Posted in Books, Movies, Televison, Uncategorized, Zombies

Why Zombies Won’t Rule

1. Zombies are, so far, an analogy for over-consumption. We don’t have to worry about zombies, we’re killing ourselves off quite effectively.

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2. Zombies seem relentless, but have no ambition, sort of like teens at a mall.

3. Zombie genre is hyper-focused on what zombies would do to humans. Not much about what nature would do to these walking smorgasbords. Nature doesn’t need fresh meat, many love decaying flesh. First the blowflies, flesh flies and maggots. Also, vultures, burying beetles, lions, wolves, dogs, eagles, hawks, coyotes, crows, raccoons, tigers, hyenas, etc. And cockroaches – they can live up to a week without a head, can’t say the same for zombies.

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4. They’re dead and only getting deader. Weather, nature, and decomposition works wonders on the complexion and can make the average zombie into a sticky puddle of botox-won’t-help-that-sweetie-mess in no time.

5.  Think of the zombie apocalypse as a Home Alone movie, but with zombies instead of inept burglars. They can’t strategize, they’re easily tricked, they don’t notice traps. Try sandbags, fences, walls, doors, boarded up windows, spikes, barbed wire, fire, or maybe even marbles, icy stairs, hot door knobs, paint cans, etc. would work.

6. No one really explains how zombies overcome the military. Zombies move toward armies, have no defenses, don’t retreat. This doesn’t even work as a Risk game.

wd707. As free-range humans become more scarce so would the food source; we’re just not that reliable. Also, we fight back.

8. Humans could get to islands, fortified or remote locations, and structures to wait until the zombies decompose.

 9. Humans generally know more about survival now, ie. Water purification tabs, weapons, decoy camps, Dakota fire pits, how to purify urine to drink it, making a stove out of a soda can, etc.wd72

10. I think Nerds will save us. They have special skills, right? Video games have taught them survival skills, including using a sniper riffle, crossbow, etc. Most already exist on processed foods. They’re used to staying up for days on end, they’re patient, and they don’t feel the need for a companionship. Also, they can figure out a way to start getting power back on, etc. They can read maps, are used to quests, and really, it’s as though they’ve been training for an apocalyptic event since the first time their hands touched a controller. Let’s hope these video game skills translate into life skills, wait, maybe I shouldn’t pin too much hope on this.

I just hope if the zombie apocalypse happens they’re the slow zombies, not the fast ones. I think I can survive the slow, shuffling ones, but those fast ones, not so much.wd75

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Posted in Books, Movies, Political, Televison, Uncategorized, Zombies

Why Zombies Will Rule

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1. Zombies won’t just be dangerous because of the biting flesh part, they’re rotting corpses. Think about all the diseases they would cause, not to mention all the scavengers and parasites they would attract. Like some people you may know, zombies are toxic, but literally.

2. Zombies don’t need to sleep.

3. They’re not distracted by TV, the internet, cell phones, etc.

4. They don’t have any vices.

5. Zombies don’t get sick, I mean eventually they decompose, but who knows how long that will take?

6. Society will fall apart if they don’t have cell phones, the internet, TV, etc.wd76

7. Sadly, Zombies will kill off children and probably their parents quickly, come on, think of how long it takes to get the average toddler to put on their shoes, get to sleep, etc…and how would they stay quiet enough? How would they be amused without technology?

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8.  Zombies don’t get bored and don’t need entertaining, they just wait around for food to be delivered to them or they wander around looking for takeout.

9. So many people are too apathetic or lazy to even get out and vote which effects your life just as much as zombies (have you seen some politicians?). How are they going to survive?

wd8810. Statistically as there are more zombies and less humans, well, you do the math…the odds are against us.

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Posted in Books, Movies, Music, Televison, Uncategorized

The Shawshank Redemption

For those that have read the novella by Stephen King I will alternately title this Rita Hayworth and the Shawshank Redemption.

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For me, both have been irreparably damaged by the Family Guy version, oh great, now I’m humming Hollaback Girl.

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This book and movie hold many messages, the most obvious one, hope.

I used to think, many years ago when I was young that no matter what anyone did to you, no matter what they took from you, you’d always have hope.

But then I began to slowly realize that hope itself could be dangerous.

When nothing or no one can hurt you.
When nothing or no one can take anything more from you.
When nothing or no one can break your heart.
Hope can.

Hope unfulfilled.
Hope crushed.
Hope ignored.
Hope betrayed.
Hope denied.
Am I cheering anyone up yet?

This is the moment shaw2when people have to choose, to take a chance that hope is a gift. Just because you’re in a hopeless position doesn’t mean you’re hopeless.

For people with chronic illness we cling to hope like it’s the side of giant mountain and we never want to look down.

That’s the power of hope. And the danger. It depends how you use it.

It’s been 20 years since we were given Frank Darabont’s (The Walking Dead) vision of Shawshank. Hey, it starred: Tim Robbins, Morgan Freeman, William Sadler, James Whitmoreand Clancy Brown, how could it be anything but coshaw6ol?

I recommend you also read King’s story and if so inclined, destroy both by watching the Family Guy take on this brilliant celebration of how you can be free or imprisoned wherever you are, it’s all about perspective.

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“My friends, love is better than anger. Hope is better than fear. Optimism is better than despair. So let us be loving, hopeful and optimistic. And we’ll change the world.”~Jack Layton