Posted in sleep, Uncategorized

Follow Your Dreams. Go To Bed.

https://yadadarcyyada.com/2016/11/17/follow-your-dreams-go-to-bed/ I’m tired of being told to sleep. Even more tired of being told to sleep more. You’d think I sleep in a crib with bunny sheets, stuffies, and a Nightmare Before Christmas mobile for the amount I’m told to go to sleep. Everyone is telling me to sleep, wishing me a good night’s sleep, telling me all about the importance of sleep. Magazines and blog posts tell me to sleep. Books tell me to sleep. Family and friends tell me to sleep. TV tells me to sleep, even provides programs that attempt to bore me to sleep, nice try TV, still awake.

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I’m mocked by the benefits of sleep. I know that sleep is connected to the brain and it’s the most important organ, then again, look what’s telling me that, my left brain barely knows what my right brain is doing.

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Sleep promotes creativity, attention, apparently it helps heal, restore, keeps anxiety, depression, colds and other ailments at bay, and improves memory….Hmm, what were we talking about? Oh yes, sleep. It helps you lose weight, build muscle, stop inflammation. Doesn’t sleep sound amazing?

https://yadadarcyyada.com/2016/11/17/follow-your-dreams-go-to-bed/

I crave sleep, like it’s a plump juicy strawberry covered in rich chocolate nestled on fluffy clouds of whipped cream. I dream of sleep. I covet it. Sometimes sleep envy eats at me like a rat gnawing on cotton candy at a country fair.

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I worship sleep, who needs celebrities, I only want to imitate sleep, I want to be sleep. Hi sleep – I’m your #1 fan (and those aren’t pillows).

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I even snuggle with my bed, swaddling it with a decent thread count, soft blue sheets decorated with sheep, each with their own number, jumping over fences. My room is almost as dark as the bottom of the Mariana Trench, perhaps darker than the Batcave when Batman can’t find the light-switch.https://yadadarcyyada.com/2016/11/17/follow-your-dreams-go-to-bed/I slept during the first trimester of pregnancy, I’d do just about anything for sleep, but, ummm, well…

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Like many with Fibromyalgia https://yadadarcyyada.com/2013/08/31/fibromylagia-is-just-another-word-for-lazy/ https://yadadarcyyada.com/2013/08/08/fibromyalgia-is-a-four-letter-word/ I’ve tried: melatonin, serotonin, valerian, chamomile, progressive muscle relaxation, sleeping pills, tryptophan, alcohol, Tai Chi, yoga, meditation, alien cuddle exercises…

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sleep masks, abdominal breathing, cognitive behaviour therapy, kava, but no, my alpha waves are trouble makers. Is it any wonder I love the band R.E.M.? I’ve even thought of building a wall between my alpha waves and my delta waves and make the alpha waves pay for the wall. And now as an added bonus I’m playing that hot new game: blankets on, blankets off, blankets on, blankets off…what was the prize again?

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Insomnia has some benefits. I get exercise walking and I experience the, er, inspiration of public transit because I won’t drive when tired. I’ve also been organizing my home on the theory if I’m extremely organized I’ll sleep better. So far, no luck, but maybe obsessively organized people are just be too lazy to search for stuff. I wouldn’t want to be seen as lazy.

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I wish I could use the time to write or do something else productive, but alas, after a certain hour my mind is more or less mush.

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You can’t always get what you want, like sleep, but that doesn’t mean you just give up. You keep going, keep trying, keep reaching, whether it’s for a forty winks, a job, losing weight, climbing Mount Everest, seeking to right wrongs, swimming the English Channel, help others, being an author, scientist, artist, astronaut, singer, teacher, leader…

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I do have ambiguous feelings about a creepy Sandman sneaking into my room, or some strange Greek god invading my dreams, shudder, what form would he take on these days, no thanks, Morpheus. It’s not like I’m asking to be Rip Van Winkle or Sleeping Beauty, just less tired.

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Maybe I could think of my insomnia as a fascinating quirk, but all things considered, I’d rather be sleeping.

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Happy Thanksgiving to all those who celebrate (it should be every single day!) and remember, shopping is not the true meaning of being thankful…really.

https://yadadarcyyada.com/2016/11/17/follow-your-dreams-go-to-bed/

“Did you sleep well?”
“No, I made a couple of mistakes.”
~Steven Wright

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Posted in Autism, Books, Parenting, Uncategorized

There are worse things I could do

Spring has sprung, 1anxiety4
the grass has riz
and everywhere
the birdies is.

That was my Dad’s way of letting us know, it was Spring.

On this beautiful Spring-like day, I’m settling for the sin of cleaning.
Cleaning, sinful? For someone with Asperger’s, who like things a certain way and don’t like changes, it’s a terrible transgression.
It’s all how we see things – making things fresh and clean or adding lots of weird smells and moving things, possibly moving them out of order?
I clean less than Martha Stewart, but my son, the Aspie thinks I clean way too much. Which got me thinking about balance.1anxiety8

1anxiety1Overcoming Anxiety and Depression on the Autism Spectrum by Lee A, Wilkinson, PhD (Jessica Kingsley Publishers), was a timely book to read today when I borrowed the digital copy from Netgalley.com for an honest review.

Cognitive Behavior Therapy can help people restore balance, whether they’re on the Autism Spectrum or not.
It’s about changing your way of thinking.
Taking a bad, sad, mad, or scary thought and changing how you look at it.
It’s like taking a old, clean sock, soaking it in equal parts water and vinegar and using it to clean your blinds and windows so you can see more clearly.
Don’t forget to use the other sock to dry them.

There’s nothing wrong with being sad, mad, or scared, but how we handle those thoughts can be like washing a cast iron pan with soap and water instead of coarse salt and water. We want it to last and reach its full potential, so don’t forget TLC (for the pan, some oil).

CBT helps manage and overcome difficulties, in a straightforward way, making a complicated situation less so.
Like when you use your blender, helpful, but now it’s messy. Instead of taking it apart to clean, or trying to clean around the blades, potentially causing more harm, pour in hot water and dish soap, lid on, then blend. Just rinse, dry and store.
1anxiety6

Wilkinson is excellent at explaining the anxiety, depression, and isolation caused by social skills deficits and cognitive issues, and how they can be alleviated and managed through CBT.
Too often people with anxiety or depression are told to: just stop, grow up, smarten up, man up, or they’re defective or attention-seeking, etc.
Trying to clean a cutting board used for cutting raw chicken with only soap and water or bleach. Think that fixes the problem?
1anxiety7No, but a lemon cut in half with salt on it would do the trick.

So there are worse things I can do than Spring cleaning…if we find the right balance, there’s little or no anxiety for my son and our home is sparkling.

For now.

Posted in Movies, Televison, Uncategorized

Robin Williams: His Last Laugh

https://yadadarcyyada.com/2014/08/12/robin-williams-his-last-laugh/Suicide isn’t a laughing matter. Neither is depression.

Have we lost the ability to see that line between genuinely mourning the loss of someone and using it to gain attention for ourselves?

Where to begin? The media are too obvious, they’re a well-oiled exploitation machine.

Social media is too often the Land of Shallow, where pictures, platitudes, Slacktivism, jokes, and memes are welcome, but anything of substance is frequently ignored or seen as annoying.

Yet it’s the memorials that confuse me the most.
What does wasting money on flowers, balloons, teddy bears and candles do?
Does it bring those lost back?
Does it stop the next accident, murder, or suicide?
No. It just mildews.
What a terrible waste.

Maybe it’s a form of pain behaviour. People need to show how much they care, show that they’re in pain.

https://yadadarcyyada.com/2014/08/12/robin-williams-his-last-laugh/

  • Take the money you would spend on items for a memorial and donate it to those in need.
  • Help someone who suffers from mental illness get help or support.
  • Help someone undergoing cancer or other treatments with extra expenses.
  • Help society’s most vulnerable get enough food, shelter, dental care, eye glasses, medicine.
  • Do something useful. Wouldn’t that show you care? Ease your pain?

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Robin Williams chose to leave this world. I expect this loss is felt deeply by his family and friends, and to a lesser degree, by his fans.
If you’re actually upset about this, help someone who is struggling with depression, anxiety, PTSD, addiction, and other forms of mental illness.

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Be kind.

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Maybe we wouldn’t need Suicide Hotlines or Kids Helplines or so many other band-aids if people would stop making so many hurts.

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Be there to listen to someone (hint, turn off your cellphone while listening; seeing your head bent over your phone as you absently say uh-huh at maybe the right spots will probably just remind them of how messed up the world is).
Take the time to be in the moment.

I’ve been a fan of Robin Williams since I saw him as Mork (first on Happy Days then on Mork and Mindy).
I liked most of his work, funny or serious or seriously funny.

I was even one of the 10 (that number is an estimate, it might have been an even dozen) people watching The Crazy Ones, before it was cancelled.

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It’s a distressinhttps://yadadarcyyada.com/2014/08/12/robin-williams-his-last-laugh/g incongruity that many comedians use humour as a mask, a shield, a façade…That while they are making us laugh, making us forget our worries, making us remember that life is worth living they are haunted by inner demons.

Robin Williams was a frenzied mastermind of comedy, or sometimes a serene, gentle man, or an alien, a genie, batty bat, toymaker, spinach-eating strongman, hologram, penguin, robot, a scientist, DJ, doctor, wax figure, dreamer, camper, dad, soldier, psychologist, or whatever he needed to be; he was an actor, an entertainer.

We watch people on screens and think we know them. We don’t.
We don’t know what is in their heart, in their minds.
We don’t know what haunts them, or drives them, sometimes they don’t even know themselves.

It is sad when talent is lost, but instead of fake monuments that will die, or mold, or rot, why not do something that will help people, not just give you a chance to be on TV, something to talk about or post on social media.

https://yadadarcyyada.com/2014/08/12/robin-williams-his-last-laugh/

I know it’s not popular, but do something real (not reality TV real but real real) and meaningful.

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