Tag: Santa

Posted in Christmas

Santa Should Be On The Naughty List

Posted on by D. Parker

https://yadadarcyyada.com/2018/12/03/santa-should-be-on-the-naughty-list/

I don’t want a lot for Christmas. There’s just one thing I need. Don’t care about the presents, shopping, or a Christmas tree – could we unblur the lines between good and bad? Make my wish come true, all I want for Christmas is less celebration of Black Hats (or Red Hats with Fur Trim), more celebration of White Hats (and cookies, definitely cookies).

https://yadadarcyyada.com/2018/12/03/santa-should-be-on-the-naughty-list/
We cheer for serial killers, drug lords, mobsters; glamorize celebrities and corporate fat cats – I hear they can even become President.

https://yadadarcyyada.com/2018/12/03/santa-should-be-on-the-naughty-list/
We’re allegedly repulsed by the violence, greed, self-absorption yet…we’re mesmerized.

https://yadadarcyyada.com/2018/12/03/santa-should-be-on-the-naughty-list/

  • Look at Santa. Or should I say: Santa Claus, Pere Noel, Father Christmas, SinterKlaas, St. Nicholas, Dun Che Lao Ren, Kris Kringle? Secret Santa indeed…he needs many aliases, with all the break and enters; sure, he leaves gifts but also a lingering sense of unease.

https://yadadarcyyada.com/2018/12/03/santa-should-be-on-the-naughty-list/

  • Some poor child still sings about being traumatized when he saw his Mommy kissing ‘Santa Claus’ underneath the mistletoe one night; how about Grandma getting run over by a reindeer, huh, whose reindeer? Take a wild guess.

https://yadadarcyyada.com/2018/12/03/santa-should-be-on-the-naughty-list/

  • Santa only works one day a year, while keeping elves slaving all year-long, to make toys, for which he takes the credit (and cookies).

https://yadadarcyyada.com/2018/12/03/santa-should-be-on-the-naughty-list/

  • Santa’s all ‘thank u, next’, he only cared about Rudolph The Red-Nosed Reindeer when he deemed Rudolph useful, not when the poor reindeer was bullied relentlessly (#BeBestSanta).

https://yadadarcyyada.com/2018/12/03/santa-should-be-on-the-naughty-list/

  • Only eight tiny reindeer? Really?!? For one cookie-stuffed man? Does that seem fair?

https://yadadarcyyada.com/2018/12/03/santa-should-be-on-the-naughty-list/

  • Santa leaves his reindeer out in the cold and snow while he goes into warm homes…and they say The Grinch treated Max poorly (he did/does!).

https://yadadarcyyada.com/2018/12/03/santa-should-be-on-the-naughty-list/

  • Elvis begged Santa to bring his ‘baby’ back to him…what other atrocities don’t we know about, is it just me or does Santa seem kinda, I dunno, elfish?

https://yadadarcyyada.com/2018/12/03/santa-should-be-on-the-naughty-list/

  • Santa tells children he’s watching them when they’re sleeping; knows if they’ve been bad or good. He browbeats children into behaving well, threatening to leave a toxic substance, a lump of coal, in their stocking – The Nice List, The Naughty List, more like The Blacklist.

https://yadadarcyyada.com/2018/12/03/santa-should-be-on-the-naughty-list/

What’s next, Santa?

  • Are you gonna lead The Sons of Santa motorcycle gang, Ho Ho SAMCRO?

https://yadadarcyyada.com/2018/12/03/santa-should-be-on-the-naughty-list/

  • Be President in The House of Christmas Cards?

https://yadadarcyyada.com/2018/12/03/santa-should-be-on-the-naughty-list/

  • Have a barbed wire baseball bat covered in with Christmas lights (P.S. You’ll poke your eye out with that thing; or someone else’s eye)?

https://yadadarcyyada.com/2018/12/03/santa-should-be-on-the-naughty-list/

  • Kill to sit on the Candy Cane Throne in the Game of Santa’s Village Thrones (you sit on a throne of lies)?

https://yadadarcyyada.com/2018/12/03/santa-should-be-on-the-naughty-list/

  • Go over to The Dark Side (they have Christmas cookies – Merry Sithmas!)?

https://yadadarcyyada.com/2018/12/03/santa-should-be-on-the-naughty-list/

  • Be known as He Who Must Not Be Named at The North Pole…Harry Potter and The Half-Eaten Gingerbread Man?

https://yadadarcyyada.com/2018/12/03/santa-should-be-on-the-naughty-list/

  • Breaking Bad Santa?

https://yadadarcyyada.com/2018/12/03/santa-should-be-on-the-naughty-list/

  • Supernatural Santa?

https://yadadarcyyada.com/2018/12/03/santa-should-be-on-the-naughty-list/

  • Rescue Me from Santa’s tyranny…Hmmm, maybe Santa should be on The Naughty List.

https://yadadarcyyada.com/2018/12/03/santa-should-be-on-the-naughty-list/

  • Santa baby, c’mon please make it right this Christmas, or at least make it wrong and interesting.

https://yadadarcyyada.com/2018/12/03/santa-should-be-on-the-naughty-list/

May Your Days Be Merry and Bright and May All Your Dreams https://yadadarcyyada.com/2017/12/18/twice-upon-a-christmas-carol/ Take Flight!

https://yadadarcyyada.com/2018/12/03/santa-should-be-on-the-naughty-list/

Advertisement

https://yadadarcyyada.com/2018/11/27/twas-the-month-before-christmas-again/

‘Twas the month before Christmas and all through the city,
Not a creature was stirring, er, you find a rhyme…
I’m really not that witty.

https://yadadarcyyada.com/2018/11/27/twas-the-month-before-christmas-again/

The stockings were hung by the chimney with care,
Oops, don’t have a chimney, hmmm…
Oh well, Santa’s magic, right, so who cares?

The people were nestled all snug in their beds,
(your business what you’re doing there).
While visions of shopping malls danced
in their wallets and heads.

https://yadadarcyyada.com/2018/11/27/twas-the-month-before-christmas-again/

I in my Soft Kitty PJs and the cat in the hat
Had just settled down to read,
maybe eat some cookies…
How about that?

https://yadadarcyyada.com/2018/11/27/twas-the-month-before-christmas-again/

When out on the street there arose such a clatter,
I sprang from my bed (sprang is a complete exaggeration),
To see what was the matter.

https://yadadarcyyada.com/2018/11/27/twas-the-month-before-christmas-again/

It was just some drunk guy,
With his nose all aglow,
Shouting and singing,
‘Let it go, let it snow, let it go…’

https://yadadarcyyada.com/2018/11/27/twas-the-month-before-christmas-again/

The moral of this story is plain to see,
Please don’t sing outside my house
At Christmas, or any other time,
Even on key!!!

https://yadadarcyyada.com/2018/11/27/twas-the-month-before-christmas-again/

‘Twas The Month Before #Christmas …Again

Quote• Posted on by D. Parker
Posted in Blogs, Canada, Cats, Chocolate, Christmas, Doctor Who, Family, Fibromyalgia, Holidays, Monty Python, Movies, Music, Parenting, Televison, Uncategorized, Zombies

Can You Feel The Blog Love Tonight?

Posted on by D. Parker

1blog52Turns out, being an adult is hard work.

Adding blogging to that and anxiety, well, it could be the proverbial straw.
When it’s quiet here on my blog, I have time to think.
Why am I really doing this?
Should I be doing this?
I have so much else to do, is this a distraction?
Or is blogging just another version of chocolate, sappy movies, wanting to cry, desperately wishing a time machine would materialize in my living room to whisk me back to a time when the biggest decisions I had to make were: what to wear to school, who to hang out with, what to listen to…Probably shouldn’t go back, I might scream at myself to quit wishing to grow up and just enjoy growing up.

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Some days I feel like blogging is more Hotline Blog (I’m assured Drake will drop this as a follow-up to his famous Hotline Bling)
You used to like me on my blog post
Late or early when I needed blog love
And I know when that hotline pinged
It could only mean one thing…
But these days, you’ve become a ghost
Wonder if you’re out there forgettin’ about my blog post
Doing other things, maybe making cinnamon toast

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But blogging isn’t all about Likes, it’s about enjoying each other…

Learning. Teaching. Laughing. Crying. Smiling.

https://yadadarcyyada.com/2015/04/10/im-hooked-on-a-feeling/
https://yadadarcyyada.com/2015/03/26/why-i-will-never-be-freshly-pressed/
https://yadadarcyyada.com/2015/06/09/to-blog-or-not-to-blog/
https://yadadarcyyada.com/2015/08/27/message-in-a-bottle/
https://yadadarcyyada.com/2015/10/16/you-cant-handle-the-blogging-truth/
https://yadadarcyyada.com/2015/05/12/i-cant-make-you-love-me/
https://yadadarcyyada.com/2015/09/26/the-phantom-of-the-blogging-tips/

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I try to imagine what my blog would have been if I blogged as a child, you know, before I knew:

1. I’d have a computer, in my home.

2. I’d use this computer to tell perfect strangers (well, maybe not perfect) stuff about my life.

3. My worst recurring nightmare wasn’t fear, it was the fear of fear.

4. Bacon would become both hero and villain.

5.  Everyone lied to me about stuff, including but not limited to: Santa, this won’t hurt (it did), The Tooth Fairy, being “almost there” (we weren’t), there was no more chocolate (there was), and that I’d use math in real life…

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6. Life is less Game of Life and more Monopoly.

7. Power is a commodity, not necessarily the one that lights up your home.

8. What skin tags are, let alone having them.

9. The world is crawling with serial killers, if TV is to be believed.

10. Some people will still be mean, even as adults.

1balls5
11. I’d use numbers from a fortune cookie for lottery tickets.

12. My body would be my worst enemy.

13. I’d look more like Jessica Fletcher than Jessica Alba.

14. I’d still be watching Doctor Who, Monty Python, and so would my teen son.

15. I’d lose hours of my life to a mysterious world that delivers weird yet amusing things to me right at home (yes, including pizza and Amazon).

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16. I’d ever tire of Christmas (well, the commercialism of Christmas).

17. I’d try figgy pudding…get out there – try, visit, read, comment, share, take part in something different.

18. I’d let zombies into my home at least once a week…and love it.

19. You can’t eat all the cake, you have to share it, same goes for blogging.

20. I’d have many families – the one I was born into, the ones I found and found me, the ones I’ve made, and this amazing blogging community.

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So get out there, hakuna matata – visit some blogs, enjoy each other, and never forget, you’re not alone.

 

Posted in Chocolate, Christmas, Holidays, Political

Enhanced Christmas Infusion Techniques

Posted on by D. Parker

1christmas44

Evil wins when it destroys our belief in good. Santa knew that better than anyone, he specialized in good, he had a list for it. He also had a list for naughty and he was going to have to add to that list.

Santa grimly looked out the window, his white gloves absently touching the papers on his desk. He knew this report would forever change the way people viewed The North Pole and possibly Christmas.

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The CIA (Christmas Intensity Agency) could be a little overzealous in their protection and advancement of Christmas, but he hadn’t known or let himself think about the lengths they might have gone to in the War on Christmas.

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In their zeal to make people believe in Christmas the CIA had done unspeakable things. People had been forced to: untangle tree lights for hours on end; eat fruitcake, gumdrops, candy, candy corn, candy canes, cookies; watch hours of Christmas movies, even the made-for-TV ones; had been sleep-deprived so no visions of sugar-plums danced in their heads; were syrupboarded; made to wear holiday cheer; stand on broken candy canes; endless Christmas songs, and even had their families threatened. Not to mention blowing a large portion of the Christmas budget and for what? The conclusion was clear, the Enhanced Christmas Infusion Techniques were not only sadistic and inhumane, but ineffective.

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Santa couldn’t understand what had caused the CIA to do such horrible things. He opened the book entitled, The Naughty List, picked up his pen and dipped it into the inkwell, shaking his head again in anger and disbelief, they’d never even asked if those people believed in Christmas.

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Evil only wins if it destroys our belief in good.

Posted in Canada, Christmas, Environment, Holidays, Political, Uncategorized

Do You Wanna Build A Snowman?

Posted on by D. Parker

“This is Anna Bjo1elves15rgman, reporting from The North Pole where it appears protesters from The Occupy Movement have set up camp to Occupy The North Pole.” Shivering in her Canada Goose parka, the young woman bravely placed the microphone in front of one of the Occupiers, “Excuse me, why has The Occupy Movement decided to Occupy The North Pole this Christmas?”

A handsome young man flashed a smile that was whiter than the snow around him before answering, “Actually, the Occupy movement is so three years ago. We’re the Change The North Pole Movement, because we believe the climate up here needs to change!”

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Pushing his iPhone6 into the pocket of his Moncler parka, Christian continued, “Santa is a fat rich old white man who has his own town, slave labour, and only works one day a year!”

Christian paused to point to the various tents, barricades, signs, and a handful of protesters milling around the streets of The North Pole. “Santa’s the ultimate symbol of capitalism! He teaches children to be materialistic!”

A beautiful young woman holding two large Starbucks cups, smiled coyly as she handed Christian one of the steaming cup, “I got your fav, Christian, Double Tall Soy Latte,” Bianca crooned before turning a dazzling smile on the reporter. “We want human need, not corporate greed!”

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The reporter, slightly stunned by all the dazzling smiles, wondered where they’d managed to find a Starbucks at The North Pole and was momentarily at a loss for words. Recovering swiftly, she nodded at her cameraman Hans to follow her as she walked with the protesters toward Santa’s Workshop. “What is it you hope to accomplish by Occupying, er, Changing The North Pole?”1elves13

Christian took a sip of his latte, looking thoughtful before answering. “The income inequality and wealth distribution between the wealthiest 1% and the rest of the population is no more obvious than here at The North Pole. The elves are the 99%. We want to bring awareness that while Santa sits around smoking a pipe, getting fatter, and being jolly, there is social and economic inequality here and worldwide.”

Bianca stepped brashly forward. “We want people to think, to ask questions, not just blindly follow the Santa Laws!” She then gaily waved at another protester and quickly texted what looked like gibberish before continuing, “There is no better slave than a slave who doesn’t know he’s a slave. I think Bono or Ariana Grande said that and they were so right. People need to wake up! People need see what’s in front of them!”

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A frigid wind raged as the reporter watched the two young people start texting, knowing she’d lost the little attention they possessed. With strains of happy Christmas songs emanating from Santa’s Workshop and chants of We Are Changing the Climate of the North Pole! behind her, the reporter smiled weakly at the camera and threw it back to the station with a simple yet bemused, “This is Anna Bjorgman, umm, do you wanna build a snowman?”

1christmas88

Posted in Christmas, Food, Holidays, Movies, Uncategorized

We are Santa’s elves

Posted on by D. Parker

1elves11Unseasonably warm, it seemed a beautiful day to go for a long walk. Little did I know chaos had broken out at The North Pole. As I wandered off to do errands and go to the library, behind the scenes, disgruntled elves had declared war on Christmas! Tired of deplorable working conditions, the Elves went on strike.

Santa seemed bemused, telling the media, “I’ve spent more money on elves, especially Veteran elves than any other Santa in the history of Santas.”

The elves shot back with a list of demands.

“We’re tired of being pushed around!” Chief SpokesElf Snowball exclaimed. “We don’t have glamorous jobs like fighting to save Middle-earth, making cookies in trees, being a warrior in Hyrule, or saving Harry Potter, we just make toys!”

Other elves murmured their agreement.

“We love making toys, but day in and day out, it’s torture!” Snowball climbed up on a festive stool to point at the growing crowd of elves. “No one talks about the harassment we endure when we go into town, we can’t even walk down the street without hearing, Hey Sugarplum, or Twinkletoes, Peppermint Buns, Angel Ears, Sprinklepants.” Snowball sat down heavily on the stool, head in hands, as if unable to carry on.

Another elf patted Snowball on the back and continued, “We want to work, but we have to sing the whole time and some elves, I won’t mention any names, cough cough, Buddy, sing loud for all to hear, off key. And why does Santa’s Workshop have to be at The North Pole, why not Aruba or Belize?” Holly sighed and raised her hands in a gesture of defeat. “We have a mandatory diet of cookies, candy canes, gingerbread, candy corn, do you know what all these gumdrops are doing to my diet?”

Cries of Here, Here! and One Two Three Four Eating Cookies is a Bore! rang through the workshop.

“We have to wear these outfits all the time,” Holly sighed, pointing down at her tacky elf outfit. “And now they’re loaning us out to sit on shelves, what’s with that?”1elves8

But while the elves were rallying, the reindeer escaped and went flying around the world, stuffing themselves on fast food and samples at Costco; getting liquored up before knocking down unsuspecting pedestrians. This is where I come in, one minute I was walking, the next I was on the ground, in the mud. The reindeer didn’t even stop, it kept talking on it’s cellphone, at least, I think it was a reindeer.

With only 19 sleeps before the Big Night, let’s hope Santa and the Elves can work this out.

Posted in Cats, Christmas, Holidays, Uncategorized

‘Twas the month before Christmas

Posted on by D. Parker

‘Twas the month before Christmas

‘Twas the month before Christmas and all through the city,
Not a creature was stirring, er, you find a rhyme…
I’m just not that witty.

The stockings were hung by the chimney with care,
Oops, don’t have a chimney, hmmm…
Oh well, Santa’s magic, who cares?

The people were nestled all snug in their beds,
(your business what you’re doing there)
While visions of shopping malls danced
in their wallets and heads.

I in my Soft Kitty PJs and the cat in the hat
Had just settled down to read,
maybe eat some cookies…
How about that?

When out on the street there arose such a clatter,
I sprang from my bed (ok, sprang is an exaggeration),
To see what was the matter.

It was only a drunk guy,
With his nose all aglow,
Shouting and singing,
Let it go, let it snow, let it go…

The moral of this story is plain to see
Please don’t sing outside my house
At Christmas or any other time,
Even on key…

1christmas33

Posted in Televison

PINKY & THE BRAIN

Posted on by D. Parker

Subtle, silly, witty, snort-your-beverage-of-choice-up-your-nose-genius.

The theme song will be in my head forever. Although I was never quite sure which one was the genius and which one was insane. Each night they tried to take over the world and failed, but kept trying. Quite a lesson in perseverance.

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This sadly only ran for 65 episodes (and I have them all!!!), but it will run through our hearts and brains forever, leaving tiny little paw prints that leave tiny little ouchies…
This isn’t a show of half measures, people either love it or hate it or possibly just miss out on its brilliance altogether.

anima5My fav lines were always when Brain (voiced by the astonishing Maurice LaMarche) would say, “Pinky, are you pondering what I’m pondering?”

Pinky (voiced by the talented Rob Paulsen) would usually have some bizarre answer like:

“I think so, Brain, but…but burlap chafes me so.” or

“I think so, Brain, but this time, you put the trousers on the chimp.” or

“I think so Brain, but pants with horizontal stripes make me look chubby.” or

“I think so, but what if the chicken won’t wear the nylons?”  Or

“I think so, Brain, but if they called them ‘Sad Meals’, kids wouldn’t buy them.” or

“Well, I think so, hiccup, but Kevin Costner with an English accent?”

“I think so, Brain, but me and Pippi Longstocking… I mean, what would the children look like?” or

“Well, I think so, Brain, but if Jimmy cracks corn, and nobody cares, why does he keep doing it?”

And it’s all funnier in his Cockney accent and throw in a:  narf, zort, poit, and a troz and you’ve got yourself a lot of laughs.

anima8

Posted in Movies, Televison, Uncategorized

MEAN GIRLS

Posted on by D. Parker

christmas260Snapping jaws…clutching claws…putrid, dank, evil swirling all around you as you struggle for your very survival. Bodies shuffling around, intent on their prey, with no hope of escape…sounds like the zombie apocalypse, but really just high school.

Ok, this Tina Fey classic is prone to amplification and hyperbole, but it is a difficult time for some teens. For others, it’s unbearable.
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This movie is a funny look at how quickly things can escalate and spiral out of control.

The Christmas/Winter Talent Show was sadly hilarious.

Almost difficult to watch knowing how much Lindsay Lohan went from being a promising actress to a tabloid joke.

All in all, little silly, but had some good points.christmas263

Posted in Books, Christmas, Family, Holidays, Movies, Music, Parenting, Political, Televison, Uncategorized

War on Christmas

Posted on by D. Parker

chrisstmas10There’s a War on Christmas? Using terms like Happy Holidays and Season’s Greetings suggest that Christmas is being attacked? Wow, I didn’t know Christmas was that insecure or vulnerable. Kind of makes a mockery out of the soldiers who fight in real wars.

I love Christmas. Especially what used to be the spirit of Christmas. People caring about others. Although that seems to have dimmed over the years. Now it’s about rushing and shopping and whining and complaining and First World Problems…

Stores use terms like Season’s Greetings and Happy Holidays to allegedly be inclusive. It’s really to extend the shopping period. The sustained commercialism has made for sustained greetings. To sell more.
Christmas decorations in malls, city streets, etc. up before Halloween, before Remembrance Day.
They blast Christmas music into stores for months.
Santa Claus parades block the streets.
More cars congest the streets and highways.
Christmas movies swarming the airwaves for 2-3 months per year.

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Others started using Happy Holidays and Seasons Greetings to reflect the Christian holiday wasn’t the only religious or non-religious celebration this time of year. Wait, we wouldn’t want to include others in a time of giving.

What about people who don’t celebrate Christmas? Or those who don’t want it extended? Can you imagine Christmas if you weren’t Christian? Or maybe didn’t like Christmas? Or don’t have family and friends to celebrate with?
You can’t go to a store to get a pair of socks without crowds; blaring Christmas songs; people running around like it’s the zombie apocalypse (that might be more fun); low or no stock; and very harried store personnel.

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I suppose some believe the ‘Christ’ part of Christmas is being attacked. Times have changed, people seem to worship their cell phones more than Christ. And I doubt all the scandals that have rocked the various religions have helped.

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Does someone saying Happy Holidays offend you? Does it offend Christ? If you have a strong faith in something, don’t you believe despite the odds?
If you receive a Christmas card that says Season’s Greetings does it make the fact that someone bought a card, wrote in it, addressed it, sent it to you via snail mail mean less?

The term, War on Christmas was popularized by a FOX News host, that should tell you something. Politicians, pundits, celebrities, charities all exploit Christmas to further their agendas just as many corporations, stores, charities, churches, etc exploit it to make money. John Gibson was simply regurgitating the whining with his book, The War on Christmas: How the Liberal Plot to Ban the Sacred Christian Holiday Is Worse than You Thought.

Yet Christmas is bigger than ever. Santa is still selling Coke. Jesus is still praised at midnight masses. The War On Christmas is failing. Commercialism is still going strong.

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If you want Christ in Christmas, he’s there.
If you want the Grinch in Christmas, he’s there. If you want to just enjoy the season…enjoy it.

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Looks like we’re stuck with Christmas three months a year and for me, it’s a bit much, but it doesn’t steal away my love of Christmas…but it does keep me away from shopping.

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Posted in Christmas, Movies, Televison, Uncategorized

GREMLINS

Posted on by D. Parker

christmas123When you think of Christmas movies, Gremlins probably doesn’t spring to mind. Yet this 1984 horror comedy is a Christmas movie.
Despite the fact that Gizmo was cute and the movie had massive marketing of toys, video games, etc. this is not a cuddly Christmas movie; not for children or those disturbed by violence and graphic scenes.

GREMLINS bits and pieces:

Howie Mandel did the voice of Gizmo, the Mogwai.

Roald Dahl (Charlie and the Chocolate Factory) 1943 book, The Gremlins influenced the director, Joe Dante.

During World War II, aircraft mechanical failures were jokingly blamed on gremlins or small creatures.

A WWII era Bugs Bunny cartoon had Bugs harassed and battling a gremlin on an airplane.

In Nightmare at 20,000 Feet, a 1963 William Shatner Twilight Zone episode he sees a gremlin on the wing of the plane trying to destroy it. There’s…something…on…the…wing!!!twilightzone6John Lithgow re-enacted it in Twilight Zone: The Movie then he and Shatner referenced the scenes when they were together as Father and Son on 3rd Rock From The Sun.

In The Simpsons Treehouse of Horror IV, Terror at 5 1/2 Feet, a gremlin attacks the school bus…

Look at the set for Kingston Falls closely, it’s the same one they used as Hill Valley in the Back to the Future movies.

There was never supposed to be a Mogwai named Stripe.  Gizmo was to turned into Stripe, but Gizmo was so cute they’d keep him around for the whole film.christmas117Gremlins and Indiana Jones: The Temple of Doom were so violent the ratings were changed, on the suggestion of Steven Spielberg, and the PG-13 rating was created.

Howie Mandel learned to say “Bright light!” in several languages so he could dub the movie in various countries and do appearances and promos.

When Billy is walking by the movie marquee we see the titles A Boy’s Life which was the original title for E.T. the Extra-Terrestrial and Watch the Skies which was the working title for Close Encounters of the Third Kind. Spielberg loves to put this stuff for movie buffs.

Steven Spielberg did a rare cameo as the man with the broken leg riding recumbent bicycle. His suitcase says SS Enterprises.

Merry Christmas and remember, if you get a Mogwai as a gift:
1. Never expose it to bright light;
2. Never get it wet;
3. Never, ever feed it after midnight.christmas120

Posted in Christmas, Movies, Televison, Uncategorized

A CHRISTMAS STORY

Posted on by D. Parker

christmas7730 years since we first heard Ralphie‘s teacher, Mom, Santa, basically everyone tell Ralphie Parker (Peter Billingsley) he was going to shoot his eye out with the Red Ryder BB Gun he so desperately wanted for Christmas…

30 years since Flick got his tongue frozen to the flagpole…christmas104

30 years since the neighbour dog ate the Parkers’ Christmas turkey so they went out for Chinese food…

30 years since The Battle of the Lamp when Ralphie’s parents fight over the lamp shaped like a woman’s leg wearing a fishnet stocking that Mr. Parker (The Old Man) had won that came in box marked Fragile or “Fra-gee-lay. That must be Italian”.christmas106

What is it about this movie that people love?

Because it portrays a simpler time?

It’s authenticity, haven’t we all had or heard conversations just like in this movie?

Waiting in line to see Santa?

Evading or fighting bullies?

Wanting something soooooooo badly?

Or the flat tire scene?

Flick with his tongue on the flagpole cause, well, he was triple dog dared to do it?

The heroic narration of the film with classical music to punctuate the epicness?

The pink bunny PJs which make Ralphie believe his Aunt Clara thinks he’s perpetually 4 years old and apparently, a girl? Or is it all of this and more?

Whatever it is, it works. Still funny after 30 years.christmas78Mrs. Parker: Randy, will you eat? There are starving people in China!
Randy: [groans and shoves spoon into his mouth]

My Mom, also Mrs. Parker used to tell us to eat our vegetables because children were starving in Africa…I was more than willing to send them my peas.

Posted in Uncategorized

RUDOLPH THE RED-NOSED REINDEER

Posted on by D. Parker

ImageThis used to be on once a Christmas season when I was a child, like A Charlie Brown Christmas, Frosty The Snowman, and How the Grinch Stole Christmas. Now it’s on many times a season, of course the season is now almost 3 months long. Also available on DVD, download, streamed, etc.

But there was something special in knowing it was only on one night a year. My parents would be on their way out to a Christmas party, in fancy clothes and smelling so good as they leaned down to kiss my brother and me good night. In theory we were supposed to be asleep when they got home. We had pizza made from the box mix, after all, it was a special occasion. We had pop which was rare threat. We made popcorn in the air popper with its special butter tray. My crazy cat would run and sit on the back on my Dad’s chair and beg for some of the melted butter. The fire was crackling. Or other nights with the same scene except my parents were home and we’d be laughing, joking around, watching the Christmas specials, it was fun because they only came on once a year. I wonder if our abundance or even overabundance has made things less special in some ways. christmas60

Rudolph, Santa’s 9th reindeer was a simple story of accepting others for their differences, embracing diversity. Rudolph was bullied for his differences until they realized different doesn’t mean bad. They added a few characters to this stop animation classic, adding to 1939 poem written by Robert L. May. And of course, The Island of Misfit Toys which was 2001 sorta sequel.

I hope Christmas can still have special moments for young and young at heart…christmas62

Posted in Chocolate, Christmas, Movies

Elf

Posted on by D. Parker

https://yadadarcyyada.com/2013/12/02/elf/

Happy Birthday Buddy! Hard to believe it’s been 10 years since Elf  first charmed us on the big screen and has been in our homes and hearts since.

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Buddy (Will Ferrell) is everything good about Christmas and people.
He believes.
He loves unconditionally.
He makes a rocking horse out of a TV unit.
He adds maple syrup to spaghetti.

https://yadadarcyyada.com/2013/12/02/elf/
He puts the star on the Christmas tree in a very special, Chevy Chase-like way.
He goes up an escalator like no one else.
He uses Etch-A-Sketch in miraculous ways.
He sees magic and joy everywhere.
He doesn’t judge.
He loves life and he enjoys every minute.
And the best part?
He gives his gift of joy and love for all to share.

https://yadadarcyyada.com/2013/12/02/elf/

Fun notes about Elf:

Remember Peter Billingsley who played Ralphie in A Christmas Story?  He makes a delightful cameo in Elf as Ming Ming (the Elf who tries to help Buddy be a productive toy maker at The North Pole).

https://yadadarcyyada.com/2013/12/02/elf/Yup, that really is Zooey Deschanel singing in Elf. Baby, It’s Cold Outside (not my fav Christmas song, it’s actually kind of creepy) is sung by Leon Redbone and Zooey Deschanel.

https://yadadarcyyada.com/2013/12/02/elf/Elf uses a method of filming called forced perspective to make Buddy the Elf (a human raised by Elves) look so much larger than the other elves, including Papa Elf played by the awesome Bob Newhart.Peter Dinklage, who plays arrogant and cranky children’s book author Miles Finch now appears as Tyrion Lannister in HBO’s Game of Thrones. Check him out in The Station Agent, he’s fantastic, as always.

https://yadadarcyyada.com/2013/12/02/elf/Elf was filmed in New York City and British Columbia, Canada.

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Ray Harryhausen was the voice of the Polar Bear Cub. Harryhausen was a genius visual effects creator, and a writer and producer best known for his stop-motion model animation (Mysterious Island, Jason and the Argonauts, First Men in the Moon, One Million Years B.C., Clash of the Titans, The 7th Voyage of Sinbad, It Came from Beneath the Sea, etc.). Sadly, Mr. Harryhausen passed in May 2013. Remember the restaurant in Monsters Inc.? Harryhausen’s, a nod to a legend.

https://yadadarcyyada.com/2013/12/02/elf/Will Ferrell doesn’t do his own 12 second belch (yes, and it turns out when we’re talking about belching, 12 seconds is a looooong time) in the pop burp scene. But it’s a real belch, done by the brilliant and talented Canadian voice actor, Maurice LaMarche. Maurice LaMarche is the man of a million voices, my fav, the voice of the Brain from Pinky and Brain and Animaniacs (Are you pondering what I’m pondering?). Also, he played Wakko Warner which completely explains the belching. He was the voice of Sylar on Heroes, later played by Zachary Quinto. Other works include: The Little Mermaid, The Simpsons, Futurama, Batman: The Animated Series, Ed Wood, Disney’s House of Mouse, and so much more.https://yadadarcyyada.com/2013/12/02/elf/

 If you haven’t seen this movie because you think it’s silly, or childish, or you can’t stand Will Ferrell…well, sure it might be all those things and more, but give it a chance – it’s also funny, like, laugh out loud hurt your sides funny, charming, poignant, addictive, with a ton of great messages. And it’s really a case of, you’ve got to see it to believe it.https://yadadarcyyada.com/2013/12/02/elf/

Posted in Uncategorized

NATIONAL LAMPOON’S CHRISTMAS VACATION

Posted on by D. Parker

christmas45It’s beginning to look a lot like dysfunctional Christmas…

How best to describe Christmas Vacation? Tacky. Crass. Vulgar. But oh so funny. If you’re not a fan of Chevy Chase, you probably won’t like it, after all, it’s a star vehicle, as with all the other ‘Vacation‘ movies.  Image

Randy Quaid is brilliant or well, what’s the opposite of brilliant? Eddie.

Anyone recognize Rusty (this one, also played by Anthony Michael Hall, Ethan Embry, etc. in the various Vacation movies) – Johnny Galecki, Leonard on Big Bang Theory. 

If you haven’t watched this several times in a lifetime, I’d say you’re missing out or maybe you’re the wise one.Image

That poor, poor cat.christmas43

Posted in Movies, Televison, Uncategorized

SCROOGED

Posted on by D. Parker

ImageThis progressive, uproarious retelling of Charles Dickens’ A Christmas Carol is arguably one of the best Christmas movies of all time. Only downside, to show how much Christmas is being exploited they kind of had to exploit Christmas. Awkward.
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Bill Murray is hysterical, hilarious perfection as Frank Cross/Scrooge, a ruthless, jaded TV programming exec who has lost the most valuable things on his way to the top: love, family, and joy.

As he struggles to produce a-wacked-out-makes-no-sense-at-all-conmercialized live version of A Christmas Carol, his life imitates art and he’s visited by his decaying mentor and 3 ghosts with issues, a guy who’s gunning for his job and a guy gunning for him.Image

It’s a wild ride until Murray sees the error of his ways and Puts A Little Love in His Heart. Come on, it’s Bill Murray and Christmas…christmas34