Posted in Books, Movies, Uncategorized, Zombies

Black and Blue and Grey Valentine’s Day

1love28Fifty Shags of Grey, oops, I mean Fifty Shades of Grey is an impressive book because marketing people convinced the masses it’s impressive. It’s like the Furby or Cabbage Patch Kids or Tickle Me Elmo, ok, maybe more like, Tie Me Up and Tickle Me Elmo.

If people are just reading these books as escapism, great. I just hope these books don’t confuse women even more, reinforcing the lingering, misguided belief that Twisted Prince Charming, no matter how messed up he is, can change, if he just finds the right woman. Ooooooookay. Wow, that’s a whole other post.

It’s wonderful to crush on Daryl Dixon (Norman Reedus) in The Walking Dead, while ignoring that he probably smells really bad by this point in the zombie apocalypse.wd9Or watching Snow White and thinking your Prince will waltz into your life and make it all better with a kiss, when it’s actually more like a creepy guy finds a random corpse in the woods and yes, kisses it.

50shades6I don’t think reading any book is wrong, we all have our preferences. This isn’t new, it’s just a fantastic marketing-made phenomenon (not that I’d say no if it was my books). Essentially, this is Twilight without the supernatural and with way more leather.

The second book, Fifty Shades Darker is even draggier than the first. Christian Grey, still twisted as a pretzel, is now all domesticated and kitteny, though his claws are still twitchy. Some women think Grey is rich, hot, and charming, but his Narcissistic Personality Disorder would get old pretty fast. Honey, tonight instead of staying in, maybe you could see your therapist…again.

Hopefully the 3rd book picks up because this is slowly, painfully getting Fifty Shades of Boring. Sigh, no, Fifty Shades Freed continues the lacklustre and somehow, I knew the author would finish off with a Happy Ending.

As for the movie, it doesn’t matter who the actors are, it’s going to be so stylized there’s little need for actors to even be there, you could go with CGI and people would still be drooling…or complaining.

I wonder how many people, while searching for the ‘perfect’ man or woman, may miss out on the person that can imperfectly add to their happiness?

50shades5The black and blue in the title also pertains to my shin, which had a run-in with a shovel this morning.
Happy Valentine’s Day, said Winter.

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Very me

30 thoughts on “Black and Blue and Grey Valentine’s Day

    1. Thank you for the kind words and the reblog, much appreciated. 🙂
      And I sincerely hope not too many will take the books as tutorials.
      Hope this day is treating you kindly. 🙂

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  1. Sorry about the black and blue encounter with the shovel! I’m not at all tempted to either read the book or see the movie! I can’t imagine a less romantic plot but then to each his or her own!

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  2. OKAY. Escape is good. 50 shades of escape, not so much. for little ole me. Ugh. I need emotional involvement. Anyhoo, want to say there are NO perfect people out there. We must learn to love REAL people and work together to make our lives better.
    I read Book 1 and had to force myself to finish it. Forget the rest. Wooden. Mechanical. Narcissistic. I’m done.

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  3. Go Betty! Heck, Im sure she could probably rewrite the books into something more interesting 😀
    And yes, the books are a great example of sensationalising in the media. I have read them as my friends were talking about them – it was a kind of morbid curiosity, really. I spent a lot of time having the urge to hit the characters, not out of a kinky fantasy but because Ana was so annoying. And, yeah, Bella Swan needed a slap too. 😉

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  4. I tried to read it. I started it. I know there are arguments that the book is missing emotion and / or romance. Okay, remove those from the equation and look at it as a sexy book for fun times to read together. Yikes. It reminds me of cybersex from AOL chat circa 2001. I couldn’t get anything from it at all. I can not finish it.

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  5. I haven’t read 50 shades of anything but in Chicago, the day the movie came out a woman was raped in the way someone must have been raped in the film, since they said it was just like it. So…

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    1. That’s just an excuse, like saying someone would act out something from TV, movies, books or video games.
      No one was raped in the book or movie, they were two adults having consenting intercourse.
      If it hadn’t been that, it would have been some other excuse.
      One is a movie, the other a vile criminal act.

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