Posted in Books, Movies, Political, Televison, Weight

This Is Not A Toy

Posted on by D. Parker

https://yadadarcyyada.com/2016/03/18/this-is-not-a-toy/Remember that label?
This is not a toy?
As a child I used to think, really, or is it a toy? As an adult I think, really, or is it a toy?
Labels continue to amuse me. Remove plastic from pizza before placing in the oven. Are we just stopping natural selection with all these labels? Then again, with the taste of some frozen pizzas, who’d notice? It’s also amazing how many “Do not eat” labels on things you wouldn’t possible even think of eating.

https://yadadarcyyada.com/2016/03/18/this-is-not-a-toy/

One of my all-time favourites is: if you can’t read the label, don’t use this. Huh? So basically, don’t spray deodorant in your eyes, sit on an oven door, don’t use a curling iron internally, don’t drink toner, pepper spray can irritate your eyes, hot beverages are indeed hot, and the list goes on. What’s your top weird label, dear readers?

https://yadadarcyyada.com/2016/03/18/this-is-not-a-toy/

1. Then again, observing people, I suppose these labels aren’t as weird as you’d think. Like those people who stand uber close to you in line. Do they think it’ll make the line move faster, or I’ll leave, either way, slow down, I’d appreciate dinner before you get that close.

https://yadadarcyyada.com/2016/03/18/this-is-not-a-toy/

2. What is with eating while driving? Really, is life that busy that people can’t stop and have a sandwich? Try the ‘o’ word: organization. And those poor little Stop signs, they’re getting a complex from being ignored…

https://yadadarcyyada.com/2016/03/18/this-is-not-a-toy/

3. Who writes these TV shows (“Do you have a swab?, “Did you get the swab?” “Are you out of swabs, how can you be out of swabs, we need swabs!”, what you need to get is a Thesaurus and out of Johnson & Johnson’s, ummm, anyway, I digress), books, and/or movies where all characters race around to keep, like, one main character alive? Does this person secretly have the cure for cancer? Other people drop like flies around them. or because of them, or to save them, but as long as they stay alive (more or less), it’s all good.

https://yadadarcyyada.com/2016/03/18/this-is-not-a-toy/

4. Money can’t buy happiness, sure, but it can buy food, shelter, security, I’d be way more comfortable crying in a nice house with a pool and not worrying about money all the time. Just sayin’.

https://yadadarcyyada.com/2016/03/18/this-is-not-a-toy/

5. No wonder young girls are so confused about body image. Women in music videos wearing clothes that could double as napkins gyrating against, well, anything. Men don’t feel the need to dress or act that way. Imagine the time we’d have for equal rights if we had never been told what shape to be, what to wear…who to be.

https://yadadarcyyada.com/2016/03/18/this-is-not-a-toy/

6. If you find politicians horrifying, pretend they’re children (not a big stretch), stop giving them so much attention.

https://yadadarcyyada.com/2016/03/18/this-is-not-a-toy/

7. The news keeps taking about how bad the economy is, not news to me, my economy has always been bad.

https://yadadarcyyada.com/2016/03/18/this-is-not-a-toy/

8. People who complain that you shouldn’t eat non-traditional foods for breakfast clearly haven’t figured out doughnuts are cake which is just like pancakes and you eat those for breakfast, right?

https://yadadarcyyada.com/2016/03/18/this-is-not-a-toy/

9. People who say they don’t do mornings are doing morning as they say it.

https://yadadarcyyada.com/2016/03/18/this-is-not-a-toy/

10. There’s nothing better we can do in this world, no greater kindness than making people feel safe, with food, shelter, comfort, love, and compassion, not fear, hunger, prejudice, poverty, and hatred.https://yadadarcyyada.com/2016/03/18/this-is-not-a-toy/

My last post https://yadadarcyyada.com/2016/03/09/take-on-me/ had all that talk of adulting, this week I put adulting on hold, went to a March Break matinée (yes, alone and isn’t it a weird reflection on society that if I were a man, I would be seen as creepy doing so; a few rotten apples do spoil so much, still got some looks I was there without a child). I thoroughly enjoyed The Peanuts Movie for $3; $1 went to Kids Help Phone and I got coupons (free popcorn and movies) – charity, coupons, childhood, and reclining seats – you can’t see me right now, but I’m The Breakfast Club fist-pumping in the air.

https://yadadarcyyada.com/2016/03/18/this-is-not-a-toy/

My point? Labels are just labels (lawsuits aside), common sense is the best label. Hope your weekend (and the First Day of Spring/Spring Equinox) is a warm hug.

https://yadadarcyyada.com/2016/03/18/this-is-not-a-toy/

Author:

Very me

198 thoughts on “This Is Not A Toy”

  2. I purchased a steamer to replace my broken iron. The instructions are very specific about not steaming clothes while wearing them….

    Maybe we should all just eat some of that silica gel that comes in shoe boxes and just stop reading the labels. They’re so constricting 😉

    Liked by 3 people

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  3. Labels are just labels? I think not. In a culture which is inundated with offers to sue for large sums of money for the most frivolous and stupid incidents, the labels are what manufacturers “fall back on” when faced with a law suit. Try picking up your electric lawnmower and cutting your hedge with it. In the event that you lose a finger or two, that label could become very public in court! 🙂

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  4. LOLLOLLOL to the q-tip one! SO true!

    Good for you, on taking a break from adult-ing, and not caring that other people thought you were odd! To heck with needing to adult all the time!!! Peanuts rocks!

    Okay, I’ll calm down now. 🙂

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    1. Too true and the company knows, what they really should be used for is swabbing crime scenes…I wonder how many times the line, ‘Did you get the swab?’ has been uttered on TV?
      I enjoyed it, good grief, we all need a break and I tried being normal once…worst two minutes of my life. lol 😉
      All the best. 🙂

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      1. I was recently trying to explain to my daughter how you CAN use them, for the outside of your ears. Meanwhile, I’m so guilty of breaking the rules on those danged things! 😉

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  6. You did amazing with this post again, Donna! But your post not only made me laugh. I love to always find such a deep message in your posts. Everybody would rather live in a villa. But only the ones who don’t say, they wouldn’t. What is wrong with being rich. Only rich people can support financially… which again is welcome by those who don’t have it but who judge them for being rich…. Hope this made a bit sense what I wrote…. lol!

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  8. A comedian said something that has stuck with me nearly 30 years later — “Every time you see one of those warning labels, that means some idiot actually did what’s on the label. And the company got sued for millions.”
    So, look at all those warnings again, and imagine the (now rich) idiot as he steamed clothes while wearing them, ate the plastic pizza cover, drove the car with the sun shield covering the windshield (one of my favorites “Remove before driving”), or whatever “Duh” moment you find in a warning label.

    Oh you just made me snort. Because I just remembered that I put a “warning” in my blog post for tomorrow. Bwhahaha. 😈 Not quite the same kind of warning though.
    Dear Donna, thanks for another delightful diversion. Happy St Patrick’s Weekend and super mega green hugs to you. :mrgreen:

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    1. Maybe that’s why I’m still broke and obscure, Teagan, too much common sense…I need to be able to have more ‘Duh’ moments, although I think I have more than enough. 😉
      Now you have me intrigued, dear friend, what kind of warning, but I have to wait…right?
      I’m glad you enjoyed it.
      Megashamrockhugs xox

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  10. You would think common sense was more common. I love where your mind goes, Donna. #3 is something I frequently ponder with a baffled expression, and #5 tends to irk me. Of course, number 10 is the heart and soul of your posts 🙂

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  12. Thanks for the laugh. Unfortunately, many people lack common sense. Not to mention (at least in the US) people seem to like to sue big companies for their own stupidity, that’s why there are ridiculous warnings. I found instructions for how to make a peanut butter and jelly sandwich on the side of a loaf of Wonder bread. I was flabbergasted. I took a picture and posted it on my FB page, it was that unbelievable to me.

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    1. Maybe that’s why I’m still broke and obscure, I have too much common sense.
      Instructions on how to make a PB and J? Wow, that’s tough. It’s a ‘wonder’ if people already didn’t know. lol 😉

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  14. My day job is in the consumer electronics space and many of the labels I’ve seen are simply awesome. Unfortunately pesky non-disclosure agreements prevent me from sharing specific examples of my favorites, so instead all I can mention is my food favorite: the label on a fruit roll-up. Yes folks, please remember to remove foil first before eating.

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    1. I can only imagine the doozys you’ve seen.
      Yes, removing foil would be a good idea, but I wonder if this goes in the same category as the frozen pizza, we might not notice the difference. 😉

      Liked by 1 person

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  20. You had me laughing all the way through this, especially at the thought of people who stand WayTooCloseToYouInLine.

    I love non-traditional foods for breakfast, and your reasoning sounds perfectly fine to me. I mean, really – how much more sugar could there be in a donut when compared to an oily sugary muffin bought at a coffee shop?

    Thanks for always putting things in perspective. This is an important public service you provide your readers.

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    1. From a young age we always ate foods for breakfast that people told us were ‘weird’ – soup, stew, pizza, cake, pasta…what’s the difference, food is food.
      lol I don’t know about that but I appreciate your wise and kind comments. 🙂
      Hope this weekend treats you well. 🙂

      Liked by 2 people

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  23. My favourite has to be on a tin of peanuts ‘May contain peanuts’ like those will allergies can’t work it out.
    I’m sending Gargantuan Hugs to you Donna xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

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    1. Those with allergies should be aware of these things and those who aren’t would be disappointed if the peanuts didn’t contain peanuts, then again, who knows what’s in things these days? lol 😉
      Hope this weekend is treating you well, David and Happy Happy Happy Hugs Birthday!!! 🙂
      Massive peanuty hugs xoxoxoxoxoxoxox

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  24. Yes, signs and labels can be tricky. The other day I spent the entire afternoon in a café because the sign on the door said that the world outside was closed. Fortunately, it opened again at half past five … 🙂

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  26. Pingback: My Article Read (3-18-2016) – My Daily Musing

    1. Thank you kindly for including me in this lovely list and I’m #42 – the answer to life, the universe and everything!!! 🙂 Thanks again and hope this weekend is treating you well. 🙂

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  27. As a copywriter for the Sears Catalog, we’d have to write “Food not included with grill,” and other obvious statements. I always wanted to see if I could get away with saying, “Man not included with underwear.”

    Liked by 2 people

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  28. I have to say I have never thought about labels before…until now. You are so right!!!! 🙂 Just popping in from WkendBlogShare

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  29. This strikes very close to home for me since part of my job includes being responsible for producing artwork, packaging, labeling, user manuals, and other documentation for the power tool industry.
    I always remind my team for the sake of liability protection to try to think like the stupidest person on earth, and then produce our work to help prevent that person from hurting themselves.
    And yet every once in a while someone STILL manages to out-stupid us 😦

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    1. Exactly. 😉
      So glad you found me, I’m heading back there later to check out more bloggers, now we’ve found each other I hope we can virtually visit often. 🙂
      Hope this weekend treats you well. 🙂

      Liked by 2 people

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  31. This is so funny, and yet there is a deeper truth here too. It reminds me of the character in the Hitchhikers Guide to the Galaxy books, who decides he has to leave the earth because of the instruction label on a pack of toothpicks.

    I shake my head at some of the labels too – remove plastic while cooking is just one of many, and I also like the labels that say, ‘Do not remove label’ because then I immediately want to just to see what will happen, if label ninjas will drop from the ceiling or something. And then I wonder if the label is what’s holding the entire device together, if it’s somehow intrinsic to the existence of the object, and then I think that’s sad.

    Hope your weekend is going well too! 🙂

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  33. We had a baby stroller with a warning label that read: “Do not fold stroller with child inside.” I’m pretty sure anyone who couldn’t figure that out probably couldn’t figure out how to have sex in the first place. That being said, loved this post and am glad our parents figured out how to have you 😉

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  35. I think all warning labels should be removed, and let natural selection take over. And dismiss all lawsuits related to no warning labels!!
    Is there anyone on the planet who only q-tips the outer part of the ear???

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    1. I kept many of those labels on for years until one day I realized those labels were meant for the sellers of pillows, mattresses, etc. not the customers…I still sometimes leave them on though, you know, just in case. 😉
      Hope this weekend is treating you well (without criminal prosecution). 😉

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      1. I have some pillows to destroy now.. I should take all the warning labels of cig packs, toilets, pillow cases, milk cartons and make a giant collage out of them.

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    1. So glad to hear that. 🙂
      It was a lovely weekend, despite my son’s male cold which as we know are much worse than a female cold somehow.
      And I saw a robin sitting in the snow so that started the week out on an interesting note. 😉
      Hope this week treats you kindly. 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

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  42. Great post as always Donna. I do agree that some warning labels are almost ridiculous, but they’ll cram as much as they can on them because we live in a world where people love to sue and I think it’s like writing a protection clause on everything for ‘stupid protection’. That would mean for example, people who don’t know that things such as knives, lawn mowers, scissors and the like could actually cut off a digit. But we get to laugh. 🙂 Have a great week! 🙂

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    1. Maybe I’m just jealous that I have too much common sense or brain power to have done those things and sued…maybe not, either way, the labels are amusing and at times, intriguing. 😉
      Hope this week treats you well, Debby, and hope you’re feeling better. Hugs xo

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  46. The really sad thing about those labels is that they probably came about because someone sued the company (or another like it) for precisely the thing warned against – and won.
    Great post as always.

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  47. Great (funny) rant. You know the warning labels are all from the respective legal departments in hopes of avoid product liability suits. Doesn’t make them any less ridiculous and sometimes annoying. More amusing are the similar labels from cheaper products made in other countries by manufacturers who don’t bother (or can’t afford) to translate the warnings into sensible English.

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  50. Your posts always make me laugh. Thanks for being you.
    Those labels are something. The one that always gets me is the one on the milk carton that says “Contains Milk.” I would hope so! It’s a reflection of the world we live in.

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  51. You’re so right! I think labels are messing with the natural selection process… remove labels, and thin out certain qualities of the gene pool, I say. 😉

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      3. The best package I’ve seen was on an airplane – those little peanut packages they give you: Instructions were: “Open packet. Eat Nuts.” And then, the priceless warning label: “Warning: May contain nuts.”

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  53. Most readers thanked you for being so funny and entertaining. I found it not so funny because it is so true. When an adult pulls up, orders ‘hot’ coffee, spills it while trying to drive, and burns himself, maybe they shouldn’t file a lawsuit that ends with a group of other adults awarding her $2.8M, and coffee having to be labeled as ‘hot.’ My question is why has common sense disappeared? Does Facebook or Twitter need to offer a class? 🙂

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    1. I don’t know if there’s less common sense or just more people without common sense, either way, I agree, the longer I live the more I wish people had it. Hope this week is treating you kindly 🙂

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  55. Nice wrap up: 10. There’s nothing better we can do in this world, no greater kindness than making people feel safe, with food, shelter, comfort, love, and compassion, not fear, hunger, prejudice, poverty, and hatred.

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      3. Had a wee look round your site, loving your gifs they are awesome and love your use of different colours – had a teacher who said you should do that to make things more interesting and get peoples attention x followed you to on WP and Twitter xx

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      4. I think of the colours as my version of art, clearly I am not too talentd in that department if this is what I must resort to lol 😉
        Glad we found each other in this giant virtual haystack, hope this weekend treats you well. 🙂

        Liked by 1 person

      6. Hi there back! 🙂
        That’s very sweet of you, congrats on your nomination, well-deserved! I don’t technically accept awards anymore, but thank you so much for thinking of me, very kind of you. 🙂
        Hope this weekend is treating you well. 🙂

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  58. This is too funny!! My partner is always saying we should remove the silly warning labels and let common sense thin out the herd. This post was a bright spot in my day stuck in bed being sick!

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  59. Pingback: My Picks Of The Week #14 | A Momma's View

    1. Thank you so much!!! Wow! I’m not only thrilled, but I’m enjoying popping by the other bloggers as well, I’m in awesome company here, including the picker (eww, that sounds kinda gross, oops). 😉
      Off to share all over the place and visit some more.
      Thank you again and Hop-py Easter!!! All the best!

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    1. Where else were you going to use them, space, the Earth’s core, another dimension? Although those could technically count too. Tricky. Do we dare ask what your other plans were? lol 😉

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      5. I’m making it far more scandalous than it was. After reading that warning, though, I wanted to find a way to string them inside the door jamb so that they were both inside and out. I’d take photos and tag the light company on social media.

        (Then i realized I could be eating cookies and drinking eggnog instead.)

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  62. Pingback: Featured Bloggers 3/31/16: How to Blog Network | Dream Big, Dream Often

  63. Love this! You’re right, labels can’t replace common sense but if we don’t have labels there’s no reminder for some to use that common sense. Love your sense of humour. Thanks for stopping by and following my blog.

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    1. There is nothing wrong with that, Jonathan, nothing at all. 🙂
      Thank you kindly for the reblog, much appreciated.
      Hope this weekend is a lovely journey for you. 🙂

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  65. OH the chainsaw warning is very useful 😉 LOL well there’s a shortage of common sense these days … so… 😉 I found this line very true (and sad): “Women in music videos wearing clothes that could double as napkins gyrating against, well, anything.” — Yes, it’s not surprising teens’ body image issues are worsening year by year…!

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    1. Yes, who knows how we’d use chainsaws without that warning. 😉
      It’s so weird to watch these women all gyrating around and the men are fully dressed. Young women are getting terrible messages about who they should be or think they should be.

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