar, did I spend time there in my youth, next to CBGB, right? Book One of The Otherwhere Chronicles made me reluctant to return to Earth, like when you’re at a party, it’s past time to go home, but you think, just a few minutes more. If you’re feeling brave and in need of some fun, visit Arthur at http://pouringmyartout.com/ – don’t say I didn’t warn you! Any indie authors reading this, please add links in the comment box below where your work can be found (heck, it’s Christmas, anyone add links).
Adding blogging to that and anxiety, well, it could be the proverbial straw.
When it’s quiet here on my blog, I have time to think.
Why am I really doing this?
Should I be doing this?
I have so much else to do, is this a distraction?
Or is blogging just another version of chocolate, sappy movies, wanting to cry, desperately wishing a time machine would materialize in my living room to whisk me back to a time when the biggest decisions I had to make were: what to wear to school, who to hang out with, what to listen to…Probably shouldn’t go back, I might scream at myself to quit wishing to grow up and just enjoy growing up.
Some days I feel like blogging is more Hotline Blog (I’m assured Drake will drop this as a follow-up to his famous Hotline Bling) You used to like me on my blog post Late or early when I needed blog love And I know when that hotline pinged It could only mean one thing… But these days, you’ve become a ghost Wonder if you’re out there forgettin’ about my blog post Doing other things, maybe making cinnamon toast
But blogging isn’t all about Likes, it’s about enjoying each other…
I try to imagine what my blog would have been if I blogged as a child, you know, before I knew:
1. I’d have a computer, in my home.
2. I’d use this computer to tell perfect strangers (well, maybe not perfect) stuff about my life.
3. My worst recurring nightmare wasn’t fear, it was the fear of fear.
4. Bacon would become both hero and villain.
5. Everyone lied to me about stuff, including but not limited to: Santa, this won’t hurt (it did), The Tooth Fairy, being “almost there” (we weren’t), there was no more chocolate (there was), and that I’d use math in real life…
6. Life is less Game of Life and more Monopoly.
7. Power is a commodity, not necessarily the one that lights up your home.
8. What skin tags are, let alone having them.
9. The world is crawling with serial killers, if TV is to be believed.
10. Some people will still be mean, even as adults.
11. I’d use numbers from a fortune cookie for lottery tickets.
12. My body would be my worst enemy.
13. I’d look more like Jessica Fletcher than Jessica Alba.
14. I’d still be watching Doctor Who, Monty Python, and so would my teen son.
15. I’d lose hours of my life to a mysterious world that delivers weird yet amusing things to me right at home (yes, including pizza and Amazon).
16. I’d ever tire of Christmas (well, the commercialism of Christmas).
17. I’d try figgy pudding…get out there – try, visit, read, comment, share, take part in something different.
18. I’d let zombies into my home at least once a week…and love it.
19. You can’t eat all the cake, you have to share it, same goes for blogging.
20. I’d have many families – the one I was born into, the ones I found and found me, the ones I’ve made, and this amazing blogging community.
So get out there, hakuna matata – visit some blogs, enjoy each other, and never forget, you’re not alone.
I was working
on my blog,
late one night
When my eyes
an eerie sight
For my post
from its slab,
began to rise
to my surprise
It did the mash,
it did the Monster Meet and Greet Mash!
A monster blogger mash, it was a graveyard smash!
It did the mash, it caught on in a flash…
It did the mash, it did the monster blog mash!
The zombies and bloggers were having fun,
The blog party had just begun…
The scene was rockin’, we were digging the shares,
Some were commenting, well, those who dared
So add your link and des-crypt-ion, girls and guys,
Then suddenly to your surprise…
You can mash, you can monster blogger mash!
While I often say the best part of blogging is ‘meeting’ other bloggers, readers, etc., it’s been too long since we hung together, so welcome to the party, please, feel free to leave your blog name, a link to your blog or favourite post(s), and a des-crypt-ion. And pass it on: Twitter, Facebook, Pinterest, Reddit, Tumblr, Google+, LinkIn,or reblog, so others can dig it too…
For some special treats, drop by some of the other blogs and Suzie’s Blog Party on Halloweenhttp://suzie81speaks.com (fabulous British blogger and creator of Twitter’s popular #SundayBlogShare). I’ll check back, enjoy the snacks, but I have some busy times ahead, including preparing something completely different…Hopefully I haven’t bitten off more than I can chew-ie and end up as blaster fodder. May The Force be with me.
Yes, It’s the Most Wonderful Time of the Year People dressing as ghosts, goblins, and ghouls, Celebrities, minions, villains, and fools Filled with fun, food, and fear It’s the most wonderful time of the year
It’s the hap-happiest season of all With trick or treat greetings and candy meetings Friends and strangers coming to call It’s the hap-happiest season of all
All that peace and love stuff, it’s just idealistic mumbo jumbo, right?
Or is it?
While I admit I don’t understand a lot of stuff, but as long as it’s not really hurting anyone, why would I care?
Too often, the commonly held view seems to be that if we don’t agree, we’re at odds.
Like somehow 7 billion of us are suddenly going to start agreeing, or we have to battle it out Star Trek style.
For example, I find the rise of pumpkin spice alarming – apparently pumpkin spice is a season now, so the pumpkin spice must flow.
Here’s a completely incomplete list of stuff people do that I don’t ‘get’, or want to (no particular order):
1. Touching wet paint or wet cement – yes, it’s wet, move on. 2. Running water after going to the bathroom instead of actually washing your hands. 3. Lying, lying, and what was that other thing, oh yeah, lying. 4. Judging a person based on their skin tone, religion, race, nationality, whom they choose to love, clothes, home, family, etc.
5. Walking into traffic looking at a cellphone. 6. Bad driving. 7. Hurting others, especially children. 8. Loving something just because it’s endorsed by or has the name of a celebrity.
9. Using racism as a political strategy. 10. Fat shaming, and also those who say fat shaming is wrong, because they’re also calling people fat. 11. Having fictional conversations in your head with others (ok, done this). 12. Not smiling back at a child or being impatient when an elderly person is slowly walking down the stairs in front of you.
13. Yelling at furniture that jumped out and stubbed your toe (ok, I’ve totally done that). 14. Wearing uncomfortable shoes (especially with stubbed toes). 15. People who pretend they don’t fart (you do, we all do, own it). 16. Reading the instructions after you’ve done something.
17. Saying “I’m sorry” when you’re not sorry. 18. Unenvironmentalists (you know that should be a word). 19. Buying non-orange pumpkins. 20. Pretending you don’t wish some cool movie-like thing would happen to you today instead of just the usual stuff…come on, you really haven’t done this?
I can’t understand how people find the time or energy to judge, fight, or generally care so much about everyone else’s business. Does this have to do with our fight or flight response? Not running from sabre-tooth tigers (mostly), our fear response is now triggered by shopping (prices are terrifying), finding info on the internet (bloodcurdling), and politicians (I’ll take the tiger). Obviously our fear of scarcity has survived, so maybe those who are different or disagree feed into that fear. I’m just guessing, frankly, I’m baffled.
The internet just seethes with fear and loathing which is why I’m happy when I find bloggers who make me smile. David Prosser, a wonderful, funny, and caring blogger from Wales offered the world his Buthidars philosophy https://lorddavidprosser1.wordpress.com/ – a hug, a good deed, a simple gesture, a smile…forging a path toward peace.
And he shares his life each week at: https://barsetshirediaries.wordpress.com/ and kindly shared one of his novels, The Queen’s Envoy, with the caveat, it wasn’t everyone’s cup of tea. Perhaps, but I emphatically enjoyed the fanciful flight of fictitious foibles. It reminded me of watching Bond movies with my Dad. As a child I didn’t understand what Pussy Galore, Holly Goodhead, and “Oh James!”really meant, but the spirit of adventure always made me feel like anything was possible. I like that feeling, wherever I can find it.
It’s Thanksgiving this weekend in Canada;I’m thankful we can all agree to disagree, eh. I don’t tell people they’re stupid for their beliefs and I don’t expect them to understand my complicated relationships with: chocolate, spiders, TV, sleep, housekeeping, kale, Jane Austen, gravity, technology, toenail clippers, Christmas, pools (you know, cause of sharks), clowns, Thanksgiving, meat, and life in general.
We don’t have to agree to have fun, be respectful, and add love and hope to the world.
You’re the one thing I just can’t get enough of.
I’ll tell you something, it could be blog love.
Because I’ve had the time of my life
and I’ve rarely felt this way before,
I swear, it’s the truth and I owe it all to you…
Always liked Dirty Dancing’s message that nothing is impossible (well, except a sequel with Patrick Swayze…or Jennifer Grey’s original nose). And that nobody should put me in a corner, unless I paint myself in (true story).
Which lead me to Laggies, ok Sam Rockwell lead me there, but intrigued and entertained, I stayed. Kiera Knightley plays a quirky woman (no surprise, but this time, no British accent, way to step out there) who too often waits for others to make decisions for her. Instead of living life according to someone else’s schedule, beliefs, and dreams she decides to follow her heart, her dreams, and finds a her version of happiness.
1. Company from out-of-town, got them hooked on Haven, muhahaha…also, food involved.
2. Realized people would be 500lbs if they ate as much food as the characters in Joanne Fluke books.
3. Read a great book on memory…can’t remember the title.
4. Re-pledged undying allegiance to public libraries.
5.Thought about taking up knitting….hmm, instead read a book about women in a knitting club, close enough.
6. Read Beekeeping for Dummies…I have more chance of being a bee than a beekeeper apparently.
7. Tried not to second guess myself, wait, unless that’s a bad idea.
1. Had a zen moment where I just felt floaty – good job remembering not to do this while driving or operating heavy machinery.
2. Donated more stuff.
3. Dental emergency – I know I’ve always tried to be good to you, teeth, but I’ll redouble my efforts.
4. Pain from dental work, watched The Originals and thought, do vampires need dental work?
5. Some pain, not as much as Orphan Black (wow, Tatiana Maslany playing endless clones just never gets boring), had me revisiting The Island of Dr. Moreau, did I almost forgot how epic H.G. Wells was?
6. Went to mall and yard sales, not sure which were more surreal, people buying junk or selling it.
7. Watched Fear The Walking Dead, really, like anyone would notice the zombie apocalypse that quickly these days, especially in LA.
1. Haters gonna hate, but they’re just noise, listened to the good stuff instead.
2. Lost more of my baby weight, sure, my baby’s 17, but better late than never, right?
3. Computer’s dying; it has Windows Vista if that gives you any idea of it’s age. Looked for new one.
4. Worried excessively about passing driving test until I noticed I had chocolate…feeling fine.
5. Passed my last driving test, yup, you can teach an old dog new tricks. They’re dreadfully obsessed with parallel parking, so this is about parallel posting, aka, please leave your link here (in the comment section – any post) for others to find to celebrate with me.
6. Saw a music video that made me wonder if I’d been dancing incorrectly for years as my underwear doesn’t show.
7. Master of Horror Wes Craven, died. I always wondered, could some of my insomnia stem from watching Nightmare of Elm Street?
1. Spent time chatting online with Microsoft; quickly realized I knew more than they did.
2. Reminded again how wonderful and brave my son is.
3. Sang Nothing Compares 2 U, out loud, thinking of my blogging friends.
4. Oh, so that’s what it sounds like when the doves cry.
5. Thought about what I’m going to do next, writing wise.
6. Made a bouquet of pencils.
7. Wrote more emails to politicians and news people.
Remember, it’s just an illusion the world is racing past, go at the speed that makes you happy. Have the time of your life.
To me, blogging is
a version of the
in a bottle.
The blogging world
is a vast ocean,
we throw our
message out there
and hope against hope
someone finds it.
Some of us are trying to
connect, share, find others,
teach, or maybe even
send out an SOS.
So how do you start
your own ‘message in a bottle’
and make it reach others?
1. Don’t think about if your readers will love what you write or you’re going to be discovered, just make sure you love it, then hopefully, they will. If not, there’s always chocolate.
2. Remember as you send these bottles out, those you’re trying to reach are never far from the madding crowd (hearing people mispronounce the title, Far From the Madding Crowd is actually more fun than the book/movies, is that wrong?). People are busy, so when they open their email to see a hundred billion bottles washed up on their shore, it can be overwhelming.
3. In this same vein, posts can be vampires, sucking away time. Or maybe sometimes a vampire is just a vampire.
4. Posts can also be zombies, shuffling into our readers or mailboxes, taking bites out of the day. I don’t know if I Fear The Walking Dead so much as opening my email, in other words, know your audience…it can be a grave error to write long or many posts if your readers don’t have time to read them. You make your readers snooze, you lose.
5. Adding images to posts amuses me, makes me laugh, makes a point, or just makes me happy. Hopefully they resonate with others.
6. Sometimes readers won’t get what you’re saying or don’t agree. Sometimes your jokes fall flat. Maybe they haven’t read the same books, watched the same movies or TV shows…Some are trolls, actively dislike you, perhaps even use your Gravatar at which to throw darts – the internet is built on people being offended, appalled, shocked, and downright grumpy. Just do what you do.
7. How can you expect people to have a deep relationship with a shallow person? Be real, write your own stuff, if that makes people think, learn, laugh, smile, cry, or even spit their coffee out…they’ll want to read more.
8. Like it or not, successful blogging has a degree of popularity. Let’s jump back to vampires, they depend on brooding, pouting, sparkling, hotness, intensity, and overacting with a penchant for black clothes, especially black leather, but blogging can’t all be about flash and no substance.
9. Get out there, enjoy other blogs, find those messages in bottles and answer them, don’t be timid about liking, sharing or commenting – let others know you’re out there. Make them feel like they’re not alone in being alone.
10. Most of you are part of a large, sprawling, at times dysfunctional, human race family, so you’ll be part of the blogging family. Like vampires, family can sometimes be a pain in the neck, but still we hunger for the connection.
What motivates us?
I’m sure the answer is different for everyone.
Praise. Power. People. Passion. Puzzles.
Possessions. Prestige. Punishment.
Pleasure. Position. Politics. Possibilities.
I know what my motivation is to eat Benedict Cumberbatch, that is, the life-size chocolate statute of Benedict Cumberbatch. Seriously, there’s now a 40kg Belgian chocolate replica of most everyone’s favourite Aspergian detective, because he was chosen as #1 dishiest UK actor in a survey. David Tennant was the runner-up. Oh I don’t know, that would be a tough call. Can I have both? Er, in chocolate?
Today is Autism Awareness Day worldwide, and those on the Autism Spectrum have often been called, differently motivated. Too many people don’t (or choose not to) understand this. Their theory seems to be if you aren’t motivated by something they can understand then you must be: stupid, lazy, defective, foolish, or a loser. Intolerance shows itself in varied ugly forms.
We’re still in the beginning stages of a long journey to try to get people to understand Autism. It’s a neurological difference. Things changed, doesn’t mean it’s terrible or catastrophic.
Some things we used to believe:
Some thought the Earth was flat (those are called pancakes).
If an elevator is falling, jump up (you’ll just hit the ceiling).
Putting sugar in a gas tank ruins the car (still not a good idea).
Spontaneous generation from inanimate objects (er, no, just no).
The human body is made up of four humors – black bile, yellow bile, phlegm, and blood (some days I wonder).
A duck’s quack doesn’t echo (it does, it does, it does).
Dropping a penny off a high building could kill someone (how about a quarter?).
Quicksand sucks you under (only in the movies).
Earth revolves around the Sun (you’re not our only friend, Sun).
we’re the center of the Universe (actually, a lot of people still believe that they’re the center of the Universe).
My son, who is the center of my Universe has Asperger’s. He’s differently motivated, but that’s not always a bad thing. He doesn’t succumb to peer pressure. He doesn’t believe everything he reads or sees – he questions. He doesn’t worship at the altar of consumerism. He thinks outside the box, actually, I’m not even sure he knows there is a box.
We should stop measuring everyone by one standard and enjoy the differences.
So whether you celebrate World Autism Awareness Day, and/or Easter – all the best!
Around this time of year people often pose the question: what’s your worst nightmare? For me, something horrible happening to my son, and the rest of my family and friends.
My nightmares, when I actually sleep, are few, but they all start the same, running. Not jogging, all comfy shoes and music, but frantic, desperate, trying-to-get-away-from-something-running. I’m not scared of the running, but of what I’m running from. Maybe that’s why I love to walk, little chance I’m leisurely strolling away from a zombie, vampire, alien, mass murderer, serial killer, etc., right?
Luckily in the nightmares my son is usually running ahead of me; he’s fast, so he makes it.
I know what you’re doing right now…hopefully reading this:
1.The origins of Halloween are ancient and include: sacrifices, celebrating Harvest, fairies, demons, feasts, Druids, Celts, scaring away spirits, appeasing spirits, passion, death, and so much more…and this is for children now, hmmm.
2. In Medieval England hearing an owl’s call meant someone was about to die, well, duh, it was Medieval England, of course someone was about to die.
3. Ireland is believed to be the birthplace of Halloween so why does no one drink green beer on October 31st?
4.Harry Houdini died on Halloween 1926…coincidence?
5. We have carved: beets, turnips, potatoes, and pumpkins for Halloween, weird amount of veggies for a candy holiday.
6. Safety first, sadly, children are twice as likely to be killed in or by a car on Halloween.
7. Some animals shelters have stopped adoptions of black cats near Halloween,because people sacrifice them. What is wrong with…sigh, I have no words.8.Orange symbolizes: Harvest, Fall, and strength. Black implies darkness and death, including the death of summer…I just like wearing it.
9.Witch comes from wicce which means wise woman. I know a lot of witches.
10.Halloween can cause poor behaviour and deindividualization. In costume, together, people care less about consequences of individual actions; doing things they normally wouldn’t do alone.
11.The Michael Myers mask in 1978’s Halloween was actually a William Shatner mask. And now he has a renovation show, William Shatner, not Michael Myers although it’s reality TV so who knows?
12.Some suggestions for definitely too-soon Halloween costumes: Sexy Hazmat suits, zombie Robin Williams, terrorist, Ray Rice dragging a doll…just don’t.
13.Halloween has had many names: All Hallows Evening, All Hallows Eve, Samhain, Witches Night, Lambswool, Haunting Night, Summer’s End, Snap-Apple Night, wait, doesn’t that last one just sound like Snapple Night? Mmmm, Snapple.
I’m celebrating 50,000+ views on my blog (Thank you! Thank you!) and the 50th anniversary (published 1964) of Charlie and the Chocolate Factory by Roald Dahl, published 1964.
Loved with this book, then I saw the movie, Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory – my mind was forever altered.
A factory full of chocolate? It was one thing to read about it, another to see a river of chocolate…
I still love the 1971 Gene Wilderversion best (directed by David L. Wolper), maybe because it’s steeped in childhood memories or because for me, it’s Gene Wilder’s definitive performance.
This is where I fell in love. Gene Wilder and chocolate. Sign me up!
Wilder is the ultimate Willy Wonka. He didn’t go over-the-top weird, instead opting for a subtle, damaged man-child who was trapped in his own reclusion, a Howard Hughes-like creative genius who couldn’t cope in a reality that wasn’t of his own making. Wilder’s transcendent blend of cordiality, callousness, awe, and animosity make you think he is Wonka, he just is.
Jack Albertson was delightful as Grandpa Joe,who apparently couldn’t get out of bed to get a job, but could dance a jig and spend the day at a chocolate factory.
Charlie Bucket is the only child Dahland Wonka even remotely like due to his meek and accommodating nature, but Charlie wasn’t as obedient as he seemed, he spent money on a chocolate bar that he wasn’t supposed to; so even in the most co-operative child Dahl found a fault.
The 1971 version was renamed Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory to cross-promote UK’s The Willy Wonka Candy Company who had bought the rights from Roald Dahl.
I never understood why Roald Dahl was classed as a children’s author, he clearly disliked children, at times rather intensely. His stories and books reflect this.
What he hated more than children were their parents, specifically parents who didn’t raise their children properly, at least from his point of view.
Imagine what Roald Dahlwould think of children and their parents now?
I recently read A Brief History of Chocolate(Steve Berry and Phil Norman) which I must warn you will not only vastly entertain and inform, but make you crave chocolate.
Despite best intentions this book lacked something, what was it? Oh yes, chocolate. They should sell each copy with a chocolate bar or coupon for a free chocolate bar. There, a marketing idea, no charge…although I’d take a thank you in chocolate bars.
I also loved the darker, creepier Tim Burton vision of Willy Wonka.
Johnny Depp played him weird and it worked. Also damaged, but in a deranged-metrosexual-game-show-host-who-moonlights-as-a-rock-star-on-acid-way.
Veruca Salt was a bad egg or nut in all versions, but really, her parents spoiled her. Also, Augustus Gloop, Mike Teevee, and Violet Beauregarde. All annoying children, but allowed, even encouraged to be so by their parents.
The first time I walked into the Hersheychocolate factory in Smith Falls, Ontario the smell was divine, like melted chocolate floating through clouds of more chocolate just before it rained chocolate.
I’ll never forget the look on my son’s face, the pure wonder as he watched row after row after row of Reese’s Peanut Butter Cupsracing happily along the conveyor belt.
I’m sure I had a similar look as I saw the giant vat of chocolate I wanted to swim in, not figuratively, literally.
No Oompa-Loompas, no chocolate waterfall, trees made of taffy, Everlasting Gobstoppers, no fizzy lifting drinks, or Wonka though, but lots of chocolate for sale and sample.
Alas Hersheyclosed the factory after 45 years, losing a great tourist attraction, and hundred of jobs. Several other large employers closed, shipping more Canadian jobs overseas, leaving 40% of the town unemployed.
Now a flame has been lit as Smith Fallsrallies; the factory at 1 Hershey Drive now produces medical marijuana, which, in a great cosmic irony would have made more people buy chocolate.
There are still times, when I open a chocolate bar wrapper and think I see a flash of gold.