Posted in Canada, COVID-19, Movies

Some Like It Hot

It’s so hot…how hot is it?

It’s so hot cows are giving evaporated milk (mmm, now I’m thinking of hot chocolate https://yadadarcyyada.com/2019/05/30/you-live-you-die-in-between-theres-chocolate/).

It’s so hot, Optimus Prime transformed into an air conditioner.

It’s so hot I tried to bake sourdough bread but it ended up as toast; I didn’t really, I never turn my oven on between May-October, why heat the place up just to cool it down?

It’s so hot my clothes iron themselves (https://yadadarcyyada.com/2015/03/26/why-i-will-never-be-freshly-pressed/).

I’d say it’s so hot it “gives me fever” (“Oh, keep your social distance, don’t you kiss me, don’t you hold me tight; report your fever, it’s only right!”), but these days, I’d be bombarded by Purell and swabs.

I’m a slow processor, in the heat, even more so. Picture me as a vintage (old?) IBM, or on good days, an iMac, or Windows 95, a great day, Windows Vista…

I could blame my Fibrofog from Fibromyalgia   https://yadadarcyyada.com/2019/11/22/99-problems-and-fibromyalgia-is-all-of-them/

I could blame my anxiety, which is fear’s outside voice. https://yadadarcyyada.com/2020/03/17/im-still-standing-yeah-yeah-yeah/

I now think anxiety is the price you pay for awareness (being woke?) and imagination. I need to hug myself; teaching fear to use it’s inside voice.   https://yadadarcyyada.com/2019/02/06/dont-stop-me-now/

I could blame my life circumstances https://yadadarcyyada.com/2019/03/25/welcome-to-your-life/  https://yadadarcyyada.com/2020/05/04/so-no-one-told-you-life-was-gonna-be-this-way/ illnesses, poor internet, financial issues, COVID-19, racism, sexism, ableism, and so many other isms (ismz?). 

Those are factors, but also, how I respond. I need some alone time and silence to do so. Some people won’t respect that, which they should (we’d all get a better result).

The bigger the computation, the more time alone/silence I need to process; especially with other factors like: handling input from others, sending output, memory factors, outside factors, sigh, I’m gonna need a bigger CPU aka brain, or a good, long defragging…

Reading is a good thing to do when it’s hot…recently read a lovely book by Holly Hepburn,”The Picture House by the Sea” whose pages overflow with mouth-watering movies, gelato, romance, and the seaside – what’s not to like?

It prodded me to rewatch Dirty Dancing https://yadadarcyyada.com/2017/06/02/nobody-puts-bloggers-in-a-corner/

and Some Like It Hot.

Some Like It Hot is a 1959 classic American black and white romcom (I might as well face it I’m addicted to love), authentically/lovingly directed and produced by Billy Wilder, starring a shiver-inducing cast, Marilyn Monroe, Tony Curtis and Jack Lemmon. That’s hot.

This film should have been scandalous, and it was, but also: absurd, hilarious, fun/funny, and hugely popular. It was/is, as ‘the kids’ say, fire.

What do you think the title is about? Weather, uncomfortable women’s foundation garments (no Spanx for you!), sex (or gender, to each their own, J.K. Rowling),

and/or Jazz – I say all of the aforementioned. 

Hmmm, I’m hearing a song in my head, wasn’t “Some Like it Hot” also a ‘80s song by Power Station, a band including Robert Palmer and members of Duran Duran…did that happen, or is the heat starting to make me hallucinate?

The weather out there…Baby, It’s Hot Outside. I really can’t stay…Baby, I have A/C and ice…

 

Posted in Books, Christmas

The Cat’s Pajamas Birthday Party

https://yadadarcyyada.com/2016/12/15/the-cats-pajamas-birthday/Resistance can suck. It’s draining to be straining, pulling this way and that, feeling like you’re going nowhere, fast…I’m trying to think of it as a chance to build emotional muscles. Note the word ‘trying’. I guess I could also think of it as The Facts of Life or Growing Pains (RIP Alan Thicke, I’ll never get the TV themes you wrote out of my head).https://yadadarcyyada.com/2016/12/15/the-cats-pajamas-birthday/

I’m trying to resist the siren call of Netflix (note the word ‘trying’ again). Christmas movies/specials (even I can OD on those) and politics dominate the tube (don’t even get me started); most shows are taking a holiday break – Z Nation, Westworld, The Walking Dead…

https://yadadarcyyada.com/2016/12/15/the-cats-pajamas-birthday/

…so I’m reading.

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It’s a busy time of year and if you’re still looking for Christmas gifts I can help https://yadadarcyyada.com/2015/12/18/these-arent-the-gifts-youre-looking-for/

https://yadadarcyyada.com/2016/12/15/the-cats-pajamas-birthday/

With an emphasis on the gift of reading. New, almost new, new to you, gently used, regifted – books bought from wherever, or a gift certificate or e-certificate for books or ebooks. While it might be difficult to resist the bestseller list, why not try some indie authors, they’re the cat’s pajamas, remember, best-selling doesn’t mean it’s the best book. Shop local and/or shop within your blogging community. Buy from the author or go on Amazon (dot whatever your country) and look up some of these authors – ebooks download in a flash.

https://yadadarcyyada.com/2016/12/15/the-cats-pajamas-birthday/

https://yadadarcyyada.com/2016/12/15/the-cats-pajamas-birthday/Many indie authors are also bloggers, like Teagan Riordain Geneviene, https://teagansbooks.com a skillful storyteller who’ll keep you chained to your book/ereader/smartphone/tablet/laptop for hours with her brilliant books, Atonement, Tennessee (https://yadadarcyyada.com/2015/10/03/sweet-dreams-are-made-of-this/ – my copy is so well-read it looks ancient) and The Three Things Serial Story: A Little 1920s Story which began as an interactive serial, readers/bloggers gave suggestions, three things each which were woven into the story. I just finished re-reading it and it’s the cat’s meow, as swanky and entertaining as I remember.

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Make sure you drop by Teagan’s blog, I’ve heard rumours of a 1920s blog party https://teagansbooks.com/2016/12/16/1920s-party-three-things-serial-story/ – Silks and Bathtub gin will be flowing…

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In keeping with the Roaring 20s, I saw Fantastic Beasts and Where To Find Them, from the J.K. Rowling book. I shared part of my about-to-expire-gift-certificate-for-two, since I went alone,with an older couple – see how easy it is to spread  more Christmas cheer? I loved the Hidden Figures, Wonder Woman, and King Arthur previews and the movie itself brought back the wonder, the magic of early Harry Potter books/movies.

https://yadadarcyyada.com/2016/12/15/the-cats-pajamas-birthday/

There are bloggers who never fail put a smile on the face of those who visit his blogs, like David, an author and a Lord:
https://yadadarcyyada.com/2015/10/09/you-may-say-im-a-dreamer/
https://barsetshirediaries.wordpress.com/

https://yadadarcyyada.com/2016/12/15/the-cats-pajamas-birthday/
And so many more:
Tess https://letscutthecrap.wordpress.com/
John http://www.johnhowell.com
Mary https://maryjdresselbooks.com/
Debby http://dgkayewriter.com/
Sally https://smorgasbordinvitation.wordpress.com/
Olga http://authortranslatorolga.com/

https://yadadarcyyada.com/2016/12/15/the-cats-pajamas-birthday/

Ned  https://nedhickson.com/
Mary http://www.marysmith.co.uk/
Arthur https://pouringmyartout.com/
Janice http://www.mostlyblogging.com
Cynthia https://cynthiasreyes.com/
Luccia https://lucciagray.com/
Hugh https://hughsviewsandnews.com/

https://yadadarcyyada.com/2016/12/15/the-cats-pajamas-birthday/
And bloggers helping authors and bloggers, like the delight ladies of #BloggersPitStop:
https://www.kathleenaherne.com/the-blog/
http://www.mostlyblogging.com/
http://coachdebbieruns.com/
http://www.pkjulesworld.com/

Everyone over at #FridayFrivolity blog party:
http://www.devastateboredom.com/
http://syncopatedmama.blogspot.ca/
http://www.babiafi.co.uk/
http://www.stayathomeyogi.com/
http://www.thatrecipe.com/blog/
http://munofore.com/

https://yadadarcyyada.com/2016/12/15/the-cats-pajamas-birthday/
#FridayFrolics linky party: http://lifeloveanddirtydishes.com/friday-frolics/

https://yadadarcyyada.com/2016/12/15/the-cats-pajamas-birthday/
Throwback fun at #TrafficJamWeekend linky party:
http://beingawordsmith.com/
http://www.lainaturner.com/
http://frugalcouponcrazy.us/
http://epicmommyadventures.com/
http://www.eclecticevelyn.com/
https://livingmommywood.blogspot.ca/
http://www.marriage-reset.com/

https://yadadarcyyada.com/2016/12/15/the-cats-pajamas-birthday/
Danny  https://dreambigdreamoften.co/
Opinionated Man https://aopinionatedman.com/
Chris the Story Reading Ape https://thestoryreadingapeblog.com/
Christine http://cerobinsonauthor.com
And so many more! If I missed anyone, leave your links below at my birthday party or over at my ongoing blog party https://yadadarcyyada.com/2016/12/08/dear-santa-i-can-explain/ Go indie, they’re the cat’s meow!

https://yadadarcyyada.com/2016/12/15/the-cats-pajamas-birthday/

I love books from Random House, Simon and Schuster, etc., but I also love smaller publishing houses – Open Court, Jessica Kinsley Publishing, Page Street Publishing, BenBella Books, Agate, Sasquatch and the list goes on; bigger doesn’t always mean better. If you’re not only a gifter, or a reader, but a writer and want to be an author, go out there and get published, one way or another https://yadadarcyyada.com/2015/06/21/how-to-get-your-book-published/

https://yadadarcyyada.com/2016/12/15/the-cats-pajamas-birthday/

I’ve given up resisting the lure of Christmas baking,

https://yadadarcyyada.com/2016/12/15/the-cats-pajamas-birthday/

and once again I will be checking into Clementine rehab in January,

https://yadadarcyyada.com/2016/12/15/the-cats-pajamas-birthday/

but I’m strangely trying to resist some forms of giving, ie when people tell you to give a 100%, that’s ridiculous, what if I gave 100% of my blood, or lent someone a 100% of my money, or gave them 100% of my time? The holidays are a time of giving, but one of the best gifts, remembering not everyone has someone https://yadadarcyyada.com/2015/11/22/how-to-get-away-with-christmas/ Please give your time, ideas, blood, items, whatever, not just in the holiday season, but all year round. https://yadadarcyyada.com/2016/12/15/the-cats-pajamas-birthday/

Speaking of giving, don’t forget to drop by (or drop by again and again, give the gift of up to 12 links, they don’t need to be Christmas related) my ongoing blog party, my Christmas card to my blogging family/friends https://yadadarcyyada.com/2016/12/08/dear-santa-i-can-explain/

https://yadadarcyyada.com/2016/12/15/the-cats-pajamas-birthday/
Christmas is almost here and my birthday,

https://yadadarcyyada.com/2016/12/15/the-cats-pajamas-birthday/

then 2016 ends. Who know what 2017 will bring? Be open to all the possibilities, don’t pine for what might have been, it might never have been what you really wanted, or needed. All the best to you and yours in this the holiday season and all the year through and to a Happy New Year!

https://yadadarcyyada.com/2016/12/15/the-cats-pajamas-birthday/

Posted in Blogs, Books, Chocolate, Family, Movies, Televison, Uncategorized

How To Get Your Book Published

1funny608As a writer I’ve read literally (that might not be the correct use of that word) thousands of articles on ‘how to get your book published’.

Then I noticed something strange about all of those articles, something they all had in common – they’d all been written by published authors.

What? This is a complete travesty! There are so many more of us, unpublished writers, looking for work and those authors are hogging the spotlight. They get books published, then they get articles published about how to get published. What a scam!

I’ve read enough self-help books to know what had to be done, those books (ironically, also written by published authors) clearly tell us that if you want something bad enough, you just have to imagine it, wish for it, and you’ll get it. Or was that a book about fairy tales?

Anyway…here’s my version of imagining it, wishing for it, my 12 easy steps to get your book published, I mean, how hard could it be, there are whole buildings full of books.

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How To Get Your Book Published:

1. Write a book.

2. Books or manuscripts (as they say in the biz) are generally typed on typing thingies. Some famous writers in history seemed to prefer typewriters, who knows, maybe they didn’t know about computers back then, I don’t have all the answers. I suggest going for a more personalized approach – handwriting your book. Publishers will appreciate your dedication and they’ll understand you really want this book deal.

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3. Go on a book tour. Don’t wait for your book to be published, the public is hungry for your words, bring them to the masses. Go to a book store and start telling customers all about your book. Sign books they’re holding or books on the store shelves – someday when you’re famous they’ll thank you for it.

4. Get an agent. As exciting as it might be, not a secret or special agent.

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5. You need a literary-sounding name. If your name isn’t already literary-sounding, change it to something like: J.K. Rowling, Dan Brown, Dr. Seuss, Jane Austen, Stephen King, Stephenie Meyer, George R.R. Martin, Shakespeare, E.L. James, Suzanne Collins, Agatha Christie – something really authory.

6. Writing for children is different from writing for adults. For example, don’t use the name Stephen King or anything he writes about…ever.

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7. Have family and friends write glowing book blurbs and reviews. If possible, have them use a well-known authory name, see #5 for examples.

8. People love pictures. You should totally get some of those.

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9. Have characters in your book. Characters is just a fancy literary term for people you write about, either made-up people or those you know (I doubt anyone will sue you).

10. People like when characters do stuff in books. Have your characters stay busy. I don’t want to tell you what to write, but supernatural, scary, science, and sex (or a combination thereof) fly off the shelves. Have fictitious people who don’t even slightly resemble your siblings, parents, children, boss, ex, celebrities, anyone, living or dead or undead, doing fictitious (nudge nudge, wink wink) stuff.

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11. Have your publisher help you promote your book. Sorry, did I skip that part? Get a publisher, preferably one who showers you with money, then get them to help promote your book (see #1).

12. Be prepared. Get ready, not only for fame and fortune, but to discuss and possibly explain your book, at length, on or in: TV, radio, podcasts, blogs, forums, bathroom stalls, Twitter, Facebook, YouTube, Skype, planes, trains, automobiles, restaurants, conventions, parties, family gatherings, fan sites, stalker fan sites, book signings (see #3 and don’t forget to bring a pen) – yes, everywhere and mostly to people who haven’t actually read your book.

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Now you’ve done all the hard work. Take some ‘me time’, relax in a bubble bath, have some tea or wine.

Let those royalties roll in and remember, show some love to those who helped you out. You’re welcome.

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