Posted in Canada, Family, Holidays, Parenting, Political, Uncategorized

How To Be Good To One Another

Posted on by D. Parker

1funny612One life but we’re not the same we get to carry each other,
carry each other.
One…One…One…
~U2

How to be good to one another. We could start by spending less time arguing about: who’s right, who’s wrong, who’s what, who’s to blame.

The internet exploded last week, with rainbows, due to the U.S. Supreme Court same-sex marriage decision.
Online profile pictures went rainbow. #LoveWins trended worldwide.
June is Gay Pride Month so this added to the parties, parades, pride.
I’m pretty sure if you checked, your poo might be rainbow too.

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It’s a great step for equality, I only hope hype and hyperbole don’t bog down the message that it’s not so much about this issue, but about fighting for rights, not just new ones, but the ones we already enjoy.

It’s been 10 years of marriage equality in Canada (Happy Belated Birthday Canada! You don’t look a day over 147), joined by 17 other countries: Argentina, Belgium, Brazil, Denmark, France, Iceland, Luxembourg, the Netherlands, New Zealand, Norway, Portugal, South Africa, Spain, Uruguay, Sweden, the United Kingdom, and now The United States of America. Come on, why aren’t there more? Who cares who you love, as long as you love?

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Sadly, on the same day of this ruling, there were also:
terrorist attacks, natural disasters, murders, child abuse, rapes, corruption, and more.
This decision doesn’t stop bigotry, hatred, racism, or human rights abuses.
It doesn’t feed the world’s hungry, or stop conflicts,
but it does add some equality (can’t have enough of that),
it makes people happy (especially wedding planners and lawyers),
and it shows that justice is still out there, we just have to expand its reach.

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I’m always amazed at how so many people have the time or energy for:
hate, prejudice, racism, hypocrisy, manipulation, machinations, lying, stealing, playing the ‘gotcha’ game, cheating, and judging – especially for people or groups of people they don’t even know.
That must be draining, or maybe invigorating? I can understand, everyone has felt or done that stuff at one time or another, but holding onto that just seems weird and in the end, you must hate yourself the most.

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Week 5 of my year-long try-to-find-happiness challenge is on.
Here are the first 4 weeks if you want to catch up or need a refresher.
https://yadadarcyyada.com/2015/06/03/dont-worry-be-happy/
https://yadadarcyyada.com/2015/06/09/to-blog-or-not-to-blog/
https://yadadarcyyada.com/2015/06/15/rock-me-amadeus/
https://yadadarcyyada.com/2015/06/25/in-my-life-i-loved-them-all/

Week 5 (approximately 10% done!):

1. Accept that apology never given. This one is soooo difficult, but this is something I really want to do for myself, but more, something I want to teach my son.

2. Embrace my age gracefully, doing a fairly good job, but I’m still going to avoid full-length mirrors, come on, we’ve all seen funhouses, these have got to be the same mirrors, right?

July 1 Do something really Canadian for Canada Day. Maybe respectfully pour Canadian beer on maple syrup butter tarts, Nanaimo bars, and poutine while playing hockey, eh.

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4. Drink one more glass of water per day.

5. Pack up a box of stuff and give it away.

July 4 Celebrate our American neighbours by watching that fascinating documentary about the time they saved the world from alien invasion, you know, Independence Day.

7. Clean out that closet. I thought I should tell someone where I’m going so if I’m not back in an hour, send help.

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How to be good to one another? Be kind and accepting. Accept that people have different beliefs, opinions, cultures, politics, points of view, religions, lifestyles, life experiences, abilities, neurofunctions; different ways to love, to live, to grieve, to have fun, to be angry, to be sad. Just because someone isn’t the same as you doesn’t mean they’re: wrong, scary, defective, a sinner, a monster, or a loser. As long as it doesn’t hurt anyone, don’t worry about different.
Life’s way too short to be: feared or fearful, hating or hated; try to love and be loved.

If you really have to worry about something,
worry about being good to one another.

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Author:

Very me

129 thoughts on “How To Be Good To One Another”

  1. That is such an amazing post! So much love and compassion, tolerance and respect. You nail it all down with every word! “Who cares who you love, as long as you love?” That is something I always try to spread as well. I love how you talk about tolerance towards the differences. In the end the differences are the connecting link. They show us that there is so much more to know, to see, and to be than what we have believed. Only when we combine all our differences we can become this onness we need in order to make this world a stable better place. Thank you for this beautiful post!

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    1. Thank you kindly Erika.
      If we could just learn to accept and even appreciate differences we’d see that they connect and complement each other. 🙂
      Hope this day is good to you. 🙂

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      3. I am completely with you in that. We cannot be everybodies darling and don’t need to be. It is much more important to not lose ourselves in the senseless try to make us everbodies darling. Keep it up, I am glad that we met 😊

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  2. Having hatred is bad enough but generating more must be so demoralising. People are different but equality is something that most of us are used to, that’s most of us-not all. We need to ensure that the equality includes everyone. What we can’t afford to do is let the bigots tell us that they’re the ones who are being excluded, mistreated, misquoted and that their real concern is for children, children who are not even part of the current debate.
    Don’t be sidetracked. Celebrate finally catching up. Celebrate love between whoever but don’t allow yourself to be poisoned by those who have no real concern for others.
    Give love and hopefully love will always be returned. Give hate and you can be sure it will come back at you.Share Hugs across the globe.
    xxx Massive Hugs xxx

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      2. Oh David, I’m so pleased to hear that, massive hugs, sweetie and keep getting better and better. 🙂
        Can’t wait to hear about your week…and Mike…and Reuben and all. 🙂

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    1. It’s so difficult, isn’t it? I figure I’m doing it for myself. They’re not sorry so they’ve moved on probably to hurt more people, but if I don’t forgive, I’m staying there and that’s not good for me. But it’s so hard to do.

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  4. Oh thank goodness — that’s what all the rainbows were about. It’s really such a relief to know. That rainbow colored poo was very disconcerting!
    No… the Court decision won’t cure all those truly major, global ills. But doing something good, whether large or small is always a step toward healing the planet.
    Mega hugs my friend! ❤ 😀 ⭐

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  5. A very nice read. It’s so much easier being kind than being mean. I wonder why some just like doing things the hard way. “One” by U2 has always been a favorite of mine. I haven’t listened to it for quite some time. I just added it to my Deezer playlist. Thanks!

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  9. This is a post that made me feel several emotions and above all laughter and happiness. Thank you very much. I have decided for myself that some fights and feeling of hurt and frustrations are not worth it. Just walk away… Your post reminded me of the events of what happened today with my son. I promised both my sons (16 and 19), I will stop being angry – quickly. It has been three weeks. 🙂 This promise was made after weeks of trouble with my little on (16) who is so argumentative – so his older brother said – we could all get on better, if his brother and I did not erupt simultaneously. Like two Papua New Guinean volcanoes. We are alike (apparently). Hmmm. Today, the little one left my bank card at home. In front of a long shopping queue and with will a trolley full of groceries, I could not find my card in my purse. The trouble-maker knew but did not speak. I first sent him to the car to find it. On his return and to his panic but surprise, I calmly apologised to the check-out man and went to the car again to find the card myself – without getting angry. Upon returning to the shop and in-front of everyone without the card, I apologised again and asked if we could return and pick up the groceries. Then my son told me he knew where the card was. He was so scared, but I laughed and said, ‘let’s go home and get it”; so when we picked up the groceries and came home. He hugged me. I told him, I was proud of myself. Hahahaha. Happy ending!

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  11. As usual I agree with every well-chosen word Donna! I can’t believe how much negative energy people expend in their lives – life is so darn short, if you can’t try and make the world a little nicer as you go along, what on earth is the point of it all? Wishing you a positive weekend ! 🙂

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    1. Thank you kindly. 🙂
      It’s astonishing people have so much time and energy for hate, negativity – life is much too short.
      Thank you and hope this weekend treats you well – and hopefully some relief from the heat, apparently some of it is heading our way too – fans at the ready! 😉

      Liked by 1 person

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      4. I wish we could find a way to cool down heatwaves then heat up cold waves, but then that would probably mess with the climate even more…or maybe not.

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  12. I love this! Especially the “Go Canada” bits – poutine has no calories on Canada Day 😉

    Did you see the crackpot posts though? The meme with “I’m moving to Canada” as some weirdass protest against the Supreme Court decision? I almost wanted to post one back to say, “Draft Dodgers had principles, we don’t want your hatin’ homophobe self up here” SMH 😀

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    1. And Nanaimo bars, they are free calories on Canada Day too (they should be always). 😉
      I didn’t understand those, we’ve had marriage equality for 10 years, although I think your response has a good point. 😉

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      1. Yes! Always, though… I might not be able to fit in to ON if that were the case 🙂
        Right?! I think it’s just not known in general that we do, which made responses from American celebrities who do know, all the more funny!

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      2. We just have to be content to dream of things like poutine more often than we partake.
        I still love the Rick Mercer ‘Talking to Americans’ specials, too funny. 😉

        Liked by 1 person

  14. It’s a great day for wedding planners and divorce lawyers. Their businesses are going to be booming.

    People forget that the Equal Rights Amendment for women (1/2 the population) never passed. An unmarried woman was called “Miss.” & as someone in the forefront of using the word “Ms.” I guarantee it was no picnic.

    I grew up during a time where a woman was discouraged from a career when we graduated from high school, instead we were encouraged to become a teacher, stewardess, nurse or secretary. Never were we encouraged to become a physicist, politician or (God forbid) a minister. Though the climate is better in the workplace (no one tolerates it when your boss slaps you on the butt), women still have most of the domestic duties while working a full-time job.

    I’ll celebrate when 1/2 the population truly has equal rights. I’ll know when that day comes…men will start wearing stilettos, too. That’s when I’ll be slathering rainbows all over the place. 🙂

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    1. That’s the thing, this is just a step, people are acting like it’s the second coming, no, it doesn’t change much, we need to keep fighting for new rights and to hold on to the ones we have. 🙂
      Stilettos, I’m shuddering, no one should have to endure such torture. 😉

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  15. “Who cares who you love, as long as you love?”

    See, that’s the thing. I never needed my government to sanction my love one way or the other. Never did. Never will.

    I don’t like being told I’m a HATER if I disagree with somebody. That’s wrong. That’s what a lot of people don’t get. But that’s what’s happening. If I disagree with abortion, I hate women. If I don’t think the federal government should get involved in the gay marriage debate (as 4 of our supreme court justices also said), I hate gay people.

    But of course, none of that is correct.

    No, I’m the same nice, tolerant, respectful guy I was last week. Too many left wingers in this country label you as intolerant if you disagree with them; they can’t be tolerant enough to tolerate the tolerance they demand from others.

    Ask my gay friends if I hate gay people. Ask the many wonderful women in my life if I hate women. Get serious. (And stop making me list them as gay friends; it seems kinda odd. They’re friends. If I have to label my friends into groups, it’ll be “good friends” and “very good friends” and “friends who’d lend me money.”)

    We can disagree without hating. At least I can.

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    1. I think agreeing to disagree, respectfully is the best way to go.
      Unfortunately I don’t think it’s narrowed to left-wingers. I wonder sometimes if our fear levels are being raised because we’re exposed to so much different in short periods of time now, if it just isn’t overwhelming and if some people had more time to process the information they might be fine with it.
      I wish governments didn’t have to get involved with issues as much either, but if people can’t find ways to work together and companies won’t, it will keep happening. Some countries have had to pass laws to get people to remove snow from their cars, how is that something government should be involved it or not talking on mobile devices while driving, yet people are putting others at risk.
      I think disgreeing is actually essential to people and society as a whole, you’re right, it’s how we do it that makes a difference. 🙂

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    1. One of the huge mysteries of the universe, right up there with wormholes, Dark Matter and Fermi Bubbles (I’m reading a science book today, can you tell?). 😉
      Thank you, hope you have a lovely Independence Day (with no alien invasions, unsafe fireworks, but lots of fun). 🙂

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  20. Such a lovely post. The ongoing hatred and bigotry in this world is truly baffling, and I think fear is at the heart of it. I just don’t get this need to judge people when their actions 1) Have nothing to do with you, and 2) are not hurting others. But I should put that aside really, and focus on the achievements that have been made. Good on the USA.

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    1. Wise words. I just can’t comprehend how people have the time and energy to worry about everyone else’s business.
      You’re so spot on, we should focus on the achievements. 🙂
      Thanks for dropping by, hope this day is treating you kindly. 🙂

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  21. Reblogged this on ' Ace Social & Media News ' and commented:
    Be good to each other and they will be good to you! Nearly brought me out as a singer. Well nearly!! #Donnamazing post.
    By the way l have become a carpenters son – well apprentice but he treats me like a son – he is 68 and a real great guy and fantastic carpenter. You said one door closes and one shuts. 🙂

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    1. I’m so happy to hear that Ian, it’s true, opportunities show up, sometimes when we least expect them and how we expect them, you just have to be open.
      Thank you kindly for the reblog and all the best to you in your new path. Hope this day is good to you. 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

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  22. 1,2,5,7………..Moi? A fat, unforgiving hoarder? Surely not! LoL!
    How are you? You coping ok? I lost someone this week, too. Totally unexpected, still don’t know what happened, texted him and got a very late reply back from his wife, saying “he has passed away”, not “he passed away”, which makes me think it’s recent. We were friendly, but not more than close acquaintances…..he was my financial advisor and I saw him maybe three times a year or more or less often depending. A real shock. I don’t even know if I’ve missed the funeral, and I would have liked to have paid my respects. Can’t believe it. He was about my age, possibly younger, with no health issues that I know of. 3 kids, lovely wife and house. Poor them.

    L. X

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    1. lol Of course not. 😉
      I had known it was coming, this loss, but it still hurts deeply, just as the love had been deep. It’s difficult to lose people, but sadly, it’s part of life.
      Hope you are feeling well, all things considered and hope this day is treating you kindly. 🙂

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      1. Your articles are very amusing and I mean that in the best possible way, wonderful advice as well as a twinkle in the eye! Marvelous!

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      2. Thank you. I’m so glad we found each other in this giant virtual haystack. 🙂
        Loved your post today with the young boy playing piano, when you heard something that beautiful you understand that music is a language of all. 🙂

        Liked by 1 person

      11. I love reading, I have neglected my book reading lately. I need to get a really good one and get into it. Such wonderful therapy and escape from the chaos for a while 🙂

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      15. I recently read I,Claudius . It was remarkable even if you have no real interest in the Roman Empire it’s a great read My favorite American classic is American Tragedy. Got to do more reading its really a great get-away .hope you have a great week end .
        🙂

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  27. I don’t think you are old enough to remember when the news only reflected what happened in your own city and you didn’t know all the ups and downs going on across the entire world. It wasn’t necessarily a kindler, gentler world but just that we weren’t aware of all the atrocities. Being kind to one another would certainly be a good place to start in this global world we now live in. 🙂

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    1. More than old enough to remember that and I grew up in a small town in Northern Ontario (Canada) and we were, now, looking back fairly insulated against many of the horrors of the world, but my family was always into news, politics, causes, etc. so I knew a lot. You’re right, maybe it was kinder, but it sure seemed like it. 🙂

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